Wednesday 2 December

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Friday 4 December

Hiya folks!!!! ... Time again for another update....

Bit delayed in getting the update out as I found out on Friday that Saturday was the last day for airmail Christmas post. As I don't normally start thinking about Christmas until a few hours before the event, it's come as a bit of a shock to the system - so it was a bit busy getting a few last minute things for my overseas pals and still be within the deadline. Anyway, the aardvarks have now been despatched, so I can rest easy until the day before the UK deadline!!!

Not one of life's scintillating weeks especially. However, we had the appearance of a decent amount of snow on Saturday morning and it makes a rather fine sight. We could do with some crisp weather and at last, it's arrived - rather that, than the damp muggy stuff we've had for ages this year.

On a seasonal note, Trude is getting into the swing of Christmas at school - it lasts all December, which probably explains why she has had enough by the time the real thing arrives. The only amusing school tale I can recall right now is when one of her pupils wrote about the Nativity "these three wise guys came to visit the baby Jesus"!!! Wise guys, eh?? LOL!!

We always like a big tree at home - well Simon and I do, anyway. In my case, it's a throwback to the days when my dad used to go down to the Smithfield wholesale market in Manchester and get the biggest one he could cart home. The objective was to get one so big that it needed to have top and bottom pruned to get it into the living room. The Christmas tree buying seems to be Trude's department and mostly we've had some decent sized trees apart from one year when a rather miserable specimen appeared - fortunately that wasn't repeated!!! Last year, Trude got a biggie and proceeded to entertain the neighbours taking some considerable time extricating it from her car - pity no-one had a camcorder going!!! Well, if she chooses to go out for these things while I'm asleep, that's her lookout!!! Anyway, she has refused to have anything to do with Christmas tree purchase and delivery this year - however, Simon has a Saturday job at a local greengrocers, so we should be in line for a good un.... watch this space....

The episode commences at Greg's flat. Greg is in the lounge, fast asleep under the covers. Sally is getting the gurls ready for school. They ask her whether he is poorly. "No, he isn't" is her reply. She asks a bleary-eyed Greg whether he is getting up. He tells her he feels awful, but her reply is that it is nothing to how she feels. She ushers the girls out.

It's breakfast time at Ashley's. Zoe comes down, much to Ashley's surprise - he thought she might be having a lie-in. She tells him that she had a lot of reading to do and asks whether she disturbed him coming in the previous night. No is his reply. Apparently it was after 2 a.m. and she had had a busy night at the soup kitchen - it was freezing, she tells him. He tells her that he had a visitor the previous night, but she seems to be unaware of this. Ashley informs her that her pal, Ben, had come along and that he wanted Ashley out of the way - apparently he is a bad influence "and guess what, I'm negative. What's he? An electrician, or what?" (LOL!!) Zoe maintains that Ben is alright. In Ashley's eyes "he flaming isn't. He's an head case and if you go along with these daft ideas, you'll be one and all." When Zoe replies that Ben isn't harming anyone, Ashley disagrees "except you. I don't want you mixing with him anymore." That is like a red rag to a bull for Zoe, as she tells him she is being purified tonight. All she has learned, all she has worked for, is leading up to tonight, she cannot just throw it all away. Ashley insists she must. She asks him why he doesn't treating her like a grown-up, instead of telling her what to do, she knows her own mind. "Ah, but do you?" and "yeah" are the final salvoes from Ashley and Zoe in this heated exchange, as Ashley realises there is no meeting of the minds on this topic. He has to get back to the shop.

At the Kabin, Nick is still trying to patch up matters with Leanne following her discovery of him in the nude, modelling for Miranda. It's only a job, like modelling for clothes, he tells her, but she corrects him, it's modelling your body. He cannot see anything wrong in that, he cannot understand what it is that he has done wrong - that is it, she tells him, she doesn't know either, as he hasn't told her, worse than that, he has actually lied about it, all that rubbish about being a lab technician, when the whole time, he was prancing about in front of a load of strangers in his birthday suit. There's no prancing, he tells her (yeah, right, wood doesn't prance, does it?), it's all dead artistic. "Yeah, that's what they all say" is her riposte. He tells her that she doesn't have a clue, the whole point is having to sit still for hours, it's agony, its not an easy job, he has had aches in muscles he never knew he had - "yeah, I bet you have" is her cynical retort. He is irritated at her making it sound so sleazy, it's all very innocent, if she doesn't believe him, why doesn't she ask Roy and Hayley, because they turned up to the art class. Leanne is horrified at this revelation, "who else knows, the whole flipping street, by the sound of it, everybody, except your own wife?"

At the factory, Hayley is having a natter with Janice. She asks how she is coping. Janice tells her that Les should be better by now, but he isn't. The problem is that the hospital have taken offence to Les, they don't realise how much pain he is in. They have obviously looked at his old track record and decided he is up to his tricks again. At that point, Mike Baldwin comes into view, with Jackie Dobbs in tow - he introduces her as the new recruit, who has started this morning and asks Hayley to show her the ropes. Hayley is chuffed to mint balls at being asked, but Janice has the measure of the job in hand - "rather you than me" she murmurs. Jackie comes over to her mentor and immediately asks what the fiddle is. Hayley is puzzled by this question, so Jackie explains to her that they must have a little fiddle going with the level of wages that Baldwin is paying them here - they must have a way of making their money up. There is nothing like that going on, is Hayley's reply. Jackie attributes Hayley's reticence to trust and assures her that she knows how to keep her mouth shut (no comment!!). Hayley insists there is no scam, to which Jackie replies "it looks like I'm going to be treating you the ropes!" Hayley asks whether Jackie has done this sort of work before - she has "years of experience. Have you ever heard of 'Strangeways' Fashions'" she asks. When Hayley innocently replies that she hasn't, Jackie explains to her that she was in "the nick, with me best mate, Deirdre. Didn't she tell you?" (For the benefit of overseas readers, Strangeways is the name of a local prison in Manchester.) At that point, Deirdre comes into the outer office and Jackie tells her she was just "telling Hazel about Strangeways Fashions - poor Deirdre looks highly embarrassed.

Having got the girls out of the way, Sally is determined to talk things through with Greg, after the previous night's episode. Greg's mind is a blank, as he is totally oblivious of what Sally is talking about. "Last night, for a start" she tells him. He still doesn't have a clue, so she shows him her grazed and swollen arm. "How did you do that?" he asks her. She is astonished at his memory lapse and reminds him that he pushed her. He feebly responds that he might have lost his balance, it was an accident, he tells her, sheepishly. She replies that she knows what happened and she was sober. "Well, that's it then, the booze, sorry, I don't remember. Was I a real pain?" is his explanation. Sally asks him how sorry he actually is, sorry enough to give up the booze. She maintains that he has a drink problem and that she wants him to give up the drink altogether. He apologises for the accident but points out that you have to drink when you are networking (now I know that Windows networking has had its problems but it hasn't turned me to drink, well, it nearly did once, but that was a hardware motherboard incompatibility problem - sorry, anorak mode off again). He promises that he will cut down and the problem will not recur. Sally warns him that it had better not - if it happens again, she will be straight out of the door. Greg asks whether that is all she wants to talk about, but, judging by her response, it clearly isn't, but his hangover is his preoccupation as he goes for something to make it better (erhum... How about a gun? Put us all out of our misery, eh??).

Ashley is in the café, following up the earlier conversation with Zoe. She is telling him that he doesn't own her. Neither does Ben, although he talks as if he does, is Ashley's reply. When he tells her he wants to discuss the matter further when he comes home, she agrees, but points out that it will not make any difference. All he wants is for her to postpone her decision, as he doesn't believe she has thought it through. She confirms that it is what she wants and she is ready for it. They agree to meet up later.

At the café, Gail hands over the post to Roy. He opens it to find a letter from the Estate Agent, telling him that "in view of the fact that we have no response to our very generous offer to buy the lease on your property, we have advised our client to start looking for alternative premises. Unless we hear from you by December 10th, we shall withdraw the offer." Roy is indignant at this letter, they are not holding him to ransom.

Greg and Sally are still trying to sort out their problems. Greg is telling her that he is not trying to make excuses, but he has a lot of responsibilities weighing down on him. It was his idea to start the business in the first place and he was the one who persuaded her to use her mother's money - he has to make it work for her. "We both have" is her reply, "that's no reason for you to go out and get drunk." He has to all the hustling, make all the contacts, he tells her, he is the one under all the stress. She points out that it is hardly easy for her, being stuck in the office, sitting in the office all on her own, day after day - she has to make decisions too and she is the one who gets the blame when she gets things wrong. He concedes that it is difficult for both of them, but she is annoyed as she doesn't have a clue where they are up to, half the time, he doesn't tell her anything. He replies that he doesn't want to worry her and how she gets upset when things go pear-shaped. She indignantly tells him she is his partner, not his secretary, he has to keep her informed, for all she knows they could be going bankrupt. They're not, no chance, he replies. She hopes he is right because she has put a lot into the business, and not just financially. All they need is one good deal, he tells her, to get them back on top, it's only a matter of time. Her reply is that this not going to happen being sat at home and asks whether he is going into the office today. He will be in shortly, after he has had his breakfast.

... and the theme tune comes in, on cue for the end of part 1

After the ads, it's part 2
The second part of the programme commences at the pub. Jackie is holding court in front of the factory girls, reminiscing about the characters in prison, much to Deirdre's continuing embarrassment. She refers to "Welsh Glenda" who "fancied our Deirdre something rotten" - Janice points out that maybe Deirdre doesn't wish to be reminded of prison, but Jackie cannot see anything wrong with this, "it's a laugh, isn't it, Hazel?" Janice corrects her, but Jackie continues regardless, continuing to refer to Hayley as Hazel. One of the girls asks her what she was in prison for, to be told it was GBH. She explains that some "soft cow was messing around with her fella", so he ended up putting her in hospital for 10 days and on the sick for a month - as to her fella, he did GBH to him, as well, although it "didn't come up in court, that was just between me and him." At that stage, Roy pops his head round the corner and asks to have a word with Hayley. Hayley is relieved to see Roy and explains that Jackie is a friend of Deirdre's, but that Deirdre doesn't want to have anything to do with her, how she has to look after her and how Jackie has been in prison for GBH on a woman. Hayley is afraid of what will happen when Jackie finds out about her. Roy wonders whether Jackie's spell in prison will make her "more, you know, broad-minded" (some hope, Roy). Roy then shows her the letter he has received from the Estate Agents.

Round the corner in the pub, Greg is calling someone on his mobile phone, to check on the progress of a potential order. No news there and we see him looking crestfallen.

Hayley has read the letter Roy has received and she agrees that he shouldn't stand for it. He agrees he won't - "you know what happened when they tried to put the rent up on Leeds market? Mr Marks wouldn't stand for it and neither would Mr Spencer. This might be just the push I needed to make a fresh start." When Hayley asks what is stopping him, he replies "nothing, except Gail - Stick-in-the-mud - Platt."

Greg's phone rings and when he answers it, it's Sally on the other end. Despite the fact that he is still in the pub, he tells her that he is in a meeting, something cropped up. Mike Baldwin has seen Greg and comes over to have a smirk at Greg's expense. He asks Greg how life is in the fast lane. Greg's reply is that there is a lot happening. "Really?" retorts Mike. He proceeds to rub the salt in the wound by telling him that he had heard he was struggling, and that he is history. He loudly announces to the audience of the factory girls nearby, that if Greg were a machinist, he could offer him a job, "I'm just telling this ex-employee, we've never been so busy." The hurt look on Greg's face shows that Mike has scored a bulls-eye.

At the hospital, Les is proving to be a difficult patient, as Martin is finding out. Les tells Martin that he is ten minutes late - he is supposed to have pain killers every 4 hours, not 4 hours and ten minutes, he tells him, no wonder they are not working. Another patient calls for attention and Martin delegates a junior nurse to attend. Les comments that the other person is probably not in the same amount of pain and wonders whether he is receiving the correct dosage, but Martin confirms that Les is receiving exactly what he has been prescribed. Les points to the patient in the next bed and asks why he is not in pain - because he is on something different, replies Martin. "Exactly, I want what he's getting" says Les, unfortunately, in all seriousness. Martin gives Les his prescribed medicine but Les is not convinced it is doing the trick.

Meanwhile, the other nurse is attending a patient - the man in the adjacent bed, who raised the alarm comments, how his friend felt ill half an hour ago. The nurse checks the man's pulse and realising something is amiss, she urgently calls Martin for attention.

Martin rushes over and, in doing so, is distracted, leaving the medicine trolley unlocked. Les leaps out of bed, helps himself to some tablets from the trolley, swallows them and gets back into bed, without anyone noticing.

Kevin is working on a car in the Garage and Jackie's son, Tyrone, comes along snooping around. When he is challenged by Kevin, he replies that he is just looking around - furthermore, there is nothing in his pockets, as there is nothing worth nicking. When asked, he tells Kevin that he is staying at Deirdre's. He starts discussing the finer points of engines and turbo-diesels and makes out to Kevin that he has a quad bike. Jackie comes over to sees her son with Kevin and butts in to check whether Tyrone is pestering him. When Kevin starts telling her how her son has been discussing his bike, Jackie reveals that he doesn't have a bike at all, in fact, he doesn't even have a pair of roller skates.

In the street, Janice bumps into Sally and tells her that she is sorry things are difficult for her and Greg, right now. She repeats to Sally that Mike Baldwin had been telling Greg, gloating at how they are busy right now at Underworld and how Greg wasn't. Janice lets slip that this was in the pub at lunchtime and, in fact, Greg may still be there. The look on Sally's face is one of realisation that the problem is serious.

Back at home, Nick is still having problems convincing Leanne that all is above board between him and Miranda. She is concerned at the lies he has been telling her about what he has been doing, then she finds out he has been spending his evenings with a middle-aged woman in her house, without his clothes on, of course, she is bound to be suspicious. It would have been different had he told her about it, but he hadn't. Nick tries to explain that he was merely trying to earn some money so he wouldn't have to keep sponging money off Leanne. When she comments that he didn't have to lie about it, his reply is that he didn't because he realises that she wouldn't have let him take the job.

At that point, Ashley wanders in looking for Zoe. Leanne tells him that Ruth had called for her and that Zoe had indicated she would be home late. Ashley is upset and storms out of the house.

At Greg's, Sally ushers the girls into the bedroom, as she hears Greg coming in. She tackles him as to his whereabouts at lunchtime. She asks whether he was in a meeting all day or whether he was at the Rovers. When he admits he popped into the Rovers, she asks whether he was there when she rang him. According to Janice, he was in there all dinner time and all afternoon as well, judging by the smell of him. Greg resents being questioned in this way and tells her he cannot stand being checked up on. She tells him that she phoned him because he said he was coming into the office, she was worried when he hadn't turned up three hours later - for all she knew he had had an accident. She asks what he was doing in the pub anyway and his reply is that he felt rough and needed something to clear his head. He goes to open a bottle and immediately Sally pounces on him, she thought that they had discussed his drinking and that he had promised to cut down. He tells her that he cannot take any more of this nagging. He snaps at her and tells her that her voice is going right through his head. Sally pops her head around the bedroom door and tells the girls to stay in the room. She comes back to tell him that she doesn't want them to hear them squabbling, as they have been through enough already. So has he, is his reply, he complains that she has done nothing but nag at him all day, he asks whether she just cannot shut up for a minute, why doesn't she go and tell her precious girls a bedtime story? She seems to be more bothered by them than about him, he continues, no wonder they whinge all the time, they are just spoilt little brats. He then throws the accusation at her that if she were more bothered about the business, then they would stand a chance. She tells him that the reason the business is going nowhere is because he is all talk, big ideas and nothing else - he is an amateur and he always will be. That is enough for him - he loses his temper and lashes out at her, hitting her in the face. A defining moment has arrived and she tells him that this is the last time he will ever do that to her. He tries to reason with her, but she isn't having any of it. The kids pop their heads around the door again and she goes to join them in the bedroom. Banging on the bedroom door, he yells "is it any wonder I get drunk, your nagging all the time, you and your bloody kids." Inside, Sally is hugging her daughters, crying her eyes out.

Ashley has made his way to the House of Nirab. He finds the front door open and cautiously lets himself in. There doesn't appear to be anyone around, but he hears some music coming from upstairs. Quietly he goes upstairs. There Zoe is undergoing her purification ceremony.

Ben is calling for Zoe to be brought forward. He asks whether she understands the teachings of their founder. When she replies in the affirmative, he asks whether she wishes to become a daughter of Nirab. Again the answer is yes. She wishes to follow his paths for the rest of eternity. Does she wish to be reunited with those who have gone before? Yes, again. "So shall it be" is Ben's command. Zoe is given some robes and changes into them behind a screen.

Ashley pops his head around the door. As the ceremony continues, he sees Zoe embracing Ben and that is too much for him. He rushes forward to try to break up the proceedings. He begs with her to get her coat on and to come with her. He is restrained by some of the other cult members and Ben tells him not to spoil Zoe's big day. Again, Ashley asks Zoe to come with him. Ben tells him that no-one is keeping Zoe against her will. She is free to leave if she likes and if she does, they will not contact her, this is Zoe's decision, not Ashley's nor his. Ashley implores her to come with him - without saying a word, she goes over to Ben and kisses him on his cheek. Upset that Zoe has rejected him in favour of the cult, Ashley storms out of the room.

Back at the hospital, the emergency is over and Martin comes back to attend to Les. It is time to take Les' temperature but Martin is initially oblivious to the fact the Les is sound asleep. This gradually dawns on him after a few seconds of not receiving any response from Les. He suddenly realises that something is seriously wrong and gets the other nurse to call for a doctor urgently.

.....and with that.... it is the cue for music and credits

Episode written by Phil Woods.

All material is, and remains, copyright property of Granada Television.

Well, how was it for me? One of those, "things being brought to a head" episode. We reached the defining moment in the whole sorry Sally/Greg episode where she has had enough, having been the victim once too often of physical abuse from Greg. Not before time. The story still has a while to go as the business ramifications need to be sorted out, but there is no return after tonight. The House of Nirab gets its tentacles into Zoe, who has now made her decision in their favour, against Ashley.

Nick is still struggling to persuade Leanne of the innocence of his relationship with Miranda. Jackie Dobbs and her offspring, Tyrone continue to create hassles for all who come into contact with them. Les' escapade with the drugs backfires on him. I have to say that I am none too impressed with any of those storylines.

What else? Thanks to Roofy for pointing out a continuity error in today's episode. In the previous episode, Zoe tells us she is going to fast for her purification ceremony, but we actually see her innocently scoffing some food during the day. Tsk tsk! I wouldn't have noticed, but then I don't have the skills necessary to join CID (Detective police).

Soooo.... A so-so episode....

Anyway that's it for now.. Until the next time, take care...

Tubby greetings and Tinkyluv from the Tinkster in Glorious Glossop....

Regards, Alan

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Sunday 6 December

So, here we are in December, at last. What happened to Autumn ? I have absolutely no recollection whatsoever of any of those fine, autumnal, days where the ground was dry and the leaves were blowing about and the sun shone, albeit weakly, providing a beautiful spectacle of burnt reds and golds and yellows. Instead ? Cold and miserable and above all, unbelievably wet. We have borrowed one of those leaf blower-cum-sucker-cum-shredder things, and it has sat in my toolroom for weeks in the vain hope that any of the six-inch layer of leaves in the garden is actually going to dry out enough to move about. Some hope. Let's all blame El Nino - it seems to cop for most things.

Sorry if this isn't particularly cheery this week, I've been a bit under the weather with the first of the season's viral whatsits. Friday was a day off work anyway, and I was supposed to be spending the entire weekend with my father getting stuck into decorating the kitchen. Well, that was the plan. The reality was that I flaked out on Friday afternoon, spent the whole of Saturday moving very slowly indeed from bed to sofa to bed again, and only on Sunday did some energy reappear. For about 3 hours. So I sat down to watch tonight's episode of Corrie in a rather drained mood, and at the end of it I felt even worse. The show has rather lost its way at the moment. It was a struggle to stay awake afterwards, but I'm glad I did so, because there's a truly marvellous series on later on Sunday night, by the name of "Cold Feet". It's easily one of the best things on the box at the moment.

I've been putting off writing this update for a couple of days as a result - I keep looking at my notes and no inspiration jumps out at me. Anyway, it's nose to the grindstone time. Sit back, buckle up, and read on...

[Oh, one last thing. If this inspires you to unsubscribe from the corriedays mailing list, please *please* don't reply to me - I don't maintain the list. And especially, don't quote the entire update back at me in the process !!]

On a seasonal note, the Cadbury's chocolate characters are accompanied by gently falling snow this week. Which was quite cute really, because up here in the Weatherfield region, we had our first real snowfall on Sunday night.

Act 1
We open in Animal Hospital, where the Street's resident Rotweiler, RLes, is none too well. We glean this from his gathered family outside the ward, patiently [or in Janice's case, very impatiently] waiting for news from anyone. Toyah and Leanne try to put a cheerful face on things, but Janice is very worried at his sudden turn for the worse. Like many folks, the word "stable" just seems to sound like hospital talk for "we've nothing to tell you that you'd understand or believe".

Returning to the Street, we see the sun is barely up, as Sally and the gurls quietly close the door to Greg's flat. Rosie thinks they are off to Kevin's house, but Sally points them in the direction of the cafe instead. They'll get some tea and toast for their breakfast in there, with Gail.

The floodgates open into Les' ward, and the Battersbys swarm in. They are intercepted by a nurse who advises them that he has only just come round, and that they should take it easy with him and not stay too long. It's clear that Les is only just conscious and can barely respond to Janice and their daughters as they talk to him. [Hey, at least we're safe from Les trying to show any tender emotions...] When the nurse says it's time to go, Janice turns on her and announces she's not leaving until she's had some satisfactory answers. The nurse tells her that the investigation is still on-going.

Roy delivers two cooked breakfasts to a couple of early customers, as Sally arrives with the gurls. She is disappointed to hear that it is Gail's day off, and decides they won't stay after all. Roy subconsciously fingers his left cheek as he asks Sally if everything "is alright ?", noticing the red marks that Greg's hand has left. Sally rushes off in a flurry of excuses.

Time for a visit to the aforementioned Gail's house, where we find Gail bemoaning the fact that she seems to be the only one in the house who is at all interested in going out to buy a Christmas tree that day. We've not seen or heard much from the two kids recently, so it made a pleasant change for Sarah-Louise to be given a brief line today. She announced, in a voice dripping with couldn't-care-less-ness, that she was interested in a tree. [She's reached that magic age, where all talk is conducted while staring at the floor, preferably in a monotone. Emotion is carefully quashed, unless it is being employed to complain about the iniquity of the situation, vis-a-vis the speaker. It can only be a matter of time before Sarah-Lou is banished upstairs forever, condemned to a life of "playing her taaaaaapes".] Where were we ? Oh yes, Martin is mentally elsewhere, worried about Les. He phones the hospital to hear the good news, that Les is recovering, and the bad news, that he is recovering from an overdose.

More angst over at Ashley's house, where he is telling Nick how he followed Zoe to the Foundation house the night before, and had witnessed much of the purification ceremony. Zoe comes in the back door, unnoticed, and overhears the conversation. She interrupts, and Ashley angrily accuses her of snogging that Ben one. She tells him it wasn't like that, and that Ashley simply doesn't understand how important this is to her, and is misreading things. She drops her next bombshell - she will leaving that night to spend a few days in a retreat.

The wandering Websters arrive at Rita's flat. The gurls are sat down in front of the telly, while Rita makes them some breakfast, all the while telling Sally that the failure of her relationship with Greg was pretty much what she had predicted all along. She continues in a cynical, told-you-so vein, until she notices the marks on Sally's face, and is taken aback.

Ashley gets no information from Zoe about how he can get in touch with her - "it's a retreat, Ashley, you're not supposed to let everyone know where it is !". He begs her not to go, but she is adamant. Nirab is visiting the UK, and as the latest convert, she should be there to greet him. [Poor Ashley, and poor Steven Arnold. He seems to be permanently playing worried and concerned, and although he's really convincing, I can't remember the last time the poor lad got to smile !]

More cheeriness [not] over at the corner shop, where Maud greets her first customer of the day, the gruesome Greg. He looks as attractive as ever as he asks for some aspirin. Go on Maud, give him 5 bottles...

Janice makes Les comfy in his bed. [You've got dirty minds, you know that ?!] He tells her she's a champion pillow-plumper. [Oh, just stop it ! I'm only saying it like it is...] Les is feeling quite a bit better, but still not wonderful. Janice accosts the nurse again, to be told that a manager will be down to see her soon. Janice swears she's not leaving until she's had some answers from the staff. Les looks a little uncomfortable when he hears this.

Sally brings some breakfast through to Rita's living room, for the girls. The poor things have fallen asleep in front of the telly, though. She sits down and tells Rita that Greg had never shown any real affection to them, but he'd often suggested they should go and live with Kevin. Rita figures this should have shown Sally what kind of a man he was, but that perhaps it'd be a good idea for them to go to Kevin's for a few days, to give Sally a little time to herself. She can stay there in Rita's flat.

Gail and her two kids are decorating their tree while Martin is still contemplative. Gail can't believe that he's worried for his own sake, surely he was the one who found Les unconscious and saved him anyway. The phone rings - it's the hospital management. They want Martin to come in that evening and tell them "his version of events".

Intermission
Buy early for Christmas !

Act 2
Ashley, still searching for moral support in his crusade against the supporters of Nirab, is talking to Maud in the corner shop. The door opens and in comes Greg, again. The aspirins have lined his stomach, and it's time for a bottle of whisky. "No, make that two !", he says. Maud gives him a sour look as he heads off to drown his sorrows.

Sally and the gurls, who by now look like a small nomadic tribe, have arrived at Kevin's house. Rosie asks if Mummy and Daddy are still friends. Aaah, the innocence of youth. Sally goes through to the kitchen to talk to Kevin. She tells him that it's all over with Greg, and that she needs Kevin to look after the girls for a few days. He looks vaguely insulted that she should even have to ask - of course he'll take his own kids in for as long as she needs. Like everyone else Sally has spoken to, it's not long before he notices the marks on her cheek, and demands to know if Greg was responsible. Sally unconvincingly denies it, and says she has to be getting away before Kevin has time to make an issue of it.

[Brace yourselves - six-pack alert...] Time for a trip to the college now, where Nick's art teacher is giving some of the students some advice before break-time. As they disperse, Leanne appears down a staircase, where it appears she has been watching proceedings for some time. She approaches Miranda, the art teacher, and tells her she would like to join up as a female model ! [Down, Plowman, down !]

Martin is being interviewed by the senior nurse manager. He explains what had happened on the ward, when he'd instructed the other nurse to attend to another patient while he gave Les his painkillers. This wasn't the correct procedure, where two nurses should have witnessed patients receiving their medication. Martin protests that quite often they have to do the rounds on their own, out of necessity, but his boss appears to be more concerned about covering the hospital than in defending Martin. He says he can only see 3 ways that Les took an overdose - either Martin made a mistake, the other nurse made a mistake, or Les got hold of the extra tablets himself.

Ben has arrived to take Zoe away to the retreat. Ashley is trying desperately to persuade her not to go - he offers to take her away for a weekend himself, if it's the break she needs. Ben tells Ashley not to be so suspicious about the Foundation, and they leave. Ashley looks tormented by his inability to get through to Zoe.

Leanne is walking around the art class, examining many of the sketches, while Nick looks embarrassed by her interference. She tells Miranda that she'd come down to check there was nothing mucky going on. Miranda shows her more sketches and asks her if they look at all tacky. Leanne says not. But then, they're not *him*, are they ? But yes, they are, Leanne. Deflating, Leanne admits that some of them are quite good, and points to one in particular. Her humiliation is complete when she learns that this is one of the teacher's own works, which is then presented to her as a gift, signed and dated as an original.

The vino is flowing at Rita's, where she and Sally are having a drink. Rita tells Sally she is glad she is thinking straight, for once. Anyway, she still has her Mum's inheritance to help set her up. Sally's face gives the game away - most of it has gone on the business. "Oh, Sally !", says Rita.

Back to Weatherfield General for one final visit tonight, where Martin has realised that he left the medicine trolley unlocked during the emergency in the ward. That's obviously how Les got the extra tablets. But his relief is short-lived when his manager tells him that he should contact his union representative immediately, because the hospital have no choice but to suspend him from duty, pending the outcome of the investigation.

This episode was written by Maureen Chadwick.

It wasn't very cheery, was it ? Unremitting gloom from start to finish, I thought. Sally is hope^H^Hmeless, Martin's in trouble, Ashley is depressed, Zoe is nearly lost to the cause, Greg is drinking. Unseen, Deirdre is still putting up with Jackie and her son, Natalie is still in denial over Tony's involvement in Des' death, and Roy is in turmoil over the future of the cafe.

It's grim oop North, ain't it ?

Overall rating (out of 5 stars): **

I hope to be back on a more timely schedule next week, although it's going to be a bit of a rush as Mrs L is out of the country for the weekend, having a grand jolly at her employer's expense, while I am on child-minding duty. The kids are usually no trouble, but I do find being a taxi and meals service a bit wearing after a while !

See you next week, and take care, John Laird

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Monday 7 December

Yup, once again it's Update time but it really will be an ultra-brief, slapdash effort this week. I'm quite bogged under with stuff to do at the present moment (well, 'tis the Season to be busy, et al) and, frankly, this episode doesn't even warrant more than a paragraph at best. I felt like I was watching some hideously overblown American Soap in which every storyline was about as far removed from reality as Dr Timothy Leary. Drugs, murder, beatings, abuse, medical malpractice, strange religious cults... *yawn* While I understand that times are indeed tougher than ever for the production team right now what with half the cast leaving etc, and I acknowledge that Corrie *has* been making a steady rise in the last couple of weeks with some excellent scenes, but tonight's Monday show was just atrociously pitiful. (Apologies if it seems I'm saying this every week atm! I'm not, honest!)

Scene one starts as badly as the episode means to go on. The set looks gloomy and you'd have more chance of finding a smile on death row. A bruised Sally has come to pick the gurrls up from Kevin's house in order to take them to school. He wonders aloud about what she's going to do in the future, whether or not she's going back to Greg and then continues to press her for details of her bruise. She refuses to admit that she was beaten and then Kevin, tactful as ever, tells her he feels sorry for Blandford as they're "both in the same boat... Sally Webster's rejects"! Then he tells her that if he hears that Greg has so much as laid a finger on the gurrls, he'll "kill him"... (Somewhere along the space/time continuum, someone appears to be actually moving Weatherfield *closer* to Albert Square at a rapid rate...)

Over in the Hospital (always a great place for a laugh... or not) Janice is visiting Les and looking very concerned about his condition. He tells her that someone is coming down to the ward to question him later that day to find out "what really happened" regarding his recent overdose. He also swears up and down that Nurse Platt was "negligent" and, needless to say, Janice, visibly softened by the shock of the whole string of events, believes every word.

Conviniently, we cut to the Platt household next where a tense Martin confides his worries to Gail about his suspension and berates himself for leaving the drugs trolley unlocked. Obviously, she is supportive (well, to the extent of sighing "Oooh, Martin" over and over) but he seems utterly gutted, convinced that he'll lose his job when Les starts inevitably spouting lies about the whole affair.

Fred and Maud, meanwhile, swap an amusing bit of banter in the Cornershop about Zoe and the Nirab Retreat Party. He wonders what a "retreat" is all about and when Maud explains it's where "they've got nowt better to do with their time so they sit around thinking about why we're here and where we're going next", he states, confusedly, "I do that meself... Mostly in the company of a bottle of Scotch, I don't have to go up a mountain to do it"! Natalie approaches the counter with a basket of groceries and Fred offers her some complimentary steak from his Butchers' Shop to help her keep her protein up, assuring that she "won't get over her loss with lentils and brocolli"! She politely (and wisely) declines Fred's free steak.

"HELLO ALEC!" proclaim Rita and Sally in unison, "Cheers!"-style, as the Rovers' Landlord enters The Big Red's Flat. They're both glad he's here because Sally needs some "business advice" or more specifically she wants to know how to terminate the partnership between her and Blandford Enterprises with a minimal amount of financial loss. His suggestion is that she "moves quicker than he does", get all the standing orders stopped asap and take back all the stock from the office since it, rightfully, belongs to her as long as she can get it and sell it before the Bland One does. (Is it good advice? Is it legal? Do I care?)

Back at the Hospital, the Senior Nursing Manager has come to question Les about the overdose. He asks Les to tell him "in his own words" exactly what happened and of course, the Beligerent Battersby lies through his teeth and claims that he just naively took the pills that Martin gave him, had no idea that the dosage was too high and then even so much as goes on to suggest quite adamantly that he thinks Platty was trying to *kill him* because of the 'disputes' about the Platt son marrying the Battersby daughter... Gawd.

Kevin meanwhile is talking to Martin in the Rovers, confessing to be secretly very happy that Sally's relationship with Greg has fell to pieces and that he's got the kids back... Across the bar, Fred, Audrey and Maxine are ribbing Alec about the physical side of his relationship with Rita and, as part of his protestation that there is no hanky-panky going on, he tells them that Sally Webster is staying there right now... Quick cut back to the other side of the bar, where Janice lays briefly into Martin about the state of her husband, expressing her desire that a "proper investigation" be conducted. *yawn*

Colin Barnes, he of the undefinable (and rather irritating) accent, knocks on Natalie's door, claiming he has some "unfinished business". She reluctantly lets him inside. Cue commercial break.

END OF PART ONE
Nothing new from the ads I'm afraid. Lots of Yuletide offers, mind you. Frozen prawns at 2 for the price of 1 in Tesco (wouldn't Spider Nugent be pleased to hear that, eh? ;)), a diabolical couple of cash-cow-milking Greatest Hits albums from 'artists' who wouldn't even know how to so much as spell "Great" without the help of their marketing plebs, extra-value whipped cream for your Christmas trifles, that bloody Boots advert again with the Miranda Peters lookalike and finally cheap telly rentals at Curry's Electrical Stores. Then it's back to the 'fun'...

PART TWO
Colin is wittering blandly (not to mention with some of the most pathetic dialogue delivery this side of Adam Rickitt) about how he thought everyone at Des' funeral knew "the truth" about his death and the drug connection. This was why he threw a fit and got so angry. He goes on to plead with Natalie to go to the police, for Des' sake, and tell the truth about Tony's drug dealing and all the rest of that dreary crud that I thought we'd got rid of weeks ago. She is adamant that she *IS* telling the truth (but we know better...) and refuses to budge on it.

Somewhere on the streets of Weatherfield, Greg tries to withdraw money from a hole-in-the-wall using Sally's cashcard, but to no avail. The machine chews it up whole but unfortunately spares *him*... Meanwhile Sally and The Big Red One shift boxes of fabric stock out of his office.

Oh, and we're back at Natalie's... Oh, and it's still the same conversation I described a couple of sentences ago. Oh, I'm asleep. Colin storms out and threatens to tell the police *himself* since she won't do it.

Les, meanwhile, rambles away uninterestingly from his hospital bed to Janice about the visit from the Senior Nursing Manager and about how Martin "tried to kill him" (In fact, in all the scenes that he's been in this episode, Les has said very little except for the same line recycled again and again) before enthusing that he's going to get some major compensation for this and make sure the hospital pays.

In the poxy offices of Blandford Enterprises, Greg returns to find all his stock has vanished. Sally, meanwhile, arranges over the 'phone, from within Rita's flat, for the rental companies to pick up all Greg's computer equipment too before suggesting that she and Big Red go over to the old flat and pick up the rest of the stock he's keeping in there to boot.

The police show up at Natalie's and tell them that they've been visited by Colin who told his side of the story. Natalie tells them that it's all a load of rubbish, that Colin's a nutcase and, when they ask to speak to Tony, she claims she has no idea where in London he's presently living.

Back at the Big Red Flat, about a dozen boxes of fabric have been shifted from Greg's flat (eh?!?! Where was he storing these exactly!?!) and Sally is relieved that she's slowly but surely getting revenge on him. Rita quickly nips across the road to lock up the Kabin...

Fred, who is the sole shining light in this episode, is lurking around the shop chatting to Maud as he wants to take Ashley (whom he refers to as "Weary Willy"!!! The only decent line in the whole show!) for a drink to cheer him up. Greg enters, highly irritated, and demands that Fred changes the locks on his flat to keep Sally out. A conviniently nearby Maxine starts gloating about the failure of the Bland One's latest venture and, mid-gloat, accidentally lets it slip that the Silly One is staying at Rita Sullivan's. Greg grins evilly in a B-Movie Villain-esque way.

In The House Of Elliot, Ashley bemoans life in general, wailing about how upset he is that Zoe has gone on this retreat with the Nutters of Nirab. Leanne reckons he should kick her out the house for good but Ashley, who is truly devastated, wants things to just go back to how they were, Pre- Foundation. Lee gets sick of this mopery within a minute or so and says she's going to visit her dad in hospital. Nick declines (as he wouldn't want to be seen to "taking sides" against Martin) and gets an earful of abuse for his trouble.

In a ridiculously dumb scene, the doorbell rings at Rita's and Sally, naturally assuming it's Big Red herself, lets the door open. Oh no, it's Gruesome Greg and he's looking to slap her silly! Luckily, Rita shows up just as Blandford finishes his B-Movie threats with "You're an evil little bitch!" and she throws him out of the flat. He claims that they'll all finish their "little chat" some other time and leaves with all the precense of a deeply contrived horror film bad-guy. Sad. Credits roll, Praise Nirab!

As you can tell by the tone of this Update (which I won't lower myself to again), I was horrified by the dire state of the episode. For me, the reason why I watch Corrie and don't tend to bother with any of the other soaps is because it's always has a certain quaint side to it, an endearing nature and the ability to warm the cockles of the heart et al. Tonight's show was as quaint as Piccadilly Circus, as endearing as Tony Blair and about as warm as a cryogenic chamber. As I said at the start, it played like an American soap, all over-the-top, unsympathetic characters and absurdly implausible plot twists.

But I'm not going to dwell on it. I'll just hope for the best in coming episodes and leave on a good note, with a friendly reminder that this coming weekend is the date of the Christmas Mini-Ping in Manchester, which of course is the Yuletide little get-together of Corrie net-fans. If you're interested in coming (or just interested in seeing a particularly well-designed website with lots of piccies and info about Manchester on it!) take a look at http://www.coronation-street.freeserve.co.uk/xmas98/ where you'll find all the details about where, when, who and what it's all about. :)

Til next time, take care!

The Rattler

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Wednesday 9 December

It's that time again... And as splendid a time to stay indoors and do the update as it's been raining pretty solidly here for two days, it's December with a vengeance, Christmas is almost upon us and I really ought to stir myself to do something about it. I don't know about you - I hate the run-up the Christmas with the crowds and the tacky music in all the shops. But actually I do like the day itself, very much. Everything is suddenly so quiet, and very peaceful. Anyway, enough of this because I have another update to do before the big day, so I'm being premature.

Oh, I just thought I'd remark that the Street got an honourable mention in the course of my civic duties - yesterday as I was doing my monthly stint as Chair of Central Area Planning Committee, an officer mentioned that somebody has been stealing the granite setts from Gas Ferry Road, where the major Harbourside development is going on. A giggle and a mutter of "Les Battersby!" from the public gallery.

For those who look to the Street for safe reassurance and warm Lancashire humour, there can have been little comfort in this rather intensely bleak and desolate episode, I can only hope for their sake that we get another good wedding before long. But John Stevenson's script stands up very well, balancing some very heavy, and meaty scenes with just enough lightness to relieve without diminishing the seriousness. I thought this was a pretty good one anyway.

The star performance was certainly that of Denise Welch, who was quite stunning. I have mixed feelings about Lee Warburton as Tony, the character is unlikeable, shifty, deceitful, self-deluding, and above all very, very weak. I guess an actor relishes strong roles, but to carry off such a weak character so strongly must require a special talent, I think Lee should be given the benefit of the doubt. He certainly comes across as perfectly odious.

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Friday 11 December

Hiya folks!!!! ... Time again for another update.... Tinky productions apologise for the slightly late arrival of this update, on account of me being just a bit pinged out. Too much booze, too little sleep, same old story, I know!!! In terms of Ping Reports, I won't steal Annie's thunder, I'll delay my report until she has posted hers, suffice to say, a superb weekend was had in the presence of some lovely company.

The Christmas season is in full swing at Trude's place with the build up to the Carol Concerts and Nativity Plays to be held this coming week. Highlight comment has to go to a youngster in the Nursery - the Headteacher had told the kids the nativity story and was testing their understanding of it all. "So children", she says, "whose birthday do we celebrate at Christmas?" This little four year old sticks her hand up and excitedly proclaims "Mine Miss, and I get lots and lots of presents!!" There ain't nothing like the natural innocent humour of youngsters.

Well, how was it for me? A really good episode in my book.

Some great dialogue and amazingly brilliant and bitchy one-liners - well done, scriptwriter, Phil Ford.

Some magic light comedy provided by Fred and Alec - those guys really are stars, wonderful lines, great delivery, impeccable timing and the facial expressions, well, out of this world. Beautiful stuff.

In terms of drama and emotion, superb stuff from Ashley, full of despair at losing Zoe to the cult. For me though, Denise Welch as Natalie Barnes shone again, with an exceptional performance in her interchange with Tony. In her, we really have an amazing actress with real class and ability. Bravo!!!

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Sunday 13 December

Well, last week's promise to turn up on time this week fell at the first hurdle, or more precisely it keeled over when leaving the starting gates. Once again, my apologies for the late arrival of this service - it's bad enough trailing in after The Rattler's Monday update without being passed by Rosalind's Wednesday epistle. And she writes about 3 times as much as I do.

It's not been a wonderful week, this week. I am looking forward to starting afresh after the weekend. It has been 5 long days of hassle with two cars and a house. Fortunately, most things seem to be back in working order, but the wear and tear on me may take longer to heal. Why does everything break at the same time, and why is this time immediately before Christmas, truly one of the busiest periods ?

So, let's get straight on with the update, which may be even shorter than usual this week. As the signature tune draws to a close, I note we have a new typeface for the program title. Whatever next ? That new-fangled colour stuff, perhaps ?

I really have to post this and rush off home, so I'll just quickly add that this was a somewhat better episode tonight, and there's better still to come. In particular, we are about to see some terrific stuff from Steven Arnold, who plays an increasingly distraught Ashley. I think he's really excellent, especially considering he is probably only about 20 - I mean, at that age, how can he summon up such despair ? Ah, but wait, inspiration strikes ! He must be a Man City fan !

And on that slight spoiler, I'll leave you.

Overall rating (out of 5 stars): ***

One more Sunday episode before Christmas !

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Monday 14 December

Well, folks, it's Update time again and it really seems like far more than a week ago since I did my last one. Aside from suffering from a couple of viruses (computer and healthwise!) it's been mostly a rather fab one too, culminating in great style with the most excellent Xmas Mini-Ping in Manchester on the weekend which, no doubt, RATUCS/Guestbook readers will have already read about from pens far mightier than my own. So rather than retread their steps I'll simply thank *everyone* who was there profusely for making it a night to remember indeedy and leap straight into this week's Monday Update, a marked improvement over the last couple of episodes, too, I should add!