Hi everyone, here is the first episode of the evening.

We open with Janice and Les, in the street, sharing a ciggie. Karen comes along and comments that itâs very romantic. Janice tells her they have no choice, theyâre skint. Karen offers to lend Janice a fiver but Les wonât let her, he tells Karen itâs his job to provide, and heâs got an airport run first thing. Janice looks very disappointed.

Tracy and the baby have turned up yet again at Ciaranâs flat. Heâs getting himself all dressed up in suit and tie. ÎAre you up in court?â asks Tracy. He tells her heâs got a meeting. Tracy reckons itâs a meeting with several women, and that heâs a gigolo, comforting desperate old women in return for cash. He hints that sheâs getting close to the truth.

Penny and Mike are in the cafŽ, eating breakfast. Mike asks if she fancies lunch, but she refuses. He then tells her that a Îlittle birdâ has told him sheâs been spending a lot of time with a certain Irishman. ÎWho?â asks Penny, all innocently. ÎCiaran McCarthyâ Mike tells her. ÎOh, the lad behind the bar,â exclaims Penny, and says she might have got chatting when she was having a drink. She wants to know who has told him, but Mike isnât saying. She tells him sheâs not having an affair, she knows thatâs what heâs thinking, although of course, Mike denies thinking any such thing. He changes the subject and asks if sheâll come to Spain with him but she tells him it depends on whether heâs going to get all suspicious on her. ÎFor someone who thinks commitment only happens in a mental institution,â she tells him, Îyou can be very clingy.â

Jamie is mopping the factory floor, as the girls wonder what he looks like without his top on. They try telling him that Harry usually works without his top on, so he tells them that if they do their sewing without their tops on, theyâve got a deal. Harry comes in and is aghast to see what Jamie is doing and asks who told him to do it. ÎI did,â says Danny, coming out of his office. Harry complains that heâs not using the right cleaning solution, thereâs no sign up warning of a hazardous surface, and his action is all over the place. Danny hands Harry back the mop and goes off in a strop, as Harry bemoans the fact that none of the cleaning products are in their right places.

Hayley and Roy are driving up the street in their camper van, returning from their holiday. They donât appear to be getting on too well and Hayley is snapping at Roy. Eventually she shouts at him to get out of the van, and looking most offended, Roy does so. She gets out a moment later and scuttles round to where he is standing. ÎRoy·â she begins, ÎBog off!â snaps Roy, Hayley is quite taken aback. ÎYou see,â he says, ÎI can be angry, and rude.â Hayley apologises for being on a short fuse for the last couple of days, but he tells her sheâs been on a short fuse since they hit the road. She tells him it hasnât all been plain sailing, ÎDriving,â he corrects her. She tells him once they have had a nice hot bath and a good nightâs sleep in their own bed they will be able to put the whole wretched experience behind them.

Mike is just crossing the street when he sees Ciaran greet Penny outside the corner shop. He watches with interest as Penny looks at the bunches of flowers and tells Ciaran that Mike is watching them and to pretend he is buying something. Ciaran picks up a bunch of flowers and remarks that he feels like a spy. He wants to know whether their meeting is still on today. ÎYes,â she says as she goes inside to pay for the flowers, Îbook the table and text me.â

Roy and Hayley carry an old railway signal into the cafŽ, and Roy tells Vera that they bought it at a sale of railway memorabilia. Hayley forces a wide smile and tells Vera that she thinks itâs wonderful and she was completely supportive of Royâs decision to transport it 300 miles. Vera wonders why they are back, she thought theyâd be gone for weeks. They tell her they thought theyâd have a number of little adventures, rather than one big one.

Mike walks into the factory and over to the office where Danny is fiddling with the chair. Mike tells him he canât get used to someone else sitting in his chair. Danny says he canât get used to the chair, the lumbar support is a joke and the height adjustment sticks. Danny tells Mike heâs planning some changes, Mike tells him to go ahead, from now on they can do everything his way. Just then Penny walks in, complete with flowers. She has brought some numbers of contacts, suppliers, customers etc. over. Mike is flabbergasted, she never gave him any useful numbers. She says sheâs just lending a hand to the new kid on the block. Sheâs also brought over a new spreadsheet programme and goes off to put it on the pc. Mike tells Danny they are rivals, they should be stabbing each other in the back. Danny tells him itâs the 21st century, businesses cooperate. Just then Pennyâs phone, in her bag which she has left on the desk, makes a noise. Mike quickly takes a peek and sees that itâs a text message from Ciaran, ÎNexus 1pm Câ it reads. Now itâs Dannyâs turn to be horrified at Mike, for rummaging in a womanâs handbag and reading her text messages.

Sally rushes across the street waving a letter and shouting, ÎWe did it! Sheâs in! Oakhill have offered her a place.â Kevin looks up from under the bonnet of the car heâs fixing. Heâs not that impressed, he thinks they would let anyone in who stumped up enough cash. His daughter hasnât taken an exam or even had an interview, but Sally tells him there is a 2yr waiting list with 100 names on it. ÎSo what did you do?â he asks, Îpin the poor headmaster against the wall or summat?â Sally tells him not be daft, but seems evasive.

A smart red sports car turns into the street, and drives up behind Les who is walking along. The driver hoots, and stops, and gets out in front of Les. Itâs Cilla, dressed up like a well padded Marilyn Monroe in a chiffon scarf, sunglasses, plunge neck top and tight white trousers. Les asks where she got it. ÎItâs mine,â she purrs, ÎI was all for getting something more practical, Îatchback maybe·.â She then goes on to tell Les she hasnât come to cause trouble, she just wants to pick up the last of her stuff. Les nearly chokes on his pie·.

Break

Les and Janice are in the house, he tells her they gave her clothes and jewellery to charity. He tells her that she looks like she can afford more. ÎThatâs not the point,â she tells him, Îsome of that jewellery had sentimental value.â She asks whatâs happened to her passport, but Les didnât know it was there. She tells him itâs in the cupboard and goes to look for it.

Ciaran and Penny are at a restaurant when Mike walks in and acts all surprised at seeing them. ÎWell, well, well!â he says. Penny asks what heâs doing there, he tells her heâs having lunch and sits down. He wants to know what is going on, and Penny tells him that they are having a business meeting. Mike obviously doesnât believe that, until Ciaran tells him that they are buying the restaurant. Mikeâs face drops somewhat, and Penny tells him that they need to be alone, they have quite a lot to discuss.

Cilla is turning Lesâs house upside down looking for her passport. She tells him sheâs going to take Chesney to Disneyland. Les asks how he is, and says that Cilla should have brought him round. She says itâs best not to confuse the lad. Les asks if sheâs won the lottery, but she tells him that her Auntie Di has died, and she dabs her eyes with a tissue. It appears that on her deathbed she told Cilla she wanted her to have Tara. ÎWhoâs Tara?â demands Les. Cilla explains that itâs the houseâs nickname, on account of it being so big. (I rather think this explanation is lost on Les who has obviously never read ÎGone with the Wind.â)

In the Rovers, the factory girls are having a drink, Hayley included. They think she must be keen coming back to work on the day sheâs come back from her holiday. She says sheâs come in for the company as much as anything. Angie remarks that itâs not easy spending a long time with just one person, and Hayleyâs expression seems to agree.

Ciaran and Penny walk in, and shake hands on their new deal, which Mike sees. Liz looks Ciaran up and down and asks if heâs been up in court. He doesnât seem amused. Penny goes and sits down with Mike, who asks if sheâs finished her meeting, if thatâs what it was, and not just a ploy to put him off the scent. She tells him sheâs flattered that he thinks she could pull a toy boy like Ciaran McCarthy. Mike tells her she lied to him, but she says she didnât, she told him he had nothing to worry about, which was true. They have a somewhat heated debate on their respective business dealings, and who tells who what. She thinks the whole thing is a very good proposition, but Mike thinks sheâs a fool. ÎYou sure thereâs nothing going between you two? Youâve got the form.â He tells her she had an affair with him for long enough, so he knows sheâs capable.

Harry is talking to Roy in the cafŽ, wishing he could do what they did, find a new challenge and break out of his shell.

Sally and Kevin are also in the cafŽ, talking to Rosie. ÎArenât you excited?â asks Sally. Rosie assures her sheâs completely calm, sheâs not going to a school full of rich ponces. She storms out, but Sally is sure sheâll come round, and itâs just nerves. Kevin isnât so sure, but Sally tells him she wonât let her chuck away an opportunity like this. Kevin is still puzzling over how Rosie was offered a place anyway, especially when there is a waiting list. Sally just tells him she can be very persuasive.

Harry is telling Roy he would like to follow his example. Roy thinks heâs making him sound like Marco Polo, they didnât really venture that far. Harry tells him heâs not happy with the new regime at the factory and itâs time he did something drastic.

Mike and Penny are still in the pub. ÎIf Iâm not to be trusted,â says Penny, Îdoes that mean youâre not to be trusted? You were having the affair too.â She wonders at all the times he couldnât wait to get her out of the flat, and thereâs all the times heâs said heâs playing golf. Heâs convinced she was trying to make him jealous. She says she wishes sheâd thought of it, it worked a treat. She wonders how he knew about the lunch meeting with Ciaran in the restaurant, and in the end he tells her he read her text message. She is outraged, and tells him she loves making him jealous but sheâs not going to go out with a stalker, heâs gone from one extreme to the other.

Over at the Battersbyâs, Cilla is telling Les she hasnât actually got the money yet, it still has to be processed. ÎHalf a million!â says Les, ÎThatâs a lot of dough.â Cilla tells him it doesnât bother her, sheâs never been materialistic. (!) ÎBesides,â she goes on, Îitâs not as if Iâve got anyone to share it with.â Les tells her there will be plenty of fellas about once they find out sheâs worth a bob or two. ÎAll the money in the world canât buy Îappiness,â she pouts. She decides to get going, sheâs promised Chesney a lobster for his tea.

Outside, Fizz comes round the corner and sees Les and her mother looking at the sports car. Les tells Fizz that Cilla has come into money. Fizz wants to know where from and Cilla tells her sheâs inherited it from an auntie. ÎSheâll be writing me begging letters in a weekâs time,â she tells Les, and then says he can sit in the car. Les gets in and Fizz walks off.

In the factory, Harry has arrived to see Danny. Harry starts to tell Danny that heâs leaving, but before he can finish Danny tells him heâs letting him go.

Fizz tells Janice that the car outside her house is Cillaâs, and it looks like sheâs just about to whisk Les off in it.

Patrick has just pulled his taxi up behind the sports car, and Vera gets out. ÎBlimey,â she says, Îlook at them two!â ÎFancy a spin?â Cilla asks Les, ÎDead right I do,â he replies, putting on his seat belt. As they drive off, Janice runs up behind. ÎWait! Wait!â she yells, and then jumps into Patrickâs taxi. ÎIâm off duty now,â he protests. ÎNo yer not,â she tells him, Îfollow that car!â

And thatâs it for this episode.

Annie Logan

Ah, the open road, Geena Davis at the wheel . . . Oh, itâs only Cilla. Still, I suppose we can all hope she does drive into a large hole in the ground! Les is next to her and Cilla tells him heâs getting a glimpse of the good life, and itâll give him a good memory he can treasure.

In the factory, Fizz is asking Hayley when she and Roy will be off on their travels again. Hayley explains that Roy likes to meander about the countryside making sure they donât miss a good view or an architectural gem. The upshot being that going the 50 miles from A to B turns out to be more like 150 miles, and itâs Hayley who is doing the driving. She gets to see some lovely views, but only through the windscreen. Fizz says it must be nice not to have to hunt for a bed for the night. Oh yes, says Hayley, itâs right there behind your seat, along with the luggage, the kitchen sink and the chemical toilet (Only the Croppers would have a Kombi van with a chemical toilet ö I lived in a Kombi for a summer in Europe and never saw one with such a device). Hayley changes the subject and says Janice is a long time in the toilet. ãIs she all right?ä Fizz reveals that Jan is actually in Patrickâs taxi, following that car.

And there she is, insisting they carry on, no matter how much Patrick protests and suggests they head back. The wimp even refuses to run a red light for Janice.

Ciaran is rapidly discovering the downside of being friendly to Tracey. As he returns the place looks like a play centre and Tracey appears to have started putting in a sand pit. ãItâs not sand, itâs crushed rusk,ä Tracey points out. Ciaran tells her about the Nexus wine bar and his plans to run it as a restaurant, with Penny Kingâs money. But Tracey firmly believes Penny must be Ciaranâs sleeping partner in every sense of the word. She asks Ciaran to do her a favour and look after the baby for a few minutes.

Back at the factory, a very grumpy Jamie is cleaning windows. Part of his management training, his father tells him. Harry comes in for his pay and the girls are all for a ãgo-slowä in support of him, but Harry tells them not to bother. Heâs actually quite pleased to have lost the job. And when he collects his pay thereâs a bonus there from Mike, in thanks for his help with ãa Mr Kingä, Danny tells him.

Cilla has found a quiet, shady spot on a quiet street and parks the car. ãWeâve got to talk,ä she tells Les, whipping off her scarf in dramatic fashion.

In the pub, Shelly and Liz are teasing Mike about his having more free time these days. Fred comes in and Mike offers him and drink and tells him that Ciaran and Penny are just business partners. He points out that itâs more a problem for Fred than for him. ãIf it gets off the ground, youâll be looking for a new barman.ä

We move now to the garage, when Tommy is supervising a small bus backing into the working bay. What a coincidence! Itâs from Oak Hill School! Tommy tells Kevin that theyâll be doing the maintenance on it from now on. Itâs all been organised by Sally.

Back in the car in the quiet, shady spot on a quiet street, Cilla is talking about timing. If she and Les had still been together when she came into money, he could have benefited. Les is still cynical. Cilla tells him that happiness is worth more than money. ãWithout you to share it with, what use is a load of money to me?ä She admits she will spend it anyway, ãtrying to forget.ä Suddenly, they are both falling backwards. The car has a button to recline both front seats at once, it seems. Cilla pounces on Les and it seems all his resistance has gone.

[break]

At the Webstersâ, Sally is telling Kevin that servicing the school bus was too good a chance to miss. Er . . . but then she admits sheâs agreed the garage will do the work for free. ãSo thatâs how you got me into that school!ä an aggrieved Rosie shouts. Though Sally insists they would have taken Rosie anyway.

In the quiet, shady spot on a quiet street, a noisy, fuming Janice-in-a-taxi pulls up! Patrick advises Janice not to do anything sheâd regret, but Jan insists it wonât be her who is regretting anything. And just after Cilla purrs ãOooh, baby, do you want me?ä there comes a shout of ãWell?! Do you, baby!??ä (I make no apologies for the extra punctuation ö Les sat up so fast he would have been concussed if it wasnât a convertible car) ãItâs not what it looks like,ä he says, once the power of speech returns. Janice spells out exactly what she thinks of Les, and berates herself for believing he was sincere when he begged her to go back to him. ãMore fool me,ä she says. As they shout at each other, a calm Cilla is applying lippy to her smirk in the background. ãI donât want her, I want you!ä Les pleads. ãIt was a mistake.ä Jan is not convinced. It wasnât a mistake because he knew what he was doing, she says, telling him they are finished. And with dignity she marches back to the taxi and Patrick drives her away.

Tracey returns to Ciaranâs flat to discover him napping with the baby lying in his arms. He insists he wasnât asleep, but he seems to have enjoyed the time with the wee one and says that in a couple of years heâll be able to play games with Amy, ãand any other games you fancy.ä

In the pub, Harry is at the bar when Mike comes in and Harry tells him that had not been given a chance since Frankie arrived and took a dislike to him. Mike offers to have a word, but Harry is quite pleased to be free. They are interrupted by Pennyâs arrival. Liz asks Harry about getting the sack, but Harry insists heâs pleased to be free. At a table, Mike asks Penny if sheâd like to go to Spain with him and he agrees. Then he asks her to give up the plan to back Ciaran. ãThe restaurant business is dodgy territory,ä he says. But Penny insists she will go ahead.

Back in the not-so-quiet, shady spot on what used to be a quiet street, Les has lost a shoe. He refuses Cillaâs pleadings and wonât get back in the car. He doesnât care if sheâs on offer because he wants Janice. He tells her he will walk home. ãBut itâs miles!ä she says. ãThen Iâd best get started,ä he replies, and limps off, still without one shoe.

In the cafe, which is closed, Roy has spread out a map of the Scottish Highlands and is talking about their next trip. On the wall behind him are several bits of railway nostalgia, which I canât remember noticing before, including the signal. Roy mentions they will have to get the chemical loo fixed, because they donât want another flood. And then, in a speech which will probably haunt the Scottish tourist board for years, he describes a midge attack, claiming people run screaming into the nearest loch. ãNow weâve got something to look forward to,ä he says. Hayley expresses her doubts. Sheâd rather see places closer to home. And it would be nice to go on the train so she didnât have to drive. Roy agrees. Hmm. Seems like there might be a Kombi campervan up for sale soon. Now, who do we know who now has no ties to Weatherfield and who finds the idea of a wandering life attractive?

In the Street, Janice is busy loading her stuff into the boot of Patrickâs car. She tells him to take her to Leeanneâs place, where she used to live.

In the pub, we find a man who now has no ties to Weatherfield and is free to wander. But if Harry drove a Kombi now heâd be arrested immediately. The beers and whisky chasers have done their work and Fred refuses to serve him any more. (Harry is an excellent drunk -- I enjoyed the acting of Iain Rogerson very much in this scene). Heâs decided that his nickname is not ãHalf-mast Harryä but ãEasy Harryä. Eileen certainly finds him easy to lead as she takes him home for a meal and a lot of coffees. ãIâve never been the worse for drink,ä Harry says. ãIâve been the better for it a few times, and this is one of those times.ä

On a road far, far away, Les limps along. A convertible pulls up beside him and Cilla tries to tempt him with his other shoe. She asks where heâs going to find any love and comfort and promises him good times. Itâs only when she promises he can drive the car that Les suddenly changes his mind and positively skips round the car to get in beside her. ãLetâs you and me go home,ä she purrs, and the car take off with a squeal of tyres.

The End.

Margaret Carr

Updates always used to be written with a brief note from the updater about his week, just to insert a little personal identification. My last week has been the same as the last few months - coping with new systems at work and nothing to set the inner man alight. Much of it comes from doing the same job for nearly 15 years - I think I have just run out of ideas! Anyway I sense change on the horizon and so perhaps things will be different soon!

And it is good evening from me and my friends in Weatherfield provided copyright of ITV TV, written by Catherine Hayes, directed by Kay Patrick and sponsored by Cadbury's Roses. We lose (in my opinion) an under used and under-rated character tonight.

Fred is telling Ashley that he must tell Joshua the truth - the foundations should be laid now - but Ashley disagrees. Later Fred repeats his opinion again - Fred can understand why Claire is upset but he cannot understand Ashley view, (Joshua has been calling Claire "Mummy", no doubt what he has heard at playgroup). Claire and Joshua come into the shop and he is taken through the back by his grandfather. Claire can sense the atmosphere and she has come up with a spurious explanation of the problem. Anyway she has decided to accept Ashley's decision. Ashley wants to keep things the way they are.

Harry is being hold - he has no time for anything else. He wants Eileen to go with him - he is lonely, he likes her and there has to be more to life than the last two years and if he lets the chance slip it may never happen. He wants to do 20,000 miles with her, so they can find out about each other. He tells her that he finds her attractive - and wants to see the sights with her. She wants more time to decide - he is convinced they would be good together.

Along at the Battersbys Les has given up his job and Cilla is not going to give her up job just yet - at least not until the money is in the account. As Kirk observes, do not count your chickens until they have crossed the road, Chesney corrects him and then gets a telling off from Cilla for almost announcing there is no money really. According to Les Cilla is better than Bonnie Tyler, Suzi Quattro and Jordan put together (and if you don't know who they are then I can assure you that Les is very, very wrong).

Les and Kirk decide to redecorate and re-equip the house with new furniture, new hifi. All the existing junk can go to the dump - Chesney tries to convince them not to do anything rash - but he is not allowed to say anything.

In the Street Eileen and Fred meet - she has got to think of her boys, the job, the house - and she is nervous - it is beyond her experience. Harry tries to convince her - the past few months with Todd - she feels he need her. Harry tries to convince her otherwise - time she thought about herself - she should break away - sunshine and adventure. She sighs - but she cannot do it. Wonderful to be asked. She is sorry and so is Harry.

Inside the Rovers Harry announces he is going round the world in his camper van. Fred thinks he is joking - but he is deadly serious.

Ashley arrives home and Claire is still getting called Mummy - she wants him to explain - but Ashley says "Marry Me" - then she will be his mummy and it will solve all their problems. Not quite the most unromantic proposal of all time (I probably managed that - it was raining and it was in a car park in Milton Keynes) - but honestly Ashley you can do better than that.

After the break the factory girls are returning to work and Mike observes them and tells them to get into work and get on with it. Jamie drives around the corner with Mike's white van and he and Kirk empty the Battersby residence.

Blanche gives Frankie some earache before Dev and Maya return from their relaxing holiday. Dev and Sunita joke but Maya is certain Dev did not think of her once whilst they were away as she confides to Frankie - Blanche gave up and went and bought her pie elsewhere. Dev bought her a present - expensive perfume from duty free. He looks worried.

In the Street Maria hears Claire's problems. Maria reckons Ashley must love her. Maria tells Claire to accept the offer and congratulates her.

Cilla and Les are walking home - Les is telling Cilla about the wonderful new tv he has bought - a huge plasma jobbie. Anyway Cilla decides to reveal that her aunt has left all of the money to a cattery. She gets nothing. Cilla has had to hand the car back and everything - and they have got nothing. She keeps a straight face - and everything has gone to the tip. They go in to number 5 - completely empty apart from an ironing board and the curtains. Kirk comes downstairs - it is all on the tip. Kirk asks if they like it - including the Quo albums.

Harry is waiting outside the Rovers - inside there is food and drinks waiting but unusually we do not get the usual Rovers send off - although Fred gives a nice speech. Maria tells him to enjoy himself - she wishes she was going with him. Anyway Frankie is sorry to see him go - she wishes him bon voyage, before Eileen arrives. He cannot face the party inside - he would just be an employee. Eileen assures him she is a friend - and maybe more when he gets back. Harry does not want to be the centre of attention so he is leaving quietly - he has a ferry to catch. Janice goes inside to get the others - Harry says he will be back. Eileen tells him to enjoy every moment - and she would like a postcard - she kisses him on the cheek - he puts on his dark glasses and drives off into the wild blue yonder.

At the Peacocks Claire has put Joshua to bed early - she wants to talk about them. Ashley wants Claire to be his wife - with him for ever - but she thinks it is just as Joshua's mum. And she does not want the baby to be the excuse. Ashley asks again - but she says no. He is asking for the wrong reasons - she is going home and has nothing else to say.

And that is about it from me - I will be back next week for one last appearance and then Helen will be taking over from 20 August as I am dropping down to the reserve and holiday cover. Thanks for all the comments, the guidance where I got it wrong, and the congratulations.

And finally a little request: please can I have a Daran Little episode next week?

K Richard W

Good evening and welcome to Sunday night's episode.

We begin as Jamie is summoned by Les hammering on the door. I'm not quite sure if the programme makers are trying to show that Jamie has gone northern, or that he's quite common, despite him Mum's pretensions, but he's wearing a vest. Is it that cold in Manchester in the middle of summer? Les offers him money to help him find his furniture at the tip. Who knows, Les might even find something there that's BETTER than his old furniture.

At home, Fred is counseling Ashley in his own way. Fred believes honesty is always the best policy, despite convincing Ash for years that he was Uncle Fred, not Dad. Ashley tells Fred to go to the Square Dealers convention (are they still around? What have they been doing all this time? And what happens at a convention?).

In the pub Claire is telling Maria about Ashley's proposal. Maria thinks Claire ought to talk to Ashley about it, not to her. Fred is talking to Ciaran when he notices Claire. He goes over to tell her that he's off to his convention, "our Joshua is at his Grandma Beryl's" (Ashley's Mum's -- it took me a moment to make the connection because we hardly hear anything about her) and when he gets back, "I want happy, happy faces."

Les, Kirk and Cilla are at the refuse transfer station. Strangely, it's locked up. Maybe people in Greater Manchester are too busy going to church to need a tip on a Sunday. Les bribes the security guard to let them in and Jamie is surprised he would bother spending money to get back the load of junky furniture that was taken to be dumped. The furniture was put into a skip, Kirk says, but the skip has vanished or been moved. They split up to hunt for Les's belongings.

In the corner shop. Maya has arrived, complete with bottle of bubbly, to remind Dev that this would have been their Caribbean wedding day. Next thing, Sunita collapses to the floor. She appears to be only semi-conscious, but that doesn't stop Dev hauling her partly to her feet and dragging her towards the door. "Where are you going?" screeches Maya. I agree, they should have put Sunita into the recovery position and called for a doctor or ambulance. "I'm taking her up to the flat, she needs to lie down," says Dev. Strange, I thought that's what she was doing on the floor.

Cilla has obviously been mud-wrestling while we weren't looking. She holds something out to Les. It's an iguana, or, as Les calls it, "the lizard thingy". Jamie thinks it's Kirk's better-looking younger brother. There is a strange scraping noise. Is it the sound of someone dragging a Battersby sofa? Nope. It's Kirk on a space hopper he's found. Jamie says he's going back to the van to get some sleep.

In Sunita's flat, she is telling Dev what it's like having something in her head trying to kill her. He wants her to lie down, but she says that when she's lying down she can hear what's happening downstairs. She can hear Sally Webster coming in, full of her big plans but buying fish fingers for her tea. Sunita says this has always made her smile, but now she'd give anything to be Sally. "You'd be married to Kevin," Dev points out. "Maybe. But I wouldn't be alone," says Sunita.

As the hunt goes on for the Battersby rubbish, sorry, I mean furniture . . . Kirk has managed to find part of Les's Status Quo collection. They seem to have had some other finds, too, with a cane chair sitting proudly in the middle of the yard. Kirk also finds a miniature pool table. "I've got one word for you -- Balls," says Les. But Kirk isn't fazed. He's seen some balls in the bottom of a skip and asks the others to help him look. A squealing noise makes them look up and they see Jamie leaving in the van. "Great," says Cilla, "now I'm going to have to walk five miles home like this!" Les suggests she ask for a lift home from the police car which has appeared. It must be what scared off Jamie. Even though the police car is already passing, Les seems to think they should hide. There's plenty to hide behind, but he says they have to get into a skip, despite Cilla's protests. "Ten minutes in there or a night in the cells," he says.

Whack! Whack! Ashley is butchering and Claire is watching him through the window. He sees her and she starts to walk away, but he rushes out of the shop and stops her. She says she hasn't changed her mind and she thinks he's just looking for a replacement for Maxine, so Joshua will have someone to call Mummy.

In the Rovers, Janice has worked out that Harry asked Eileen to go with him, and wonders why she didn't. "So do I," Eileen admits. Janice says she's often wanted someone to come along and whisk her away, but she probably wouldn't have gone with Harry, either, if she'd been in Eileen's place. Elsewhere in the bar, Tracey has decided to help out Ciaran. She asks Mike what he's got against Ciaran. Penny seemed quite happy with the restaurant plan until Mike poked his nose in. Penny comes in and Tracey asks why she is letting Mike put her off investing with Ciaran. "And what exactly has it got to do with you?" Nothing, admits Tracey. But nor has it got anything to do with Mike. Penny tells Ciaran his girlfriend isn't helping and together Tracey and Ciaran chorus that she's not his girlfriend. Ciaran makes apologies and tells Mike and Penny that the drinks will be on Tracey.

A little parade comes down the street carrying a deck chair, a cane chair, a mini pool table, a sorry-looking turntable, part of a Status Quo collection . . . Les marches straight up to Steve McDonald and tells him he's made a mistake. "What, have you ordered a Ferrari instead of a Jag?" asks Steve. Les says he shouldn't have thrown in his job. Steve tells him he's already found a replacement, a friend of Patrick's. And this guy won't shout "Pillock" every time he sees a police car, especially not when he's got two nuns and a six-year-old girl in the car. "I just forgot for a minute," Les says. Steve tells him the new guy won't argue over night shifts, either. It's a guy called Les Battersby. He's starting with night shift tonight. "And get Cilla to hose you down before then."

Ashley has gone to talk to Claire. He wants an answer, but Claire thinks he's asking the wrong question. She accuses him of using Joshua to try to get his own way.

Dev is serving in the shop when Sally comes in. She is buying fish fingers. Dev is clearly amused at this and she gets defensive. "Fish fingers may not be the traditional Sunday dinner, but my girls love them," she says. "And what the latest plan?" he asks. "I know there must be one." Sal isn't quite sure how to take this, but tells him that as a businessman he knows how important it is to keep looking for something new. Maya asks Dev how Sunita is. She suggests it might be related to Sunita's emotions -- after all it happened just as Maya was talking about their wedding day. She hurriedly tells Dev that she means it might have brought back thoughts about Sunita's planned wedding to Ciaran.

Claire has now fronted up to Ashley. She wants to know if that is the best proposal she's going to get from him. He says that if she's looking for a man on a white charger, it's not him. "I'm a widower with a small child. I live in the real world," he says. He still wants to marry her. He suggests that her real problem is that she's afraid of commitment and is looking for a reason to say no. Then Claire says a very strange thing. She says Josh will go to nursery school soon, and he'll probably call someone Mummy there. And he'll go to school and call someone Mummy there, too, "because that's what kids do. What are you going to do then? Marry them all?" This is very odd, because it's Claire who was really worried by Joshua calling her Mummy and insisting that Ashley explain things to Josh.

At the Battersby household, with its new minimalist look, Les is looking at the new television, saying they should be watching it on a white leather suite. Kirk is busy playing pool on a mini table with full-size balls and a broomstick cue. Jamie knocks on the door. He has managed to rescue Les's chair from some tramps who were going to use it for firewood. Les complains that it's wet but it hasn't been raining. Jamie admits it doesn't smell like rainwater. Ick! Kirk tries to cheer up Les by suggesting they play some Quo. In the background a sour-looking Cilla is looking less than relaxed in her deck chair. Les puts the disc on the turntable (no, I didn't see them bring back any speakers, either) and the music blares out: "A dick-a-dum-dum, dick-a-dum-dum." Yay! It's Des O'Connor!!

And, as they usually do just when disaster strikes, the credits begin to roll . . .

The end.

Margaret Carr

Well not content with reading these reports, it seems a Canadian has escaped and found her way to England! Of all the places for her to go she has arrived on Anne's doorstep! So while intense negotiations go on, I am writing tonight's first report.

[The above pathetic attempt at humour was written, produced and conceived by myself. I accept all responsibility for it, and will try not to let it happen again].

Now to tell you what happened in the Street. The programme starts in Rita's Kabin. She is offering Ashley a copy of "Gone with the Wind" for Claire. She didn't realise it was a book before the film. But frankly my dear, he doesnât give a damn! He says he has had a row with Claire, and he is not sure when he is going to see her again.

Ciaran tries to give Penny his apologies for Tracy interfering in their affairs.

Rita asks Ashley what the row was all about. He starts hesitantly but then says he asked her to marry him. Rita thinks this is strange, because it should be a happy occasion.

Maya and Dev are running the corner shop between them. Maya has successfully managed to change the till roll. Dev asks her to do him a favour. He has had received a product recall notice for jars of pickles, there being a problem with the lid. He wants her to go round all the shops that make up the Alahan Empire and remove the jars from the shelves. (Well it is a job that somebody has to do).

Shelley arrives at Sunita's flat at the same time as Dev. They both wander upstairs together.

Rita goes round to the hairdressers to talk to Claire. She seems to think it is funny that they should row over a proposal. Claire tells her what has happened. She says that he won't let her have her own opinion. He is not listening to her. He thinks that marriage will solve everything.

Sunita tells Shelley that Dev has been looking after her. Sunita wonders how things would have been if she had got together with Ciaran. At that moment enter Dev with a plateful of "Eggs ˆ l'Alahan" . Shelley tells Sunita that she has a number of friends that will stick by her.

Jack is briefing the women in his bowls team about using psychology to beat their opponents. [Not quite sure what psychology he wants to use, but I'm sure he will have it sorted!].

In the butcher's Ashley is serving Rita [she is becoming similar to a mid-east negotiator!]. She is trying to convince Ashley to make up with Claire. She thinks they are both suitable for each other. She tells Ashley not to make himself miserable.

We return after the break to StreetCars. Eileen is fantasizing about a man in a boiler suit! [Oh, Come on Eileen!]. Steve is not really interested. When Dev comes in she asks him about his fantasies. The phone rings and Eileen puts the caller on hold. Turning back to Dev, he tells her that he pays her to answer the phone and not to chat.

Back in the Corner Shop, Sunita has gained the strength to come downstairs. The first thing she does is to fix the till roll. [There was I thinking that Maya had actually found a skill in life]. She tells Maya (presuming Dev had fixed it), that she has told Dev before not to touch it. It needs delicate hands, and there is a knack to fixing it. Maya immediately turns to Dev and asks him if she has "delicate hands".

Tracy is in Ciaranâs flat again. Penny comes round and gives him a cheque for GBP 50,000. When she leaves, Tracy and Ciaran hug and kiss one another. [Methinks Tracy has an eye on the money!].

Ashley invites Claire round to talk. He has palmed off Josh to a passing stranger, oh no it was Rita who just happened to be passing by!

Steve is in the Rovers and starts talking about Eileen and her fantasy. She says it is private. She is therefore surprised that Fizz seems to know all about it.

Shelley advises Dev that he is like a boyfriend to Sunita. The one that she hasn't got. She thinks he ought to cool off. At this point Maya comes over and says that Sunita is very perky [so she will not have to cover her job in the next few weeks]. Dev agrees.

Ashley and Claire start arguing again about Josh. She tells him that when her Dad was very ill and dying nobody told her about it. It made it much worse for her when he did die. She feels everybody should be open. Claire says that Josh still trusts Ashley. Then Ashley informs her that [drum roll, please] he is not his father

At this point I tell you Margaret should be here next (unless she has posted ahead of me), and tell you that with a bit of a luck Anne will be in this seat - well not exactly this seat - next Monday.

Martin Rosen

Here we are with Episode Two, from Monday night.

"So, what are you telling me?" asks Sunita.
"That I love you," says Dev.
Sunita is quite upset. She tells him that she's got enough going on in her head without this.

Ashley is telling Claire he should have told her right from the start that he wasn't Josh's real father. Maxine's affair was a one-off thing and when Joshua came along Maxine always said he was Ashley's. "Eventually I decided to believe her." He says if Josh hadn't needed tests, "all them secrets could have been buried with Maxine. I grew up with a lie and I said I wouldn't do that to Joshua, but when you see what he has to learn -- that his Mum's dead and I'm not his Dad -- I don't think I can do that.

In the street, the bowls team is posing for a group photo a la Charlie's Angels, with Jack as Charlie. Jack points out to them that if they were an elite team they would be looking after themselves, with fitness and nutrition, carb-loading before a big match. Eileen points out that they are carb-loading -- chips are carbs. Jack/Charlie says elite bowlers would avoid excesses, avoiding activities that were physically demanding or led to sleep deprivation. "Are you talking about sex?" asks Fizz. "Mind and body have to be together," Jack says. Eileen ponders the sacrifice she will have to make in order to go without sex.

In Sunita's flat, Dev says he hasn't told Maya he loves Sunita. Sunita wonders why she wasn't good enough for him until she had "this thing in my head". Does Dev want her to spend what is possibly the last part of her life watching him with someone else, or wrecking someone else's life for her? "Do you love her?" Sunita asks. The answer is yes. "Then I want you to go, please."

In the pub, Hayley refuses a drink in the interests of match fitness. "I bet you were a prefect at school," says Sonia. "No, I was too busy getting bullied," Hayley says frankly. Eileen's potential boiler-man is still there. He comes over and Janice moves the other away. Liz tells Eileen he's been asking about her boiler. " Joe wanted to impress her with his knowledge of "the ins and outs of it," Liz says. Eileen tells him that he doesn't qualify as her fantasy man. "He said nothing, and I never found out his name, Joe." It is clear she thinks Joe has been put up to this by someone. Frankie and Maya are also in the pub. Frankie is giving Maya a pep talk. She tells her that if she wants Dev to marry her she'll have to give him a nudge. "Wear him down. He'll marry you to shut you up," Frankie says.

In Ciaran's flat, he and Tracey appear to have done the deed. She is wearing the obligatory shirt only and he is carving a notch on the doorpost, because he doesn't have a bedpost.

Claire is looking at Joshua's birth certificate. Ashley explains that it was Josh which got him through everything. "If he ever got taken away from me . . ." Claire tells him not to torture himself.

Maya comes out of the pub and Dev is waiting for her in the car. She immediately starts talking about honeymoons and says she still favours the idea of getting married abroad. Dev doesn't want to talk about it now, but she carries on. "I said Not Now!" he snaps. This isn't a conversation. It's a marriage planning meeting!" Maya suggests he draw up a list of topics he's willing to talk about, then gets out of the car and stalks off.

[break -- make yourself a coffee before reading on]

Ciaran is late into work, saying he fell asleep. Shelley accuses him of taking advantage, then heads off to see Sunita. Blanche is going on about Tracey not coming back , "acting like she's young, free and single." "Isn't she?" asks Ciaran. No, she's not, apparently. "She's not free -- she's got a baby," Blanche says. Eileen is doing her lippy before asking whether anyone wants any crisps. Janice points out that she shouldn't need excuses to go to the bar. "Just got and stand with him!" Eileen points out that crisps are carbs, prompting a discussing on whether she is likely to stick to ALL the rules for elite players. Joe comes over and says he'll be going because he's just passing through.

Shelley enters the shop where Sunita is packing recalled goods. Sunita tells Shelley what Dev has said. Shelley is appalled because Dev and Maya have been in the pub discussing the wedding. Sunita suggests she would consider having an affair with Dev. "I used to have principles, but that was before I found I didn't have time to live them out." "That won't make you feel better," says Shelley, pointing out that it would make Sunita second best. Sunita says she's hurt and scared. "When Dev hugs me I feel better -- is that so bad?"

In Dev's flat, Maya tells him she's been nothing but supportive today. She's even gone around Manchester rescuing jars of pickles from the unsuspecting public. She doesn't deserve the way she's been treated. Dev says he's getting a headache. Maya whips out a bottle of tablets and gives them to him. "I want you in a state I can shout at!" Dev says he loves her, but she claims he is skipping the arguing part of the process and going straight to the making up. They kiss, but Dev then says he has to nip back, and he leaves.

In the pub, last orders are being called. Liz takes the chance to leave early. Dev comes in and Shelley tells Ciaran that he's not to serve anyone else. Which annoys Eileen, who's been waiting to make a last order. Liz comes back in. She's found Joe outside. Sonia asks Eileen: "What about the sex ban?" Eileen says she's gone without for three years. "Do you really think Jack Duckworth's coming between me and him?" She turns to Joe. "I've got something awfully wrong with my boiler."

Claire wishes Ashley had told her the truth sooner. Ash says whenever he gets anything good he waits for it to be taken away. Claire tells him there are three of them now.

In the pub, Shelley is having a go at Dev. "The last thing Sunita feels is loved," she says. But Dev says he needs her in the world. He says it wasn't him talking weddings, but Maya alone. "I've been married to Mr Cake-And-Eat-It, remember," says Shelley. Dev says he's not Peter. He can't pretend this isn't happening. Shelley says if that's true then he should be telling Maya they have no future. "I can't take a sledgehammer to what I've got with her," says Dev. "Sunita's what I want. Am I not allowed to hurt over what I've got to do to be with her?"

Dah dah de da-da dah . . .

Margaret Carr

This Report is by : Michaela Davis Wednesday 11-8-04

Hi every one.

We open with Maya opening the bedroom door and Dev is sitting at the table, Dev says Hi and pass Maya a box of chocolates. Maya asks Dev did he come to bed last night and Dev says yes but Maya says that she did not hear him, Maya asks him how did the big head to head meeting with Steve go last night that was more important then being in bed with her. Dev gets really defence with her. Maya tries to seduce Dev but he tells her he has to go to work. But Maya tells him to tell Sunita that he is going to take her away from it all, and to take her out to dinner and says that soft centres are not an option.

Shelly tries to tell Sunita that Dev is being really sincere when he says he loves her but Sunita says so says the many wives of Peter Barlow, Shelly tells Sunita that the man she fancies loves the pants off her but Sunita thinks it is because she is ill that Dev wants her, but Shelly says it is not about pity it is something more Shelly's says that Dev could help her when she is felling alone at night but Sunita says no she would be helping him. But that Dev could help by carrying her coffin, Sunita tells Shelly it is none of her business anyway but Shelly says that she could scream as this is every thing Sunita every wanted and tells her if she does not grab it with both hands she could regret it every day. Shelly says that she could have gone straight to Maya with this and that Dev is taking a big risk for her and that she should take a big risk for Dev. Sunita asks Shelly to go but Shelly says to Sunita if you can't be true with me be true with yourself.

Eileen wakes up to find Joe still there but he keeps calling her Helen, she asks him when is his next job but he says if he goes now the M54 would be murder and asks if their is any food as he is hungry. but Eileen is worried the boys will see him, she tells him that she does not make a habit of this and that her name is Eileen and as they are shaking hands Jason is behind them, Jason then goes back up stairs without saying a word.

Claire asks Ashley if he is all right and he says yes but tells her she does not have to make his sandwiches for him. Claire tells him she is sorry and he says for what and she says for him not being able to talk to her about Josh, and that all she wants to be is make him happy and Ashley says that she does and he pulls her in for a hug he then asks Josh wants does he wants and Claire says he wants the same as me you fool as Daddy.

Todd is sitting on the settee talking to Joe when Jason comes into the room he introduces Joe to Jason , but Jason gets the wrong end of the stick and thinks that Joe is with Todd, when Todd says he is not with him Jason asks who is he with and Eileen who is behind him shouts he is with me, Joe makes some excuse and leaves and Eileen punches Jason in the arm.

Tracy and Ciaran bump in to each other as Tracy is coming out of the house with Amy saying that her Dad will not look after Amy as he is too busy reading up on automotice in the north west. And Ciaran says that she can't charm everyone like he did with her, but Tracy says she only slept with him as he beg her to.

Shelly tells Charlie maybe she was sticking her nose in and that she might have made things worse she then looks over to were Tracy and Ciaran are talking and says maybe there is a hope for Dev and Sunita after all and asks Charlie if Ciaran and Tracy are together, Charlie says he does not now and says why don't she suss it out her self as he is giving Ciaran a quote for the wine bar this afternoon and Shelly was shocked that he got the money.

Sunita comes out of the Kabin but tells Shelly that she is to busy to chat she gives Maya the change she got form the Kabin and goes in to the back room to make a phone call, Maya follows her and asks her if she is ok Sunita tells her she is ok but she as to make a phone call, Maya asks her who does she need to phone and Sunita says Dev, Maya tells her she could give Dev a message from her. Sunita puts the phone down and tells Maya that she wanted to tell Dev first but tells Maya that she is leaving

_____________________________BREAK____________________________________

Ciaran, Tracy, Charlie and Shelly go and have a look at the wine bar, Tracy and Shelly start bickering with each other, Ciaran says he is calling it Funsion which will serve Irish, Tali food but Shelly told him to be careful as that is a lot of dishes to keep track off but Tracy says hark at Delia but shells hits back by saying to Tracy what do you sell apart from flowers and babies. But Tracy ignores her and walks of nearer to Ciaran. Shelly tells Ciaran that she would have the seating area next to the bar but Tracy does not think so, Charlie says that Shelly as a good head for idea for places and Tracy laughs and says yes for cutting designs look no further than the rovers return, but Shelly says the rovers is down to Fred and she can't touch the Bar area. Ciaran says yes that is what is so good about his place it is like a big blank canvas and he tells Charlie that he would like Slate flooring

Maya asks sunita where is she going and Sunita says tat she does not know and Maya then asks how long is she going for and Sunita says that she will never see her again, Maya says that she will tell Dev that she is going. Sunita tells maya that their is a list of things that they need by the till and that Janice was short of 15 Pence and that she will drop it in. Maya tells Sunita that she is being very brave but Sunita tells her that she is not brave she is just tried, tired of being ill and tired off being around here and she is unhappy being here. Sunita says she does not know how long she as left and would rather spend it where she could be happy, she tells Maya that they are from different worlds, but Maya says yes but some how they have both end up in the same one.

Shelly tells Dev that she told Sunita what he told her and she can't get involved and Dev said that is is between him and Sunita but Shelly said and May, Ciaran tried to get Betty t come and work in his now Bar. Ciaran says to dev what about him and shelly last night but Dev tells him not now.

Audrey asks Candice to tell Sarah why she is cutting the hair to the sides, but Sarah already new, Sarah answers the phone but tells the client that they do not do that at the saloon, Audrey tells her that they do what ever the client wants but Sarah says it was Frankie Baldwin and that she want a Brazilian wax, and Candice says that Sarah could do that, but Sarah says no she is her to learn hair dressing not hair removal.

Janice asks Eileen if she was going to tell Jsck about last night, Jack asks what is going on and Sonia says that she is not a born again virgin anymore, Jack is not happy about it and says it would be better if he was teaching rabbits.

Rita tells Audrey that she is doing a good job with Candice and Audrey says yes she as excelled herself but she as a problem as she took Sarah on to give her some sense of purpose back in her life but there is not enough people coming in to the saloon for both Sarah and Candice, but Audrey told Rita that Candice looks at her as a mother figure but Sarah is her granddaughter, but she as to sack Sarah.

Dev asks Maya how it is going and that he should have got someone to come and pick up the jars of pickled onions up. Maya tells him that Sunita as gone, Dev says gone where and Maya says that she as packed her bags. Dev shouts at Maya saying as she gone, Maya asks Dev did she deserve that, and Dev says sorry and leaves the shop and go to Sunita flat, she lets him in and he says thank god i thought you had gone, Sunita tells him that she is leaving now she says that it is better for every one if she goes, but Dev says that she will ruin his life if she goes. Maya turns up and he tells her that he tried so hard as not to hurt her but he loves Sunita for years and he wants to be with her, Maya says she does not believe him as only this morning he told her he loved her, he said he was sorry but Maya tells him to get his hands off her and that he promised her that their was nothing going on with Sunita, Sunita tells Dev to stop but Dev tells her that he regrets not spending every day with her, but Maya says to Dev how can he say that to Sunita after everything he as said to her, Dev tells Maya that he meant every thing he said to her but Maya tells him to go to hell and walks out. Dev tells Sunita that he tried everything possible to stop this from happening, but Sunita says that she never asked for any of this and tells Dev to get out of her flat. Dev leaves and then he breaks down outside Sunita flats and cries.

It is Friday 13 August and this will be my last update for a while as I am stepping down to the substitute's bench. I hope that all of you have enjoyed at least some aspects of events over the past few months and will give a warm welcome to Helen when she takes over next week.

Events in the Sporty Street tonight are copyright ITV Television and they were written by Martin Allen, directed by Daniel Wilson and the sponsor was Cadbury's Roses once again. (Oh and Zoe Tate is going mad in Emmerdale again judging by the tape I have just seen in the corner of my eye).

Sunita is lying on the sofa and failing to respond to Dev's entreaties to answer the phone.

Along at the Rovers the bowls team is being told to dress properly by Jack - a white blouse and a dark skirt or slacks. Fiz asks what slacks are? Eileen explains. Janice was going to wear her shell suit, Jack almost despairs and reminds them they must not wear shoes which damage the green. Shelley is not sure she can get such clothes to wear, in which case she cannot play.

Katy leaves the Rovers with Martin close behind. She is wearing a min-skirt with a slit at the side and a smart blouse. Tommy, needless to say wants to know why she is dressed up. Driving test time. And she is not going to use Tommy's car - she will go with Martin - whom Tommy accuses of being behind the clothes. He denies responsibility. Tommy eventually wishes Katy well. Katy observes that Tommy and Martin have a lot in common.

Maria asks Sarah to make a male customer a cup of tea but she has stopped sweeping the floor and is reading a magazine and does not want to be distracted. Audrey nods at Maria to do it herself and Candice is instructed to make a phone call to a customer. Audrey wants a word with Sarah - the trial period is almost over. But Sarah starts crying - the article is about women who lose babies and there is a support group in Manchester. She applies the blackmail to Audrey who realises that this is not a good moment to pursue the trial period as Sarah goes on about the support she gets without joining a special group. And having saved herself from the sack she goes to make the cup of tea.

Sunita has brought Shelley up to date. They discuss Dev's announcement. Sunita thinks that Dev might change his mind again. Shelley reckons Dev has come to his senses but Sunita does not think he can trust him.

David and Craig are kicking a ball around annoying Candice and Maria when a lad gets off the bus and juggles the ball in keepy-uppy mode for a few minutes before asking where he can find an offie. Candice and Maria are both taken by the new talent.

Along at Weatherfield Quays Maya turns up at Dev's flat to collect her clothes. She bickers with Dev. Maya remind Dev that he said he would never let her down. Talk is cheap Dev and she calls him a lousy liar. As she packs they continue to argue. Dev keeps saying he is sorry, but Maya is not accepting the apology - she has lost everything.

Frankie, Danny and Jamie are eating when there is a knock at the door. It is the new kid on the block who turns out to be the second son who starts nicking chips off Danny's plate after he has shrieked "Surprise Surprise in a fake Liverpool accent.

The first bowls match is underway. The girls are in the approved uniform - but the competitors are wearing almost anything. Shelley makes a mess of her delivery - her trousers are too tight and she falls over hurting her back. So it is now Eileen's turn and her mobile goes just as she goes to release the bowl. She answers the phone and talks to Jason who is hungry. The other team protest. Apparently there are league rules banning all mobile phones. So Eileen's game is lost. And so to Hayley' comet. She delivers a perfect bowl (although the identity of the said item changes between hand and jack) to win her game and the overall match is won by the Rovers. Back to the Rovers for a celebration.

Turns out the lad is called Warren and he is a trainee with Brentford football club and he claims he has an ankle injury - although he is obviously lying - he will be laid up for 10 - 14 days but there is no treatment. Warren wants to know what is going on - the house is a bit of come down. Temporary says Danny.

Dev tries to convince Maya that there has been no affair. Maya is crying - Dev says that Sunita through him out. Dev tells Maya that he cannot make it up with her, she begs him not to leave her. He tells her to get on with the packing and then leaves the flat. He goes to Sunita - he wants to talk. He tells her that Maya is packing. Sunita hardly gives him the time of day, but he starts talking her round. Eventually he asks Sunita if she loves him. She hears him out and she admits she has never stopped loving him. She moves to him and they both start smiling before he folds his arms around her.

Katy arrives in the Rovers and tells her parents that the examiner was an old woman and has a deliberately annoyed face. They swallow hook line and sinker for about 30 seconds until she smiles and gives the game away - she has passed. They congratulate her - first time pass. She thanks both Tommy and Martin for their help. Tommy is not amused and nor is Sarah who tells Martin that she is glad someone is happy and leaves. At the bar Shelley is obviously in pain and tells Jack that she is not taking part.

Back at the Quays flat there is not a word spoken, but Maya looks at a photograph of her and Dev and then throws it across the room and the sound of something breaking seems to send her over the edge, vases are dashed to the ground, the shelving unit is pulled over and then she grabs the light and uses the base to smash the wide screen television; pans are thrown around the kitchen area, pictures knocked off the walls and finally the piece de resistance, she picks up a vase of flowers and smashes it down onto a glass table (with the camera under the table and it shatters above the camera lens).

She crunches glass under her expensive heels, picks up her matching luggage and leaves the devastation behind.

And so it is good bye from me - at least for now.

K Richard W

We start tonightâs episode with Dev leading Sunita into his flat to show her the damage that Maya has done. Dev wants to show Sunita so she realises that he is putting that part of his life behind him. Sunita is more concerned about Maya. Tyrone and Kirk turn up to clear up the mess. Sunita tries to help as well but Dev tells her not to and he takes her away.

Candice is walking down the street. Warren chases after her and tries to ask her out but she is not interested. Frankie then comes out and shouts him for his breakfast. She then tells Candice that he is a footballer. Candiceâs eyes light up at this thought.

Tyrone and Kirk are having a whale of a time in Devâs flat playing with all his stuff ö cricket stuff, camcorder etc. They decide to have a game of cricket inside the flat.

Frankie gives lunch to Jamie and Warren and reminds Danny that he is taking her out for dinner in a posh restaurant. As soon as they are gone Jamie twists Warrens ankle until he tells him what is going on. Warren admits that he has been chucked out of Brentford Football Club and his contract has been cancelled.

Ashley and Claire are walking down the street when Katy comes screeching towards them. She is elated that she has passed her test but Martin looks scared. Katy offers them a spin but they politely decline and say they are going to the Rovers for a drink. Sarah is across the street ö gives Martin a dirty look and goes into the Salon. She finds Audrey in there cleaning. Audrey looks worried. Sarah has a few jibes about Candice and then offers to help Audrey with the cleaning in return for cash.

Dev and Sunita are kissing in the shop when Steve walks in. He tells Dev to be careful and Dev tells him that Maya has gone. Steve asks what the damage was ö and learns about his flat. Steve congratulates them.

Sarah and Audrey are chatting when Candice walks in and is wondering what is going on. Candice thinks that Audrey is going to sack her but Sarah is shocked to find out that it is her that gets the sack. Audrey tries to explain that she cannot afford to have them both working there. Sarah storms out.

Shelly and Jack are at the bar. Jack tries to persuade Shelly that her back is not that bad. She tells him that Ciaran had to tie her shoe laces this morning and that he should have seen the problem she had with her nicors.

Clare is retelling her story about her failed driving test. She says that she saw a sparrow in the road and refused to reverse in case it didnât fly away. The instructor told her to reverse or she would fail. She failed and threatened to report him to the RSPB.

Dev is in the pub and thanks Shelly for helping him and Sunita get back together. She admits that she might be bitter, twisted and cynical but knows the Îreal thingâ when she sees it.

Tyrone and Kirk are still cleaning the flat when they find a videotape labeled ÎTracyâ. The jump to conclusions and Tyrone takes it home to watch it there as Maya has broken the video recorder.

Gail is in the garden when Sarah walks in. Sarah is in tears and tells her mum that she has been sacked. Gail asks what she did and Sarah tells her that she did nothing wrong. Gail looks like a fish.

Over in the Rovers Martin and Katy decide to go home so that Katy can have a real drink. They invite Ashley and Clare back. Martin asks if he can invite Sarah.

Tyrone goes to the pub and finds Jack in there, He asks after Vera in the hope that she is out but Jack tells him she is watching a film and will be sat in front of the telly for ages.

Sunita has cooked a meal for Dev. She cant eat anything but she tells him that she likes to watch him eat. They goo over each other saying how happy they are and that this might be their last chance. Dev tries to tell Sunita that they are together forever and she will be fine.

Martin goes to see Sarah. She goes off on one and tells him that she has been sacked and that she hates everyone. She then bursts into tears in his arms.

Jack is still trying to convince Shelly that her injury is not too bad. Janice then walks in the pub with her fingers in plasters. She was doing over time at the factory and sewed her fingers on to a pair of nicors. Jack is concerned that it is her bowling hand but she is more concerned that it is her drinking hand.

Candice comes to meet Warren. He asks her if it is because he is a footballer. She says know and they flirt with each other. Jamie tells Danny that Brentford have dropped Warren ö meanwhile Frankie is singing Warrens praises and footballing skills to anyone who will listen.

Fish Face (Gail) walks in the pub and has a go at Audrey. Audrey tries to explain but Gail wont listen. Gail tells her that unless Audrey gets down on bended knee and apologises and offers Sarah her job back she can forget about seeing any of her family ever again. The pub has gone quiet to listen to this and then Gail storms out again and the banter carries on.

Dev and Sunita are still being sloppy. He tells her she must rest but she is having none of it. She tells him that she wants to be loved and they must think that there is no tomorrow. She leads him to her bedroom ö the door shuts and the credits roll.

Thatâs all for tonight

Thank you

Mary Earlam

Hi everyone! Well I had a really good time with my Canadian friend, we havenât seen each other since we were children but we still have such a lot in common, including the fact that we are both avid Corrie fans! I didnât know that until she got here, but she watches every Sunday morning in Toronto, so we had even more to talk about.

Anyway, here is the first of tonightâs episodes.

Itâs early morning in Sunitaâs flat and she is preparing to go to the hospital for her operation. Dev comes in, they confess to each other that neither of them slept much, and he offers her lots of comfort and support.

Kirk is knocking frantically on the Duckworthâs front door, and, for reasons that remain a mystery to me, is hopping about as if heâs about to wet himself. Tyrone answers the door, ÎWhatâs up with you?â he asks. Kirk says heâs bursting, and asks if Tyrone has watched the tape. Ty explains that he couldnât because Vera was watching a film. Just then Tracy walks past, pushing the pram. ÎMorning boys,â she says, and they return the greeting, sniggering. Kirk tells Tyrone they can watch the tape at his house at lunchtime, and then dashes in to the bathroom.

As Tyrone closes his front door, Norris opens his, and rushes out ahead of Emily, mithering in usual Norris fashion. Heâs wondering how Emily can be so calm, but she says sheâs quite pleased. He tells her if heâd had a letter like that heâs be a jibbering wreck, and she tells him he is a jibbering wreck. He thinks sheâs suppressing his emotions and she wishes he would suppress his.

Ciaran meets Tracy in the street and tells her that Penny Kingâs cheque has cleared, sheâs now looking at a man with 50k in the bank. Tracy isnât impressed. She tells him anyone can say they have money in the bank, itâs only cold hard cash that turns her on. She leaves Ciaran standing with a thoughtful look on his face.

Warren, the youngest Baldwin, is sitting on the sofa with a plate of sausage, egg and bacon on his knees. Danny comes in and clips him round the ear, telling him heâs a dipstick who doesnât learn. Thereâs nothing wrong with his ankle he tells him, and asks why they gave him the boot. Warren wants to know who told him, Danny tells him heâs telepathic. Warren whinges that the coach had it in for him, he didnât like him, and poured poison into the gafferâs ear. Danny reckons it was parties, birds and booze as well as shooting his mouth off. Warren doesnât deny it, just asks if his mum knows yet. Danny tells him she will soon, Warren is going to tell him. As he is leaving, Jamie comes in. ÎOh, by the way,â says Danny, ÎIâm not telepathic, Supergrass told me!â When Warren protests to Jamie, heâs told that their dad would have found out anyway, Warrenâs as bad at lying as he is at penalties.

Just then, Frankie walks in. ÎMorning boys,â she greets them. Sheâs horrified when she sees that Warren is eating Îjunkâ and whips the plate away, saying she will fix him muesli and fresh fruit.

Over at the hair salon, Audrey is just telling Candice that Gail is booked in for a cut at 2pm when Norris bursts in. He is outraged at Audrey that Emily has received a summons for non payment of council tax. Audrey tells him sheâs sorry, but it has nothing to do with her. Norris is worried that Emily could go to prison, he knows what goes on in those places, he has watched ÎBad Girlsâ. Audrey finally blows her top. ÎStop wittering on, you annoying little man!â she exclaims, and shoos him out.

Blanche and Deirdre are in the corner shop. Blanche takes great delight in telling Deirdre the latest news that Emily has been summonsed for not paying her council tax. She says it is a sad state of affairs when a pensioner has to end her days sewing mailbags and dealing snout, and all because of the Alf Roberts Memorial Fountain. Deirdre confides that the council are getting cold feet and have called an emergency meeting.

Sunita walks into the shop, much to Toddâs surprise. She is just telling him that she forgot her shampoo when Blanche calls out, ÎExcuse me!â Todd starts to walk over, but Blanche wants Sunita to serve her, she tells Todd he gave her the wrong change last week. Sunita starts to say that sheâs on her way out, but then changes her mind and serves. Dev then comes in and wonders what she is doing, and takes her off.

Tyrone and Kirk are drawing the curtains and getting ready to watch the Îmucky videoâ of Tracy. Kirk excitedly tells Ty that theyâve got slow-mo and freeze frame on there. Just as Tyrone presses the play button, the front door opens and Fizz walks in. Tyrone leaps up, takes the video out of the machine and hides it behind his back. They both look incredibly guilty. ÎAre you two up to summat?â queries Fizz, ÎWhatâs that behind yer back?â ÎNothing!â they both chorus. ÎItâs a video int it?â she asks. ÎHow did you guess?â asks poor, gormless Kirk. ÎBecause you were fiddling with the video when I came in,â she tells them. Tyrone says he has to get back to work, and rushes out of the house. Fizz puts two and two together and works out that they have a mucky video. ÎWhat do want that for when you got me, lover?â she asks him, ÎCome Îere and give us a snog!â She then decides that Mr. Baldwin wonât miss her for 20 minutes and they go upstairs.

Dev and Sunita have arrived at the hospital and, after the nurse pulls the curtains around the bed, she starts to get changed into the obligatory hospital gown. Dev is trying to be positive and look to the future, so he suggests that when she is well enough they go on holiday. The surgeon arrives, already gowned for surgery, to make a quick examination of Sunita and answer any of her questions. ÎLetâs get this show on the road,â he tells her.

After the break we see Gail and Martin strolling down the street. ÎWhat kind of woman sacks her own granddaughter?â moans Gail. Martin wonders if sheâs asked her and actually waited for an answer. Gail thinks that Audrey thinks more about her business and Candice than she does about Sarah. Martin tells her to listen to herself, does she really think that Audrey is a hard hearted business woman whoâs only goal is to make Gail miserable. Gail thinks it starts to look like that. Martin asks if Gail having a go at Audrey is helping Sarah, and then walks off, leaving Gail standing there.

Deirdre comes out of her front door and starts to walk briskly down the street. The door opens again, and Blanche hurries out, following Deirdre. ÎWait for me,â she calls. Deirdre turns. ÎIâm going to work,â she tells her. ÎI know,â says Blanche, Îand Iâm coming with you.â ÎItâs not ÎBring Your Mother To Work Dayââ Deirdre says, and Blanche says she just wants to go to the council offices to find out what is happening about Alfâs fountain. Deirdre warns that if Blanche shows her up sheâs disowning her.

At the hospital, the surgeon is explaining to Dev and Sunita, with the aid of a diagram of the brain, exactly what they are going to do. They are going to feed platinum wire into the blood vessels to strengthen those that might otherwise rupture. He tells her that the good thing is she will be fully recovered in 24 hrs. He tells her that there is a 2-5 percent chance that she could suffer a stroke, but that risk is far less than living with an aneurysm which could cause sudden death at any time. ÎI might die,â Sunita tells Dev after the surgeon has left. ÎWhereâs the notepaper?â She jumps up and gets the notepaper and, sitting down, starts to write a letter to her mum.

In the cafŽ, starry-eyed Candice is at a table talking to Warren. He tells her that footballers only train for 2 hrs a day and the rest of the time the lads play golf, or go shopping for cars or plasma screen televisions. Candice reckons she could help with shopping, and is sure he is paid so much money he just doesnât know what to do with it all. She then gets up to get 2 coffees from Leanne who is serving. She tells her, in hushed tones, that she thinks he could be The One. ÎThe size of his paypacket has nothing to do with it then?â smirks Leanne. Candice tells her not to be jealous, and maybe she could fix her up with one of his mates. Just then Danny comes in, and, flicking Warren round the ear, drags him off to tell Frankie the news he has been sacked.

In the pub, Ciaran is leaving on bank business, telling Liz heâll only be an hour. Audrey and Martin are at the bar, discussing the situation with Gail. Martin feels she might be calming down a bit, and Audrey is glad because sheâs running out of energy. Over at a table, Jamie is asking Tyrone if itâs true that they have a dirty video of Tracy. Tyrone wants to know how he knows, and Kirk pipes up that he told him. They make arrangements to all watch it round at Tyroneâs house that evening, because Vera is going to bingo.

Frankie is in the Kabin, just paying for her purchases and telling Rita and Norris about her talented, footballer son, when Danny comes in with the boy in question. He orders Warren to tell his mother, and then tells him for him. ÎHeâs been booted out of Brentford,â he tells her. ÎWhat!â exclaims Frankie, and then they all go off home to continue the discussion.

In the hospital, Sunita is giving Dev letters for her mum, Shelley and himself, in case she doesnât see any of them again. They sit quietly, side by side on the bed, waiting for the trolley to come for her.

Tracy comes into the pub and walks up to the bar to talk to Ciaran. Tyrone and Kirk and company all stare at her and smirk as she walks by. She asks Ciaran if they are staring at her, and tells him itâs starting to freak her out. He invites her round to his flat later on, minus the baby, but wonât tell her why.

Rita and Emily are sitting at a table, and Rita tells her that sheâs worried about her, she could go to prison. Emily tells her sheâs standing up for a principal and is not backing down.

Jamie is at the bar, standing next to Steve while he waits to be served. They look along to the bar at Tracy. Jamie tells Steve sheâs a good looking girl and used to go out with Dev, the fellow who owns the corner shop. Steve tells him he knows. ÎI bet I could tell you something you donât know·..âbegins Jamie, but is stopped by a panic stricken Tyrone who drags him off to look at Kirkâs double jointed thumbs. He then explains that Steve is the father of Tracyâs child. ÎNice one my son,â says Jamie, Îthat was a close shave.â

Audrey comes in and sees Emily. She tells her sheâs heard about the summons and admires her for sticking to her guns, so in a spirit of reconciliation, offers to pay the council tax for her. Emily is outraged and shocked at what she calls a bribe, and thinks that Audrey is insensitive to offer it. Gail comes in and hears the tail end of this conversation. ÎWhat are you doing?â she asks her, Îall you can do is think about yourself. Youâre good at falling out with folk but youâre lousy at making up.â

They arrive to take Sunita off to theatre, so she asks for a minute with Dev. She tells him she thinks it was a good thing they didnât get too close, it was just one night. How terrible it would be if they had been married ten years and had lots of children. She wants him to carry on and be happy. ÎMarry me!â Dev blurts out, ÎI want you to be my wife.â Sunita just stares at him, ÎIâm trying to tell you something,â she insists. ÎPlease,â Dev begs. ÎNo,â she says quietly, and then they wheel her away, leaving Dev looking distraught.

And thatâs it for this episode.

Annie Logan

Hello, and welcome to Monday's second episode, in which long periods are taken up by Dev sitting around saying nothing.

We open in a hospital waiting room where Dev is putting money into a vending machine, with the look of a man trying to fill in time rather than one who is hungry or thirsty.

At the Baby Baldwins' house, feisty Frankie is shouting at Danny, who can't understand why he's getting the rollicking rather than Baby Baldwin Boy No 2 (OK, if you insist, I'll go and look up his name . . .it's Warren). Anyway, Frankie is angry at Danny for lying to her. The trouble is that she's believed Warren's version of events (personality clash with the coach) rather than Danny's (his boy was lying, chasing bird, drinking, missing training etc so they sacked him). To make it worse, she says, she's been bragging about her footballer son.

Vera and Tyrone come out of the Kabin. Ty is desperately trying to convince V to go to bingo early, "to get into the zone". Martin and Audrey are also in the street, discussing the way Audrey seems to have fallen out with everyone. Emily comes over and just about spits in her face. She is REALLY angry. Someone has paid her council tax and she knows it's Audrey. She assures Audrey that all that's happened is Emily is now more determined than ever to stop the council wasting money.

In the cafe, Jamie Baldwin is talking to Leanne and they are flirting a bit. He tells her that his brother has been dumped by Brentford. Candice comes in and Leanne encourages her to talk about what it's like having a footballer for a boyfriend. Then breaks it to her that Warren's not a professional footballer, just an unemployed one. Candice is almost as angry as Emily was in the previous scene. And as Candice goes off on a search-and-destroy mission, Leanne leans back and sighs: "Ahhh, spreading a little happiness makes the day go so much quicker."

In the hospital, Dev is still waiting. He's looking more and more like one of those SPCA pictures you see of malnourished donkeys which have been chained up for years.

The lads are gathering in the pub, ready for the first sign of Vera's video-player being left unattended. In another booth, Blanche is talking about the council meeting she's just been to: "No sooner had the meeting started than the Alf Roberts memorial fountain was out and the Alice Strudwick memorial public conveniences were in." Norris is happy -- "public" conveniences. Emily is confused. "Then why did Audrey pay my council tax?" Norris confesses that it was him. He has kept Emily out of jail. "You selfish, stupid little man," she tells him. He has taken away her right to stand by her principles. And jail "would be infinitely more desirable than sharing a house with you!"

Tracy has arrived at Ciaran's place and wonders why she's there. He persuades her to lie on the sofa with her eyes closed (this is Tracy, remember, it didn't take that much persuasion), then he covers her with £50,000 in crisp notes. "It's even nicer next to the skin," she says, tucking a couple of hundred down her front. Of course, then she challenges him to get it back.

At the hospital, Dev is still waiting. Steve has dropped off a fare at the hospital and offers to wait too.

The boys are still in the pub, waiting for Vera to be gone to bingo. Warren is so excited by the whole thing he can't resist telling a bloke he meets at the bar all about the video they are about to see. Sadly for him, the bloke is Ken. As Vera comes into the pub and the boys head the other way, he heads them off at the door and confiscates the video.

[break]

In Ciaran's flat, he and Tracy are clearing up the money. At least, they are until he feels the need to check that she's not trying to get away with any of it, and that means a thorough search . . .

At the hospital, Dev is convinced Sunita won't make it through the surgery. He's also berating himself for asking her to marry him -- which admission startles Steve.

Deirdre is sitting out on a garden bench in a yard. Is this the back of the house? It seems it must be, because Ken comes out and tells her about the videotape, though he interrupts himself mid-story to ask Deirdre how many cigarettes she's had (this is the first). They work out that Tracy probably doesn't know that Dev taped them together. And the thought hits them both that he might have filmed other women . . . Tracy comes in and seems quite pleased to see the videotape. "I made it for Dev," she tells her parents. "You might like it," she tells Ken, but she doesn't think Deirdre will. She then leaves them to babysit while she goes off somewhere with the tape.

Leanne dashes into the pub and just manages to say "Could I have a lemonade and a G&T and a ticket for the fireworks please," before Candice follows her in, walks over to the Baldwin family and the fireworks start. She asks if he's not training today, and talks about his ankle, then mentions that someone from Manchester United was asking about him. "Was there?" asks Warren. "No," she screams. "I'm lying, like you are!" She accuses him of being the kind of bloke who can only get a girl by saying he's a professional footballer. "Well, I'm dumping you an' all!" And as she stalks out of the Rovers, Candice does not realise that she has just made herself a mortal enemy -- Frankie.

In the hospital, Dev is getting more and more down, until the doctor comes and tells him "Everything went OK" (that's a technical medical term, I think), though it took longer than expected.

Tyrone and Kirk are sitting near the chippy tucking into some fried stuff when they see Tracy heading their way. Kirk wants to run, but Tyrone points out that, though Kirk could probably get away, he could never outpace Tracy. As she gets to them they both start gibbering apologies. They were just having a laugh. They would never disrespect Tracy. They both respect her. They've got nothing but respect for her. She shuts them up with a look and tells them the tape was made for Dev and she didn't expect anyone else to see it. But she is intrigued by the amount of interest there is in it -- it's flattering. Kirk says, "I've always admired you from afar." Tracy says she might be prepared to lend it to them for one night only, if they say please (they do, very quickly), "and beg like a dog." Tyrone is shocked by this, but Kirk is already sitting there with his tongue out and panting and slobbering, front paws up by his chin.

Audrey arrives in the Rovers and as she orders a G&T we can hear Blanche in the background: "Do you want me to tell her? I don't mind." But Emily knows she must face Audrey herself. Poor Audrey suddenly realises she has Gail on one side of her and Audrey on the other. "Just a minute," she says, and takes a good swig of her drink. She is surprised that Emily does not want to argue but is there to apologise. The apology is accepted. But she is stunned when Emily tells her that the council has decided not to build anything to honour Alf at all. Gail steps in to sympathise with her Mum and they make up.

On a sofa in front of a video player, the lads wait in anticipation of something special. We can't see the pictures, but we can hear the commentary. It's India playing in a test match. "Fast forward! Fast forward!" shouts Kirk. But it's all the same. Tracy had put together a tape of India's cricketing highlights!

Sunita is a bit groggy, but that doesn't stop Dev rabbiting on about how sorry he is and how he's going to watch her grow old. There will be no more goodbyes, he says.

The end.

Margaret Carr

Corrie Report By: Michaela Davis Wednesday 18th August

Hi all we open with Dev and Sunita in hospital and Dev is packing Sunita's bag for her, Sunita comes in to the room and says to Dev you look move exhausted than I do but Dev says don't worry about me. Dev takes Sunita bag and goes to get the car. Sunita says thank you to Dev and hugs him.

Tracey turns up at Ciaran's with Baby Amy in tow but Ciaran tells her that it is not a good time but Tracey says that she as missed him and kisses Ciaran, Ciaran says he is busy but Tracey says that she will not disturb him unless he wants her to, Ciaran asks if she wants a brew and Tracey says that she does not want to be any trouble and sits down and looks at Ciaran plans for the restaurant. Ciaran asks Tracey if she did miss him but she says no. Ciaran says that Charlie is starting work on the restaurant tomorrow. Tracey takes Ciaran's money as a joke and puts it into Amy's changing bag Ciaran goes to pour the milk but finds that he as run out of milk, Tracey offers to go and get some but Ciaran says what about Amy, Tracey says that Amy is fine as she is asleep and that she will only be 5 minutes, but Ciaran says what if she wakes up and Tracey says to Ciaran to tell Amy about his plans for the restaurant as it always sends her to sleep.

Leanne and Jamie are in the cafe talking about Leanne's interview later that day, Vera brings Jamie a cup of tea and tells him to drink it while it is still hot. Tracey comes in to the cafe and orders a cup of coffee and a high calorie cake, Roy tells her to sit down and he will bring it over to her. Frankie comes in and tells Leanne that she as been looking for her and Leanne says that she was not hiding, Frankie says that her Warren heart is broken because of her, but Leanne tells her that Candice had a right to know what was going on. Roy asks them if they could keep it down a bit. Frankie told Leanne what Warren was going to tell Candice and shouts at Leanne to look at her when she is talking to her. But Leanne says sorry I was watching that pig fly by but Frankie tells her that her card is marked but Leanne says why ain't I scared then and leaves Jamie sitting in the cafe and Frankie just standing there.

Ciaran is left holding baby Amy who is crying for her mother, Ciaran goes to change Amy but smells her first and says to her that he should get someone better to change her.

Charlie and Jack are talking in the Rovers and Charlie says that he cannot help Jack out on his team as he as not got the legs for it but says that Liz as and that she is game for anything, then Deirdre walks in to the pub and Charlie says even better when he looks at her legs, Jack asks them to join his team but Liz and Deirdre just look at each other.

Danny, Frankie and Warren are also in the pub talking about Leanne and Candice, Frankie is slogging Leanne off saying that she humiliate Warren but Danny says what and Warren had nothing to do with it, Warren says that he was going to tell Candice about being dropped by his team, and Danny said in which century. But Frankie thinks that Danny is taking Leanne's side and tells Danny to watch he does not get splinters from sitting on the fence. Warren walks off as his parents argue.

Jack is talking about bowls and still trying to get Liz and Deirdre to join his team but Liz says he will have to try to do better if he wants them to join so Jack offers then 2 glasses of wine to join, but Deirdre says make it a bottle of wine and they will, Jack agrees.

Ciaran sees Charlie coming out of the Rovers and says that he as the money, Charlie asks him where it is and Ciaran looks away, Charlie says no money no work but Ciaran tells him to relax and that the money is in his flat, he tells Charlie to give him 10 minutes but Charlie tells him that the clock it ticking and walks away, Ciaran sees Deirdre also coming out of the Rovers and tells her that Amy needs her, Deirdre asks where Tracey is but Ciaran says he does not know. Deirdre says that she cannot take Amy as she is playing bowls but Ciaran says sorry and leaves Amy with her.

Dev brings Sunita home and Ciaran says it is nice to see her home and Sunita says it is good to be home, Ciaran says that he does not know if god remembers him but he prayed for her and Sunita said that it worked. Ciaran says to Sunita and Dev i know you have been through hell, but the future is going well he then kisses Sunita and walks away. Dev says to Sunita that he as been thinking however she wants to move on his fine with him as it is her happiness that counts, Sunita says she will see him later about 7pm.

Deirdre leaves Amy with Roy and Roy takes her for a walk leaving Vera in the cafe alone.

Ciaran is in the flat looking for his money he says that he is going to kill Tracey and he telephones her and asks her what she has done with his money.

BREAK

Ciaran and Tracey are knocking on Deirdre 's door Ciaran is not happy with her and Tracey says how was she suppose to know that he was going to give Amy to her mother and Ciaran said that she was only going out to get a pint of milk not a whole cow, Tracey says his money is safe and not to get out of his pram, Tracey says try and think were did Deirdre says she was going and Ciaran said that she said something about bowls, so they head off to the bowling area.

Roy as taking Amy to see Haley and Haley says that Amy is getting more beautiful every day but Roy says it could not be possible giving the development of the face features but in Amy's case it is true. Deirdre bowls but misses a lot and Jack is not happy he calls Haley over saying this is a bowling green not a cr�che, Roy says he will leave. Fiz says to Deirdre you should have brought you guide dog with you and Sonia said she did but they would not let her bring it on the green. Jack is not happy especially when Liz falls over after she bowls and all the girls start to laugh. But Jack says that Liz is better than Deirdre but Deirdre says that she did better but the girls said that he is only looking at Liz's legs. Haley is next to bowl but before she can Ciaran and Tracey run-on to the green shouting where is Amy to Deirdre but Deirdre tells her that Roy as Amy and they have just missed him. Jack shouts at the team ok lets start again.

Charlie asks Dev if he is ok and asks if Sunita is ok and Dev says yes she is up stairs resting and Charlie says as a joke you gave her the day off you must be going soft in your old age, he says to Dev if he see Ciaran to tell him he as blown it he tells Dev that the man is a joke and Sunita dumping him at the alter was the best thing she ever did,

Roy is in the cafe reading to Amy when Vera shows him a pie with a face on it she has made and says that she as even made a slogan for it "Grinning and Filling", but Roy says that he is trying to educate Amy, Vera asks what is he reading to Amy and Roy says it is about Alexander the Great but Vera says it is no good as it has not got any teddy bears in it. Roy goes to change Amy but he finds the money in her changing bag just as Tracey and Ciaran come in, Tracey says that she will take Amy now but Roy says that Deirdre asked him to baby-sit but Tracey tells him he is not needed now. Roy looks really worried as Tracey and Ciaran leave the cafe.

Leanne as a job interview in a nightclub and the boss asks her why she wants to work in a nightclub, and Leanne says that she likes loud music and that she is good with people and the boss says yes he can see that while he is looking at her breasts, he says that he excepts good time keeping and trust from all his staff but he as not stop looking at her breasts once. He says that he see himself as a father figure to all his staff and Leanne says i don't have to call you daddy do I, he says no Mr. Otter man will do until they get to know each other better. Leanne just smiles, he asks Leanne when can she start and Leanne says whenever so Mr. Ottherman says Tomorrow then, he offers Leanne a glass of champagne but Leanne says she can't as she as to meet her boyfriend and she leaves.

Charlie is on his mobile phone saying that his other job as falling through, Ciaran turns up but Charlie tells him that he had his chance and that he is looking for real jobs with real money, Ciaran shows him his money and Charlie tells the person on the other end of the phone that he will phone him back. Charlie tells Ciaran he will do the work and to just keep the money rolling in and Ciaran tells him not to worry and just to be on site first thing in the morning.

Roy is worried and Haley asks him what is wrong and he tells her about the money that he found in Amy's changing bag and he thinks that Tracey might be selling Amy again but Haley tells him that is a horrible thing to say but Roy is really worried about it.

Dev goes to Sunita's and Sunita as done her flat up all nice with Indian throws and tells Dev that tonight he is her lord and to enjoy it while it lasts.

Leanne and Jamie are in the Rovers talking about her Interview and Jamie tells her to watch out for the boss but Leanne tells her that she can look after her self in which Jamie agrees with. He tells her that he is sorry about what Frankie said to her this morning. But Leanne tells him it is not his fault.

Jack is very tense as his team is not very good and Ciaran buys him a pint of beer and offers Jack a bet, Jack accepts the bet as long as Ciaran does not tell Vera about it.

Sunita as made Dev some Blue Mountain coffee which she tells him cost her £7.00 but Dev is crying and Sunita asks him what is wrong and he says he was scared he might lose her, but Sunita tells him that the night before her operation she remembered what her granddad once told her "as we climb the mountain to our dreams we should look behind us at out footsteps to see if we have left any part of us behind" but Sunita says for the first time in my life i am not looking back, Dev says what now and Sunita says we will drink the very expense coffee i bought she gives Dev a cup and offers him the sugar but in the sugar bowl is a ring. Dev takes the ring and says that he should be doing this but Sunita says that she is only finishing off what he had started and she puts the ring on Dev's finger and asks him to marry her. Dev says yes and Sunita says a kiss would be nice but Dev gets on his knee and kiss Sunita but she turns her head away and says thank you to Dev for making her dreams come true and then she kiss Dev on the mouth.

We open with Leanne asking Danny and Frankie if there are any messages for Jamie. They donât understand what she means and she breaks the news to them that she and Jamie will be working together from now on. They donât look happy about it!

Roy and Hayley are in the cafŽ debating where the money in Amyâs backpack came from and looking rather menacingly at Ciaran. Katy is worried about her impending exam results but Martin is trying to reassure her that everything will be fine. Tommy comes in and offers his idea of support Î saying that if she doesn't get good results it will be Martin's fault! He then threatens him again.

Leanne is talking to her new boss, Bobby, but he seems more interested in her chest! She realises this and plays up to it.

Dev and Sunita are in his flat deciding on her Îbiggest worryâ Î the right colour for the kitchen. Dev says she can have whatever she wants which makes her smile.

Tracy is trying to apologise to Ciaran for taking the money and convince him it was a joke. Roy walks in and Ciaran tells Tracy to keep her mouth shut in case he saw something he shouldnât have. Roy says that they have been inseparable recently and Kieran tells him to Îkeep your observations in your jotter with your train numbers and stuffâ (handbags at dawn!) Tracy gets Roy to look after Amy.

Leanne is being shown the ropes by her boss when Jamie warns her about him. Leanne starts to look uncomfortable around him.

Katy has got her exam results (C, C, D, and D). Sheâs disappointed because she needs all Aâs to get into medical school and sheâs worried about what her dad will say. Martin says not to bother worrying because heâll blame him anyway but he tries to persuade her to tell him.

BREAK

Leanneâs been given her uniform (if thatâs what you call it!) Bobbyâs trying to get her to change in his office with him when Jamie sees it and runs in to stop him. After a bit of a fight, with Leanne finally stopping Jamie by biting his arm, they both get fired.

Roy is searching through Amyâs pram to try and find a clue about the money but he finds nothing. He has convinced himself that Tracy is trying to sell Amy again.

Leanne is furious at Jamie for getting her sacked but he says he was only trying to help her. He gives up trying to reason with her and storms off.

Blanche is talking to Dev and Sunita about the wedding. Sheâs saying how lucky she is to have her hands on all his money and shops when she Îwalks away from himâ. She goes off on a tangent and eventually leaves the shop. When Todd comes in they ask for his opinion on marriage but he says heâs probably the wrong person to ask! Danny and Frankie come in and he congratulates them. Frankie is less than pleased and isnât afraid to show it. However she brightens up when she learns that Maya trashed Devâs flat before she left.

Katy lies to her dad about her results to prevent Îworld war threeâ! She says she got straight Aâs. Roy and Hayley are trying to get information about Tracy and Ciaranâs relationship from Kevin. Blanche jumps in and says that itâs none of their business and they should be grateful that they see Amy at all.

Frankie and Jamie are talking about how Leanneâs getting on in the job when she sees the bite mark on his arm. She tells him he canât work there any more but he says heâs already quit.

Karen is talking to Steve all about Devâs wedding and what theyâll do at it, much to Steveâs dismay. She says that he will be best man which makes her best woman. She says they have got to send them a big congratulations card and the look on Steveâs face is priceless! Tommy gives Katy a cheque for £200 as congratulations for her results. She feels guilty so she starts to tell him the truth but her mum stops her. Leanne offers Jamie a drink to say sorry but he isnât interested. She says she believes that he was only trying to help her so he accepts her apology.

Dev and Sunita are lying on the sofa eating grapes and talking about the wedding and their future. Sunita is upset about the time that they wasted loving other people. Dev starts to say that maybe they needed all the obstacles before they could get to each other but Sunita plants a kiss on his lips before he can finish. He asks that when they get married, any time she wants him to shut up she should kiss him and she agrees.

Hayley and Roy are trying to decide on the best way to ask Tracy about the money. Leanne and Jamie share a kiss and laugh about Bobby. Kieran starts shouting at Roy and Hayley because they invaded Tracyâs privacy. He tells them what the money is for and tells them to keep their noses out of his business. He also threatens to stop them from seeing Amy if they donât keep out of his way. Leanne and Jamie decide to go elsewhere for a drink and bump into his Danny and Frankie on the way out. Danny says he looks loved up but she says he better not be with Îthat trailer trashâ!

The End

Helen Edgar

We start tonightâs episode with Danny and Frankie. Frankie is convinced that someone slept on the sofa. Warren then comes in and says that he slept on the sofa and whilst Frankie is asking why ö Leanne and Jamie walk downstairs together. Frankie looks aghast.

Vera and Audrey are walking down the street and Vera is requesting a top stylist ö and is told that she will be getting Audrey.

Meanwhile Frankie is not having Leanne in her house and throws her out on the street.

Martin and Katy are walking down the street and Martin is asking why he is getting the silent treatment. Katy admits that she lied to her dad about her results and he gave her £200. Martin is really cross with her and asks why she never tells the truth. He tells her that she is the one that starts things and he is the one that always ends up getting punched.

Karen and Steve walk out of the flat ö he is treating her to a day of pleasure and she is hoping that it involves lots of shopping and fancy eating.

Frankie is laying the law down and forbidding Jamie from bringing Îskirtâ home. Both Danny and Jamie want her to apologise to Leanne as she was really rude to her. She refuses to say sorry and Vera agrees with her.

Steve tells Karen that he is going to cook her a fancy meal. She says that that is not what she calls Karenâs Day of Pleasure and she storms off.

Jack is in the cafŽ complementing Hayley on her bowling skills. Jamie and Leanne are sitting there when Frankie walks in and apologises for her behaviour. She says that she would like to start from scratch. Jamie then asks if she can stay over and Frankie tells him not to push it.

Katy is passing Tommyâs house and tries to tell him about her results but he is not listening and says that he thinks she is brilliant and has so much to look forward to.

The Bowls Team meet in the Rovers. They are sitting with Karen who is annoyed that Liz is there too. Karen is put out when they say that she is the outsider. They all leave leaving Karen there alone.

Frankie and Vera are in the hairdressers. Frankie mentions Leanne and Maria is delighted to spill the beans on Leanne past.

Danny is in the pub on the phone booking a posh restaurant. Karen is next to him and is jealous. Frankie walks in and whisks him over the other side of the pub.

Blanche, Norris and Emily are sitting in the pub ö all gathered for a game of Poker. Audrey arrives late as Vera got her head stuck in the drier. They start their gambling ö Emily and Audrey put down 30 pence and Norris starts with five pounds. Audrey and Emily look worried and ask for the rules to be explained.

Katy walks into the flat and Martin asks whether she has told her dad the truth. She admits that she couldnât. She tries to convince him that they may get away with it. Martin looks on in disbelief knowing there will be trouble. She walks off telling him that she hates him sometimes.

Frankie has called Jamie to the pub. He walks in to find out what is going on.

The bowls team come in and pretend that they have lost. Ciaran looks pleased and asks for his £100 only to be told that they are joking and they won.

Blanche, Emily, Norris and Audrey are still playing poker and can tell when each other is losing.

Jamie is looking nonplussed about what Frankie has said. He tells her he doesnât care about the gossip and she demands that he dumps Leanne.

Karen goes into the flat and tries to apologise. Steve doesnât understand why she acts like she does ö and she admits that she doesnât either she just always wants more. He offers to cook but she says no she wants to go out to a posh restaurant. He tells her its chips or he cooks. She goes for him cooking.

Jack announces that there next match is against the Slaughterman Arms. He asks for his money from Ciaran who offers double or quit. Jack accepts immediately.

Norris etc are still gambling (very dull).

Leanne comes in to meet Jamie and she immediately spots something is wrong. She asks him what is wrong and he says that he has heard the gossip. She admits she has taken drugs in the past but not any more and nothing to put him in danger. He then asks her if she is the Îlocal bikeâ. She storms off.

Steve lays out his romantic meal and Karen has dressed for the occasion. They sit down to enjoy Îpan friedâ prawns. She immediately spits it out as it is still frozen and then is delighted that this means they have to go out for dinner. She tells him that Înice timeâ equals Îsplash cashâ.

Back to the tedious game of poker. Norris loses to Blanche. They could all tell that he was struggling because he was playing with his ears.

Leanne goes to sit next to Jamie. She tells him that her past is not a secret but as they havenât been going out that long she hasnât had the time to tell him everything and didnât want to come across as freaky by blurting it all out. He tries to apologise and she demands to know who he has been speaking to. When she finds out it was Frankie she goes storming round to the house. They have a massive row and Leanne dumps Jamie and tells Frankie to watch her back.

And thatâs it for tonight. Its also my last episode as updater. Iâm passing my Sundays over to Duncan Lindsay who will be with you next week.

Many thanks, Mary Earlam

Hi everyone, here is the first episode of the evening, sorry for the delay, had a few computer problems last night.

We open in the street, with Todd coming out of the corner shop carrying milk, and wandering along to his own front door and going inside. Heâs watched from across the street by Karl.

Also coming down the street are Karen and Steve. Sheâs smartly dressing in a tight fitting jacket and cap, and Steve is asking her why she needs more clothes, sheâs already got lots. She says that she needs more, yesterday they did things his way, today they are doing things her way, itâs the law of physics ö she thinks! Steve is worried that as she has pulled a sickie, sheâll be seen, but she says that she told Danny Baldwin that Steve was having a molar out and needed her to hold his hand. Steve is worried they will fritter the money. ÎSteve,â she tells him, Îit hurts me to think that you think that money spent on me is frittering.â Steve then suggests they go and buy each other a little gift. ÎA big gift,â says Karen. ÎThe perfect gift,â Steve tells her, Îand thatâs it.â That pleases her and they go off smiling.

At the Baldwinâs lunch table they are discussing the fact that Jamieâs girlfriend is an ex drug addict and marriage wrecking nymphomaniac, according to Frankie. Danny tells her they all have their pasts, but Frankie reckons hers was in modeling, not slapping her veins to stick a needle in. (She seems to have conveniently forgotten that she had an affair, and nearly wrecked her own marriage.) The boys start squabbling, until Danny tells them to shut up, he came home to eat in peace.

Over at the Battersbyâs, Leanne is moaning to Les, who is ironing, about Frankie. Leanne says she doesnât want to go out with a bloke who is tied to his motherâs apron strings. Les reckons he is crying on her shoulder as they speak. Les thinks Frankie must have been very young when she had Jamie, and that makes her a scrubber, but Leanne informs him that sheâs his stepmother. Les spits on the iron, claiming there is something wrong with it. Leanne takes over, and discovers that the iron is not even plugged in.

In the cafŽ, Roy is congratulating Jack on getting the bowls team through to the final. As they discuss the team, we see a lady clad in a gray raincoat sitting at a table jotting down notes in a notebook. Roy asks Jack if he thinks the girls will win. Jack says he has got them off the three main cornerstones of life, booze, nookie and fags, it gets him out of the house and Vera off his back ö he explains that she has become insatiable, he has to beat her off with his paper. Royâs face takes on an expression of distaste as he ponders on this.

Karl knocks on the Grimshaw front door, which is opened by Eileen. He asks if Todd is in, but Eileen tells him that she doesnât think he would want to see him. Todd comes to the door and invites Karl in, but wonders why heâs there. Karl tells him he is so sorry that his son died, and heâs been thinking about Todd and wanted to see if heâs ok. Todd tells him heâs fine. They chat some more and decide that they are mates.

In the Rovers, Liz compliments Penny on her tan and asks if itâs out of a bottle. ÎOh no,â says Penny, Îweâve just come back from Palma.â ÎOh, I love Portugal,â says Liz. Penny looks puzzled, ÎItâs Spain.â ÎOh, that Palma,â mutters Liz. Ciaran brings Pennyâs drinks over then, and tells her heâll come over to the table shortly so they can discuss things. ÎNo, donât,â says Penny, as she hasnât told Mike about their business venture yet.

Penny sits with Mike and starts talking about inviting some people over that they met on holiday. Mike isnât keen, he knows he said it would be a good idea at the time, but he was relaxed, and anyway, a man doesnât think straight in trousers above the knee.

Back at the Grimshawâs, Todd is telling Karl about his childhood life on the tenth floor of a block of flats, and a school trip to the Peak district. Heâs glad Karl has come, and part of him wants to be held by him, but another part tells him itâs way too messy, itâs in the past and he should leave it.

Karen and Steve have arrived back in the street in a torrential downpour. She is wearing different clothes from the ones she went out in. She goes into the Rovers, but sends Steve, clutching a variety of designer label carrier bags, back to the flat to wait for a delivery.

In the pub, Hayley scuttles over to the girls in the bowls team and confiscates their alcoholic drinks so that Jack doesn't see them drinking. Todd and Karl come in and walk past Les who is standing at the bar. ÎWhoops a daisy,â says Les, Îdonât drop the soap lads, you know what I mean?â Eileen is at the bar and tells Todd to ignore the prat in denim. Les asks Todd, loudly, if heâs going to have the hotpot, or does he fancy the faggots. Karen is showing the other girls her purchases, as Frankie and Liz look on from the bar. Frankie reckons Danny is paying Karen too much money, and she canât walk in those shoes. Liz tells her she always walks like that. Karen comes to the bar and tells Liz she can see she doesnât wear Îlabels.â Liz tells her she has plenty of labels, ÎYes,â says Karen, Îand they all say ÎMade by trollops and worn by tarts.â Things look like turning nasty but Ciaran steps in and gets Karenâs drink.

Just then Jamie and Leanne walk in, and are frowned upon by Frankie, and then Charlie comes in, looking as if someone has just thrown a bucket of water over him. (Itâs raining outside.) He gives Ciaran a report on what is happening at the restaurant, so of course Ciaran is desperate to see it. ÎYou donât mind, do you?â he asks Liz, ÎIâll only be five minutes.â Liz turns to Charlie, ÎCan you believe heâs trying to set up his own restaurant?â she asks him. Roy has come up to the bar and hears this, and tells her itâs not the first time. Looking worried, Roy turns and sees Penny and Mike at a table. He goes over to them and tells them that he has had business dealings with Ciaran before and he was incredibly dishonest. He advises Penny to proceed with caution, and Penny looks shocked.

Frankie is talking to Jamie and Leanne about the fact that they are back together. ÎYou got a problem with that?â demands Leanne. Jamie says Frankie is Îmade upâ as the northerners would say. Îand what would you southerners say?â asks Leanne, with a sweet smile on her face. ÎBreak Îis Îeart anâ Iâll break yer legs?â suggests Frankie.

Mike and Penny are having a debate on who is better at running the successful business. Mike gets exasperated and leaves the table.

Frankie asks Liz to look at the state of the bowls team. She says theyâre like Girls Aloud (British pop group) with stretch marks. Liz sniggers for a moment and then remembers. ÎHey, Iâm on that bowls team,â she tells her. Sonia, who is standing close by, leans over and tells them that one of their number has had a sex change. Frankie looks around, trying to guess which one. ÎHayley,â Sonia tells her, Îshe used to be called Harold and played in loads of menâs bowls teams.â Meanwhile, unbeknown to them all, the raincoat clad lady is eavesdropping. When Sonia spots her and asks what sheâs looking at, the lady leaves. Karen tells Fizz that by now Steve will have taken delivery of the present she bought him, and he has bought her the present to end all presents. She rushes off out.

Les starts becoming very unpleasant and loud mouthed, making comments about Todd and Karl. Eileen tells him to put a sock in it, and Liz tells him sheâs warning him. ÎOr what?â demands Les, Îyouâre going to kick me out are you, and not these faggots?â Karl is all for leaving, but Todd refuses. Todd then tells the assembled pub that if thereâs anyone there who thinks he is not the devil incarnate, to back him up and tell Les to shut up. ÎShut up, Les,â mumbles Hayley, ÎShut up, Les,â follows Roy. Les says he might have known that those two freaks would stick up for Todd. Then Frankie says, ÎShut up, Les,â and one by one the whole pub tells Les the same thing. Les walks out in disgust.

Over in the Macdonald residence, Steve is watching his new widescreen tv when Karen bursts in, wet. ÎItâs like a monsoon out there,â she gasps. Then she wants to know where her pressy is. Steve rips his eyes away from his new toy and grabs a bag which he hands to Karen. She pulls out some lacy underwear. Then he hands her another present, a box from a jewelers. She opens it, obviously delight. ÎBling flippinâ bling, Steve,â she chortles.

Jack walks into the Rovers, drenched from the heavy rain. He tells the bowls team that heâs cancelled tonightâs practice. As he walks over to the jukebox, his place is taken by the raincoat clad lady. She tells them her name is Edie Bagshaw, player manager for the Slaughtermanâs Arms bowls team. It has come to her attention that one of their team used to be a man and played under the name of Harold Patterson for many years. Mr. Pattersonâs name is still down for the East Lancashire Semi Pro Guild, which means he shouldnât be playing for them at all. ÎOh no,â wails Sonia, ÎWhat have I done?â After the departure of Ms. Bagshaw, Hayley looks visibly upset. ÎWhat am I, just a bit of gossip, a bit of tittle tattle?â she cries, and rushes out, followed by Roy.

She flees back to the cafŽ, where she sits in the dark. ÎCanât be a mother, canât play bowls, what can I do?â she asks, as Roy comes in. Poor Roy doesnât know what to say to her, he loves her so much. Then he tells her, ÎYou let them win, you ran away. If Todd can stand up to them, why canât you?â

Karen, wearing a jewel encrusted tiara and long, dangly earrings, is sitting with Steve watching their new tv. Just then the doorbell rings. Steve goes downstairs and opens the front door. Thereâs a man standing in the rain, with his back to the door. He turns and asks, ÎIs Karen in?â Steve calls her. She comes to the door smiling, but her face falls when she sees the visitor. ÎKaren,â he says. ÎDad!â she murmurs.

And thatâs all for the first episode.

Anne Logan

Despite Karen's protestations, Steve lets her soaking wet Dad into the flat. The story becomes clear. His name is Malcolm Phillips. He has disowned Karen, but now he has come to find her because her mother is very ill -- in fact, she is dying. Karen says she's not interested.

Outside the Rovers, Todd and Karl have had a drink and are parting. They say it was good to see each other, hug and go their separate ways.

At the McDonalds', Steve wants to get a towel for Karen's Dad, but she wants to just chuck him out. Steve says that whatever's gone on in the past, they have to get it sorted. She says her father is stubborn and unfeeling, but he protests that he has dedicated his life to the wellbeing of others, by showing them a better way. It's clear he has very strong religious feelings. He says he can see the kind of life she's chosen. "Yes, a happy one," she says. She goes to get "a fag and a drink -- that'll send him on his way." Steve asks his father-in-law to leave a phone number, at least. He tells Karen her Dad came all this way in the rain, so she should talk to him.

In the pub, Roy is telling Hayley she doesn't have to do anything. But she insists she will, and she goes to apologise to the rest of the bowls teams. She tells them it's true she was registered as Harold, and she should have taken steps to prevent this situation happening. Sonia thinks she should go to the papers, but that's the last thing Hayley wants. She offers to help them any way she can off the greens. Roy has to go to get a moussaka ready for the morning, and leaves Hayley with the others. Jack is restless and gets up to go and call Colin Crowe, the local chairman of the women's bowling.

Ciaran and Charlie are in the shell of the new restaurant when Mike comes in, demanding to know why Ciaran is trying to rip of his girlfriend. Charlie makes a hasty exit and Ciaran tells Mike he's not trying to rip anyone off, but he's working his butt off to get this place off the ground. It's going to be "the best casual dining experience in the north-west." Pardon? He tells Mike that the business advice centre suggested he put that sort of thing into his business plan. "You have a business plan?" asks Mike. He asks to see it.

Les is giving Cilla a back rub, followed by some Vitamin L -- a can of lager! "Why don't we go away -- just the two of us?" asks Cilla. "You mean just the three of us," reminds Les. But Cilla says that at Chesney's age you don't need a break because every day is like a holiday. Les says she can't leave Chesney on his own. "Of course I can -- I've done it before." Les points out that Chesney is only 10 and it's against the law to leave him home alone. Cilla seems to think Les might agree if they only left the boy for a weekend, and eventually wheedles and cajoles until Les agrees they can leave Chesney with Fizz, if she'll take him.

Jack has been on the phone to Colin Crowe and has good news and bad. Transsexuals are not barred from the competition. In fact, there is a team called Fanny's Trannies. The problem is that Hayley is still registered in the men's league and the rules say she must resign from that at least 28 days before registering in the women's league. When you've endured major surgery and being disowned by your family, these things slip your mind, Hayley points out. The others are all set to give up and Fizz leaves, but Jack pleads with the others to stay.

Out in the street, Cilla asks Fizz if she'll do a favour. The answer is a flat No. Even when Cilla tries to use emotional blackmail ("I can't believe you'd abandon your own brother") Fizz sticks to her guns. She can't believe her mother would abandon her own son. Cilla says she can't take Chesney with her because Les wants it to be just a romantic break for the two of them.

Karl is sitting at the bus stop when Martin approaches him very aggressively. Karl reacts with similar aggression. He says he made allowances last time because Martin was grieving, but now it's clear Martin has a problem with gays. "Us queers can do the bashing, too!" he warns Martin, in case Martin ever lifts a finger against him.

Steve is trying to get Karen to explain more about her childhood. He can't understand why, when her Dad made the effort to see her, Karen isn't moved by the news that her Mum is dying. "I could be dead as far as she is concerned," Karen says. Steve suggests her father must want to build bridges. "Well, when he's finished he can drop himself off one," she snorts. And she weeps on Steve's shoulder.

[break]

In the soon-to-be-best-casual-dining-experience-in-the-north-west, Mike has finished looking at the business plan and thinks its rubbish because Ciaran hasn't considered the competition (hmmmm, Delphine's is up-market, so he must mean the cafe and the chippie!). "It's the wrong business in the wrong location." But he is happy, because it's clear Ciaran is not trying to rip off Penny, and how she spends her inheritance is up to her.

In the flat, Karen is telling Steve she doesn't talk about her past because she wants to forget it. It was weird, she says. She was made to knock on doors trying to convert people until she was 14. After her parents became religious she didn't get any more toys. Other people on the estate were poor but didn't want to be, while her parents seemed to wallow in it. "It was a nasty way to grow up."

Back in the pub, Cilla tells Les that Fizz would be delighted to look after Chesney for them. Jack is trying to get everyone to think outside the box. He wants everyone to contribute ideas, no matter how whacky. Sonia suggests they nobble the other team, but Jack thinks they would get caught. Deirdre suggests they get a foreigner or a player on loan. Nope, they've got no money. Eileen suggests Jack dress up as a woman. They all laugh at first and then start to take it seriously. He's got good cheekbones, but he'd have to get his arms waxed. Eileen says it would be a way of sticking it to the bowls hierarchy. But Jack is sure he'd never pass as a woman. "I'm too masculine!" he says, urging them to think inside the box!

Karen is telling Steve that it was Linda Sykes who got her away from her parents. Linda saved her when she was being bullied for dressing strangely and Karen used to go to Linda's place to smoke and watch television. Until her Dad found out and when ballistic, calling her a whore and beating her. She moved out the next day, slept on Linda's sofa, got herself a Saturday job and tried to forget. Her parents blanked her when they saw her and disowned her.

Martin knocks on the Grimshaw front door and it is answered by Todd. In a very pointless conversation, Martin tells him that he was furious because of what Todd had done to Sarah, and he wasn't homophobic.

In the pub loo, Ciaran and Jack have a brief conversation about the team losing its best player. When Ciaran leaves, Jack looks thoughtfully into the mirror.

Back in the bar, Charlie check with Ciaran that the job is legit, because he's worried after hearing what Mike said about ripping off Penny. The bowls team is being told that if they want to win, they will have to make sacrifices. Go the extra mile. Leave no stone unturned. Oh, and bring along a few frocks and some make-up for Jack to try at the next practice session. Deirdre's jaw drops so far open they'll be lucky to get it closed before the next episode!

The end.

Margaret Carr

We open with Steve coming out of the bedroom to find Karen on the settee watching TV. Steve asks her how long has she been there, he asks her if she has had any sleep and Karen says she is all right. Steve offers to put the kettle on but Karen says no and tells him to go back to sleep, Karen says she is all right but Steve tells her she is not all right and sits down by her and tells her that she does not have too be brave in front of him. Karen says she is not being brave, brave was 10 years ago when she walked out that door. Steve tells Karen to let him help her that is what he is there for.

Sonia and Jack are in the cafŽ and Sonia is telling Jack that he can not back out, but Jack says that it takes a certain kind of man to pull It off being a female, but tells Hayley no offence to her. Hayley tells him it is not a lead in hello Dolly just a game of bowls, Jack is worried about fooling Vera and worried she might find out what he Is up to. Sonia tells him to store up worrying and two make sure that he is at Underworld by lunchtime, Jack asks why and Hayley says that if he is going to have a dress he has to have a dress fitting. Jack looks worried.

Steve and Karen are on the settee talking about how parents embarrass you just by being parents, Steve agrees. Karen says the difference was her did embarrass her and everyone was laughing has growing up you had to try and fit in with the gang. Over night she became the biggest freak show in town, the fat and ginger kids survived as when they were home they could shut the door and be themselves. But me· Karen can't carry on and Steve says it is all right baby. Karen tells Steve that there was a Easter bonnet parade at school and that she spent hours on hers and that she won and that she was so proud walking around the school hall with her rosette on and everyone was clapping, but my mum was in the back just shaking her head. Steve asks why and Karen says because I was proud and tells Steve that her mother made her burn her rosette and bonnet in their back garden. Karen tell Steve that she did not want to be centre of attention again, Steve says the wedding? And Karen says yes baby she tells Steve it was supposed to be her day to undo it all, my time where I could be proud and I did not have to burn my rosette. Steve says sorry, Karen tells him it is all in the past.

Frankie is in the shop buying coffee and says to Sunita suppose I will have to make do with this, holding the cheap coffee in her hand, Sunita asks what is wrong with it? Frankie says it is too E numbers away from gravy. She asks Dev if he knows the difference between cheap and the real thing, Dev says the best things in life are worth waiting for coffee included. Frankie asks if they have set a date yet but Sunita says she Is happy just being engaged and tells Frankie that is £2.60 please, Frankie tells Sunita that she would not be happy until she had a rock on her finger, Dev says he as not had time to get a ring but Sunita says that she is not that bothered and that Dev could give her a curtain ring as she is happy has got what she wanted, Frankie says oh sweet, could be Maya talking. Dev says Maya is history thankfully, Sunita says yes but for all her faults she did love you. Dev says she had a funny way of showing it and he had a lucky escape. Frankie looks at Dev and says that makes two of you and walks out of the shop.

Karen is sitting at the table playing with her food when Steve comes in and says that she should really eat something, Karen says Go on say it folks starving would be grateful of this and she tells Steve that once she sat for five hours to clean her plate of stone cold Irish stew, and I can still taste it now. Steve says look I am not trying to defend your mum and dad but I donât think you will get another chance at this, the chance to get some peace. Karen says what, like the peace they gave me, Steve says that this will be for your benefit not theirs. Remember they came to you, not you go to them, you will be in control. Karen says Steve nice try, Steve did my dad look like he had changed it might be on my terms but they will turn it around like they always do and I have come too far to hurt myself all over again, but Steve says he thinks that Karen will regret It, her chance to say all the things she wanted to say. Karen says what for, as my mum never listen to me like the night my dad beat me up anyway if she could change you can't undo 10 years in 10 minutes, Steve says Look I am on the switch all day but will get someone to cover but Karen says donât bother has she is not going to see her mother as she has made her mind up and she wonât regret it ever! Steve leaves for work.

Sonia tells fiz and Hayley she has put the material for Jackâs dress aside. Lovely pink, Fiz says it will go lovely with Jackâs eyes, Hayley tells the girls she does not think they should do it without Mr Baldwinâs say so but Fiz says he has not said ãnoä but Hayley says we have not asked him, Sonia says fair enough here is your chance. Danny comes out of his office and tells the girls to stop the troll and trouble and to get back on the machines. Danny tells the girls that he Is of out to meet a buyer in town and he will be checking output, Hayley says if the cat is a way I suppose, Angela asked them what they are at two and Fiz says donât ask no question, hear no lies.

Ciaran runs over to see Charlie about the business he asks Charlie if he has the revised lists for the building work, Charlie says he was just come into seeing him at the Rovers and asks if he had the day off today, Ciaran says ãnoä he is running late as he has been checking out glasses and cutlery and the price you have to pay for good stuff. Charlie says you donât want plastic cups when you are wining and dining a bird Ciaran says a man after my own heart, Charlie gives Ciaran his bill and says all the additional material and labour costs are included but Ciaran tells him it is 20 grant more and Ciaran asks if that is the cheapest he can do it for Charlie says I know you are on a tight budget but I have already slashed although margins and if I kept any more corners you may order the chipped forks and plastic cups Ciaran is not happy.

Steve is In the pub and Liz asks Steve if he knew any of Karenâs past Steve says ãno none of itä he says after everything we have been through he thought they were closer than ever, Liz says everyone has their secrets Liz tells here it is not his fault that she bottled it all up but Steve says that she should have been able to talk to him about it and he is worried what else is there that he does not know about Karen. But Liz tells him at least It is out In the open and you can do something about it, but Steve says he canât as he know she is her hurting and this hard face routine and she wonât let me in. Liz tells him that maybe she does not want her old life to ruin her new life, Steve says but it is.

Fiz, Sonia and Hayley are in underworld and Jack is behind a big screen getting undressed Jack tells the girls that Vera as the ears of a bat and a nose of a bloodhound, Jack says that when Vera go to bed at night that she hangs upside-down. Fiz says listen to him moaning and tells Jack you should be used to wearing a dress has you donât wear the trousers at home, Jack is complaining about the knickers and Hayley tells him they are called a G string but Jack says they are more like cheese wire as they are slicing up his backside. Jack asks if he can wear boxers but Fiz says no, Sonia says to Jack that some men find wearing female underwear very liberating Fiz pass Jack a blonde wig that she got for a ABBA night Jack says he looks stupid but Sonia tells him that it might suit him and it might make him look like Vera. Jack says that wonât fool anybody Hayley tells Jack to think female look female be female, all the girls look at Jack and Jack says Do you think I nee d bigger breasts Fiz, Sonia and Hayley laugh and Fiz says to Jack at least you are thinking female.

-------------------------------------------------------------------BREAK-------------------------------------------------------------

Fiz is putting make-up on Jack and Hayley tells Jack that his voice is all wrong and it sounds like a waste disposal unit and he should pitch it higher, Jack tells them that with the knickers they gave him his voice is his high as it will go, Sonia says come on try and repeat after me ãHello my name isä what is her name Sonia asks the other girls, Jack lights up a fag and Hayley tells him that he can not smoke in her but Jack says that he as only just lit it up and Fiz tells him that he will have to hide it if Mr. Baldwinâs come in and Jack says hide it were I canât hide a fag in this outfit, and Sonia says that is it her name Hideafag perfect. Sonia say Hi my name is Hideafag please to meet you I am sure, Jack tries to copy her in a female voice, Sonia says she wonât break any glass but it will do. Fiz puts some scent on Jack but Jack does not want any on but Hayley tells him he needs it as it is part of being a women, Jack looks in the mirror and says that h e as slept with worse, Fiz asks Jack if he can walk like a female and Hayley tells him that it is like taking tiny steps like gliding. Jack tries it so Hayley puts a book on to his head and tells him to try again but not to let the book fall off, ,Sonia tells him to think of Jack Lemon in some like it hot ãI'm a girl I'm a girlä

Danny comes back and asks who behind them and is she smoking Fiz tells Danny it is Hayleyâs sister he tells Hayley that she knows the rules and to get her out as they have already had one fire is underworld, Jack believes underworld in a dress saying I'm a girl I'm a girl he goes to go home but sees Tyrone coming out So Jack goes in the shop but Tyrone follow, Tyrone asks Dev about stuff to make your ironing smell nice as Frankie swears by it, but Dev ease on the phone so Tyrone asks Jack but Jack says ãnoä Dev tells Tyrone to try in town Sunita comes out of the back room and asks Jack if he needs any help he says no thank you, Dev asks if Sunita min ds not having in a ring and Sunita says of course has all she wants Is him, Jack leaves the shop, but Sunita says the ring would be nice as it is tradition Dev asks her If tradition and history are important although, Sunita says that she has never thought of it but yes and maybe she is an old-fashioned girl when it comes down to it. Dev telephones Maya say in the need to talk.

Ciaran goes to see a small business adviser called Ray he needs 20 grand more but Ray says ãnoä as he as looked at Ciaranâs credit history and it is bad as he has had loan after loan, but Ciaran says he kept getting letters offering him money and what was he supposed to do. Ciaran says to Ray that you were happy enough to take my cheque for £50,000 the advisor says yes but you withdrawn it all in a couple of days and we donât believe in cash deals with work men, but Ciaran tells him that it is not like that and the only reason he took it out was because he new it would get his girlfriend going and he tells Ray that one day he should open up his safe and it would be the best investment he would ever have.

Jack is in a house when Vera and Tyrone coming and Tyrone asks Jack if he has had any luck with the horses Jack says no he kept as many as pocket and Vera says it is the first time for everything, Vera picks up Jackâs dress from the table thinking it is whether Frankieâs and says she has most to do then Vera tells Jack that she can smell womenâs perfume and tells Jack that he better not be up to no good Tyrone says he Is off to the pub, Jack gets up to join him but Vera stops him and says the perfume is all over him, Jack tries to explain himself to Vera by saying that he had a shave but has his glasses were steamed up he picked up perfume by mistake but Vera tells him that is smells nothing like her perfume, Jack says it wonât as once he realised his mistake he put his aftershave on and that is what Vera canât smell and that is why he did not go to the bookies, Vera warns him if he gets up to his old tricks he will regret it giant offers to take the dresses to Frankieâs and Vera says to Jack that he is up to something but Jack says canât a man do some think nice for his wife and Vera says you canât and takes Jack dress to Frankieâs.

Karen is in the flat looking out the window when she hears the door go and says oh why have you been, I went to street cars looking for you, but when she turns round she see her aunt Eva and tells her that Steve should not have bought her here and that he had no right, but Steve says that he thought if he could not talk to her then maybe Eva could but Karen says to Steve how many times I feel fine and you have done this to make yourself feel better. Eva says the Karen that Steve as only done what he thinks is right but Karen says that she is not changing her mind and she is not going to see them, Eva says that is not why Steve as bought her here and she would not make her do something she would not do herself she tells Karen that Malcolm also came to see her and she also send him packing, Karen looks at Steve and says you thought it was just me but she pointed at Eva she knows the truth, Steve says So do I. Karen starts to cry but stops herself as she cried enough tears when she was a kid and is not wasting any more on them, Eva tells her that her mum is dead, Karen says I know I have known for 10 years.

Michaela Davis

This eveningâs episode starts with Steve finding Karen in the pub drowning her sorrows. He tries to get her to talk about her feelings towards her dead mother but she is having none of it. She says she doesnât feel anything and tells him to stop asking.

The bowling team are in the cafŽ thinking up a way to get Jackâs dress back from Frankieâs when in she walks. She comments on how worried Jack looks and they get talking. Jack finally manages to ask to come round and get ãVeraâsä dress back but Frankie says she already took the dress back round to his house!

Fiz offers Karen a cup of tea, then a cup of coffee, and then a biscuit but she tells her sheâs fine. Hayley asks Danny to give Karen a couple of days off and he agrees. Karen says sheâll bear it in mind and Danny says if thereâs anything she needs just ask. Sonia asks how her mum is and Karen bluntly says sheâs dead. She tells everyone that she died yesterday and asks for some more pink thread!

Les and Cilla are about to go on holiday. She gives Chesney some money and tells him that heâs staying at Fizzâs now instead. As she is still in work Les is reluctant to leave him on his own but Cilla persuades him and tells Chesney to go over to Fizzâs at about 5:30.

Hayley tells Karen sheâs sorry about her mum but Karen asks to change the subject. Rita comes and sits with them and asks about her mum which makes Karen storm off.

Dev is saying goodbye to Sunita as he is going to Bolton to ãlook in a shopä. Todd says he is probably going to buy her a ring.

Dev asks Frankie for Mayaâs address. He needs to talk to her and says Sunita doesnât know about it yet. She gives him the address then after heâs left she calls Maya.

BREAK

Chesney asks Candice where Fiz is but she says she wonât be in till very late. She tells him to go home and come back later.

Karenâs dad is at Steveâs door again asking about her. He tells Steve about the funeral for her mum and gives him an envelope. Steve asks to hear his side of the story that Karen told him but he wonât tell him.

Chesney is telling Sophie that heâs home alone and she suggests they have a party. Chesney says ok and they arrange to meet later.

Vera asks Jack about the dress. She thinks it belongs to his ãfancy womanä! He denies it and offers to take it to the charity shop. Vera says no ö she doesnât want people thinking she wore it ö so she cuts it up to make floor clothes and dusters!

Steve tells Karen her dad came round and when the funeral is. She says she wants nothing to do with it so Steve opens the envelope that her dad gave him. Inside is a picture that Karen drew when she was younger but she throws it in the bin and says that is where her past belongs.

Dev is at Mayaâs place giving her mail and asks her how sheâs getting on. Maya asks him what he wants and he tells her him and Sunita are getting engaged. Maya asks if that was all he wanted to do but he says he wants the ring back that he gave her.

Chesney and Sophie are watching TV at his place. She says they could run away together but not tonight ö sheâs got to have a bath!

Dev tries to make Maya understand that the ring was a family heirloom but she tells him to leave. Dev asks again about the ring but Maya says she has chucked it out. Eventually Dev leaves and the final shot is of Maya going to a draw and getting out the ring.

The End

Helen Edgar

Evening all.

Tonight's episode opens with a rather amusing moment which sees Jack putting a bra to his chest. Unfortunately, Tyrone walks in to see if Jack wants a pint and is shocked by what he sees! Jack swears him to silence and Tyrone says that he never thought Jack would turn out to be "one of those screws with a left hand thread" He asks if Vera knows and Jack tells him she doesn't and to keep his voice down, making Tyrone realise that Vera is upstairs. Jack tells him she's searching for her glasses. He leaves for the bowling green after telling Tyrone to keep Vera away from him. Jack leaves a dumbfounded Tyrone in his wake.

Chesney is spooning dog food into a dish for Schmichael and ponders whether he'd like it, as he's starving. He comes to the conclusion that it'd be unfair on Schmichael if he ate it.

Outside, Sonia (who's wearing an extremely ugly hat) and Deirdre are waiting for Liz by the Rovers. Deirdre and her elongated neck tell Liz to hurry up. Liz says she'll be out in a minute. Sonia and Deirdre walk up the Street, considering that they need a miracle to win in the bowls final. Chesney bounds out of his front door and asks if they have seen Fiz. Sonia tells Chesney that Fiz stayed at a friend's house and she's meeting them on the green. Deirdre says she'll be back tonight and Chesney says she'd better be before walking off. Tommy (carrying 8 cans of lager) greets him. Chesney says he smells burning. Tommy tells him heâs having a barbecue. Poor Chesney says he's never been to a proper one so Tommy invites him to his.

Eileen joins Deirdre and Sonia, who are standing by a minibus. Deirdre asks where Jackie is (referring to Jack's feminine alter ego) but Eileen reminds her that it's Ida so that he doesn't get sussed. She says that Hayley has taken him to a barn to get him sorted out.

Speaking of which, Hayley has just finished Jack's make up. When Jack asks how he looks Hayley replies by saying he looks like a woman who's had a very hard life. When he sees himself he comments that with a hairnet he could pass as Ena Sharples (lol!). He's less than impressed but Hayley assures him that that's the best she can do. Jack says he can't do it as he's a man, but when Hayley reminds him of his 200 quid bet with Ciaran, he has a change of heart. Jack hands Hayley Vera's glasses as Hayley decides to shave Jack's hairy legs and poor Jack grimaces in pain as she does so.

Dev's on the phone to Maya, who appears to be being difficult (just how we like her). Sunita comes in but Dev holds out his hand to silence her and agrees to meet Maya. Dev gives Sunita the old Bolton shop story and leaves, apparently to view the shop.

The bowling ladies are laughing and joking on the green but an exhausted Fiz isn't in the mood. Jack trots unconvincingly over as Ida. Edie (the opponents team leader) soon arrives to make some snide comments. She warns Hayley not to participate in the game but Hayley reminds her that there is no rule that stops her from being coach. At this point, Edie asks where Jack is and after insulting him, Jack almost confronts her. Edie is confident that her team will slaughter them in the game and waddles away. Jack tells the ladies they're going for a pint and to keep their eyes open for Vera.

Chesney gets a burger at the barbeque. When he's out of earshot, Angela asks Tommy why he invited him as she's worried Cilla could turn up. (but isn't Cilla on the barbeque?? sorry, couldn't resist) Rosie, meanwhile, is complaining to Craig, David and Sophie that she'll miss her friends. Craig says he'll still be her friend and has to prompt David to agree. Sally is criticizing the barbeque's food and when Kevin compares it to their back yard BBQs she retorts by saying they'll have a proper garden and house soon. Kevin asks where the money's coming from and she says it'll be from their work and brainpower. Kevin suggests they buy second hand uniform for Rosie but snotty Sally is aghast--only the best for Rosie!! Meanwhile, Chesney is happily tucking in to his burger.

At the bowling club's bar, Jack heads to the gents but the girls usher him towards the ladies. He refuses to go in. Vera and Tyrone enter and Jack hides his face. Vera asks where she is and Hayley tells her he's gone home as he was feeling under the weather. Jack edges away and Vera is sure she recognises Ida. Tyrone sees it's Jack but Fiz tells him to keep quiet.

BREAK

Dev's in Maya's house (or is it a flat??) and she brandishes the ring she said she threw away. She says he can have it if he sleeps with her but Dev refuses, saying he's got all the memories that he needs. Crafty Maya says it's her property and charges him 2000 pounds for it! That is unless he wants to take her to bed after all...

Tyrone approaches Jack and tells him that he can get help. Jack tells him to keep Vera away but it's too late. She appears! Meanwhile Edie is getting a bit undignified as Liz loses her round. Vera can be heard asking where Jack is and also that she recognises Ida. Hayley tells Jack it's his round against Edie and he edges subtly round Vera.

Dev returns home and Sunita asks if he'll buy the Bolton shop. He tells her he's been out to get something for her and places the ring first in her hands then on her finger. She's delighted, until realisation dawns on her. "How did you get it?" she demands!

Edie makes a good shot on the pitch. She suddenly realises that Ida is in fact Jack but he has just sussed that Edie is actually an Eddie! They agree to carry on as normal.

Sunita asks again how Dev got the ring and he admits that he's been to see Maya. Sunita is upset he lied but Dev says he didnât want to get her hopes up as he wasn't sure that Maya would agree to give back the ring. Sunita says she can't wear it and Dev tells her she's being over emotional. Sunita tells him she'll never wear it and if Dev thinks that's over emotional, he may as well leave!

Eddie makes another good shot and it looks like Jack's team will lose. Jack asks Hayley to undo his bra and, relaxed, he bowls a winning shot to the delight of his team--they've won the tournament!! Vera concludes she doesn't like Ida as she looks like the "the kind of trollop RJack would knock about with!" Classic!

Meanwhile, the electricity goes out on poor Chesney and, as Schmichael eats his own tail, Chesney worries about being home alone in the dark but assures his dog that it'll be all right.

The bowling team celebrate in the bar. Jack gets "another old bird to go with RVera!" when Hayley presents him with a trophy shaped like a bird. Jack prefers the thought of Ciaran's 200 quid however!! Vera and Tyrone arrive again and Jack makes a hasty exit. Vera is sure Ida ("Jack's fancy piece") will know where he is and vows to sort her out. As Jack heads for a shed, Vera is in close pursuit...

Meanwhile, Chesney calls round at Tommy's to ask for a fiver for the electricity meter. Tommy is sure Cilla or Les will have five pounds but Chesney tells him they're away on holiday. Angela says he can stay the night with them.

Vera is infuriated as Jack emerges from the shed in man form. she believes he's having an affair with Ida but when she looks in Ida is gone. Jack tells her she's imagining things and assures her that she'll never see Ida again. She's served her purpose! And that's it for tonight!

Duncan Lindsay

Hi everyone, here is the first of two really witty episodes, full of the amusing, well written dialogue which makes Corrie so very good.

We begin with Dev, sitting on Sunitaâs sofa, looking at Îthat ringâ. Sunita, clad in dressing gown, comes in and asks if heâs still playing with Mayaâs ring. He tells her his grandmother wore it for 46 years. Sunita asks if he really expected her to wear it, knowing that heâd given it to Maya, and that heâd gone round to see her to get it back. He tells her itâs important to him, because of what it means, the opal being the universe and the sapphire the earth, and how his grandfather gave it to his grandmother to symbolize their love. Sunita concedes that he can give it to her after they are married then, but she wanted her ring to be about them. He says that one day he will shower her with opals and sapphires, she tells him sheâll settle for a diamond.

Over at the Battersbyâs, Tommy has put the electricity on again, and he invites Chesney to have a kick around in their garden. Chesney declines, and says his mum will be back from Blackpool today, and Fizz will be back soon, too. Tommy asks if his mum does this a lot, and Chesney tells him sometimes, but he can look after himself, as long as he doesnât answer the door. Tommy remarks that he used to tell his kids not to answer the door, but he was only popping out for a newspaper or something.

Karen comes into the living room holding two dresses, and asks Steve which one she should wear, the red or the black. He tells her she canât wear red to a funeral, but she tells him sheâs not going to a funeral, sheâs going to Dev and Sunitaâs party. Steve says he doesnât know what to say, but he doesnât think they should go to the party. Karen storms out of the room, telling him that people die and get buried all the time, life goes on. She then comes back in to tell him, ÎIâll be wearing the red!â

Todd and Sunita are in the corner shop. He tells her he hasnât got her a present, but she says the main thing is, heâs coming. She tells him she hasnât invited Sarah or her family, and although he starts to say it wouldnât bother him if she had, he then falters and says, ÎWell, it would, but·.I have to live with it.â He assumes it will get better with time. Sunita tells him there was a time when he couldnât even talk about Sarah, but heâs moving on. Shelley comes in then, and asks for cocktail sausages. Sunita calls to Dev to ask if they have any, but he comes in from the back saying thereâs no call for them. He then tells them heâs going to whisk his beautiful fiancŽ away for a shopping trip ö a diamond!

Steve opens his front door to find Karenâs Auntie Eva standing there. She asks if Karen is in.

Hobbling along the street come Fizz and Kirk. Sheâs carrying her shoes and wearing some rather large red and orange flowers in her hair, and Kirk is holding his stomach. Fizz says she canât believe the taxi driver chucked them out of his car, but Kirk admits that he did make rather a mess, itâs the last time he does vodka slammers. Just then Tommy comes hurrying across the street towards them. ÎOi!â he calls, ÎIâve had your little brother kipping on my settee last night Îcos he was terrified of being left alone, and the Îleccy went off!â ÎChesney?â queries Fizz, looking puzzled. ÎLeft with no food and no money,â rages Tommy, and looking them up and down adds, Îwhile you two get up to all kinds of stuff.â Fizz asks what happened to her mum and Les, and is aghast to be told they went on holiday without Chesney. Tommy surmises that it must happen all the time as Chesney told him it was no big deal. He reminds them that anything could have happened, fire, perverts. Fizz and Kirk rush off to find the hapless Chesney.

The lad himself is in the back yard, and seems to be trying to attach a stick to Schmeikelâs tail. Fizz rushes into the yard, calling to Kirk that Chesney is there. Chesney tells her that he thought she was supposed to be looking after him, but she tells him she told Cilla she couldnât. Kirk comes into the yard, and tells Fizz that he feels sick again. (What does he expect her to do about it?) ÎAre you hungry?â Fizz asks, ÎI donât think I could hold anything down,â groans Kirk, ÎNot you, Chesney!â snaps Fizz as Kirk rushes indoors, with his hand clamped over his mouth. Chesney tells Fizz that Tommy made him bacon and eggs and gave him the money to get the electricity back on because it went off and he was scared. He had to ask someone, it was all right, wasnât it? Fizz tells him, ÎOf course it was,â but she looks worried.

Auntie Eva is trying to persuade Karen to go to the funeral, not to stay but just go to the service and sit at the back and not even go to the grave. Karen is adamant, sheâs not going. Her mother meant nothing to her when she was alive, sheâs not going to pretend she means something to her now.

In the Rovers, they are preparing for the engagement party. Ciaran is putting up a banner and Shelley and Betty discuss the food. Betty is a little disgruntled that this is the third time they have been Îpopping corksâ for Dev, but Shelley tells her that this time itâs different, this time itâs her best mate, so if Betty canât feel happy for Dev, could she just feel happy for Sunita.

Liz has a quiet word with Steve, asking if Eva has persuaded Karen to go to her motherâs funeral. Steve says he left them to it, but Liz tells him that Karen needs him. Steve tells her that Karen is blocking it out. He knows thereâs a lot she hasnât told him, but itâs like sheâs trying to pretend it didnât happen. Liz asks if he thinks she was abused. He tells her he knows her dad beat her, but doesnât know if there was any sexual abuse. He knows sheâs messed up mentally. ÎPoor Karen,â whispers Liz.

Back at the flat, Karen is still putting her case for not attending the funeral. How she had been Îdis-fellowshippedâ for smoking on a street corner, and her mother didnât stick up for her, just looked at her with contempt. Eva says she knows her mother was hard on her, she used to tell her to let Karen be. Karen remembers how she was told they would all go to hell and it would be her fault, and when they went knocking on doors, if they got those doors slammed in their faces, her mother would tell her it was Karenâs fault, because people could sense the badness in her. She then goes on to remember happier times, when she was little, and they used to do everything together. Karen wanted to be just like her. And she would make whatever cake she wanted for Karenâs birthday, but then she changed, and everything got serious, and there were rules and all sorts of things they couldnât do. She stopped making Karen cakes, they didnât celebrate her birthday. Karen lost her then. Eva tells Karen that when she and Steve were getting married she wrote to her mother to tell her, but she didnât send it, she realized she had no right, it was up to Karen to tell her. Eva realizes that Karen is not going to go with her. Karen agrees, she wonât forgive, Evaâs had a wasted journey.

In the corner shop, Eileen is making a life changing decision ö what to have for tea, fish fingers or sausages? Todd chooses the sausages, and then tells Eileen that heâs going to go to college and take his A levels. It doesnât mean heâs going to go to university, he just sees the need for some qualifications. Eileen is delighted of course, and is giving Todd a big kiss when Dev and Sunita come back. Sunita shows off her ring, telling them there were loads to choose from but this is the one she wanted, and it fits her Îperfickâ. (?)

Over in the pub, Ciaran points out that Shelley has been in a good mood for days, and he reckons itâs over Sunita. She tells him yes, because Sunita is her best mate. Ciaran says he doesnât remember her being in such a good mood when he was marrying Sunita. Shelley says that some people are made for each other and some people arenât ö like him an Sunita, and her and Peter. Ciaran tells her that she and Peter were meant for each other, and everybody could see that, except him.

Liz takes a plate of nibbles over to Steve who is sitting alone. She says that maybe Eva has persuaded Karen to go to the funeral, but Steve says he knows she wonât have gone. Liz wonders if it would help if Karen saw a bereavement counselor, the doctor could put her in touch with one. Steve says if she saw a doctor he would put her on antidepressants and she doesnât need pills, she needs to cry, to let it all out. He feels useless at all this, but he loves her.

Shelley opens the doors and in come Blanche and Deirdre, the first to arrive. Blanche is keen to get her hands on the free drinks, despite the fact that Dev and Sunita are not there yet. Shelley agrees to get the party started.

In the Kabin, Norris is dealing with a very irate young man with a rather camp voice, who has seen a flat advertised on their board but found it to be taken. Norris tells him they just put the cards up, they canât check on what flats have been taken and what prams have been sold. Todd comes in to buy something and the young man recognizes him. ÎIâm Sean, Karlâs friend,â he tells him, as Todd looks blankly at him. ÎOh yes,â says Todd, as the light dawns, Îfrom Canal Street.â The young man explains that heâs now homeless and has been sleeping on a friendâs floor but sheâs got cats, and the fur plays havoc with his tubes. Norris tells him thereâs a flat agency on Balaclava Terrace and theyâre not particular who they take.

Fizz is on Tommyâs doorstep, trying to give him five pounds for the electricity card and five pounds to cover any food he gave Chesney. Tommy retorts that he doesnât want paying for feeding a little lad that no one else cares about. Fizz asks if he really thinks she would have stayed out all night if sheâd known Chesney was all on his own. Tommy reckons that Chesney has dragged himself up. Fizz tells him, no, sheâs dragged him up, as well as dragging herself and their other brother up. (Presumably this is setting the scene for other brother to appear at some point?) Tommy says that Cilla shouldnât have kids, thereâs loads of people who want them and canât have them, and then thereâs trash like Fizzâs mother. Fizz agrees, but says she does what she can for Chesney. Fizz asks if Tommyâs going to report them to the Social Services. Tommy says he should do, but Fizz begs him, for Chesneyâs sake, not to. She promises it will never happen again. Tommy says it had better not.

Todd and Sean are crossing the road. Todd points out the house where he lives with his mother and brother. Sean says he thought Todd was getting married, but Todd tells him he came out and told her he was gay. ÎNo!â exclaims Sean, who then twitters, ÎI knew it, what did she say? Did she make a big scene··what ö you and Karl? Oops sorry, open mouth, say rubbish, think later!â Todd tells him that he lost everything, but found himself, and he and Karl did have something but itâs over now. Sean asks if heâs seeing anyone now, ÎNo,â Todd tells him, adding quickly, Îbut I donât·.â ÎOh donât worry, youâre not my type,â Sean says, ÎI go for dark builder types (Jason perhaps?) not boy next door.â Todd tells him that he thinks the flat over the bookies is still empty, and suggests he goes to the bookies to ask. As Sean departs, Todd calls to him and asks if heâs seen Karl. Sean hasnât, for a while, but offers to track him down for Todd. Todd tells him not to, it doesnât matter.

Just then Karen comes along, done up to the nines in the red dress and large, dangly earrings. She asks if Todd is going to the party, because sheâs in the mood for a good party. She says they must have a dance, perhaps to ÎYMCAâ and she says she wonât take no for an answer as she goes in through the pub doors. She goes up to Steve who is standing at the bar. He asks how it went with Eva, and she tells him they talked. ÎBut you still donât fancy it?â he asks. She tells him she fancies only three things, getting drunk, having a party and him.

Blanche is looking critically at the food and complaining to Deirdre that itâs not much of a spread. She supposes Dev is saving his money for his fourth and fifth engagement parties. Betty overhears, and outraged, comes over to tell them that Shelley has provided this as Sunitaâs best friend. Blanche remarks dryly that sheâs glad Shelley isnât her best friend. Deirdre wonders if her mother has any friends at all. Blanche asks when they can start eating, and Betty supposes that it will be when Dev and Sunita arrive.

Dev and Sunita are strolling down the street on their way to the Rovers. Sunita comments that she is too happy, she doesnât want to be this happy because something is bound to come along and spoil it. (I would think itâs an absolute certainty!) They stop for a quick kiss and there, watching from across the street, is the ex-girlfriend from hell, Maya.

The happy couple walk into the pub to a round of applause, and Blanche is relieved because now they can start eating. As Sunita shows off her ring to the assembled throng, Maya walks purposefully across the street, like someone on a mission.

And thatâs all for episode 1··.

Hello, and I'm sorry this second episode from Monday is so late, but I was busy writing Daran Little a nice thank-you note for writing it. Actually, that's a lie, I haven't had time to do that, either. But you will all want to write to thank him when you eventually get to see this episode.

We open in the pub where Sunita is showing off the ring and Dev is refusing to be thrown by Mike asking if he's actually going to marry this one. None of them notice Maya put her head around the door then go away.

In the street, that friend of Karl's is busy shouting into the bookies' office, claiming he could have someone for assault. Eileen and Todd come by and he comes over to talk to Todd, complaining that the bookie wanted 500 quid deposit. Eileen asks if he's a friend of Todd's and he admits he is -- and a friend of Dorothy's as well. That has to be explained to Eileen. [It's a slang phrase for being gay, before you ask] The Grimshaws invite him for a drink and as they walk towards the Rovers, Sean gets down to some serious questioning: "Do you exfoliate?" he asks Eileen. "You should exfoliate every day -- get rid of all that dead skin." Eileen is suddenly not amused by him. "What dead skin?!" Around the corner from them, we see Maya slip into Sunita's flat.

Back in the pub, Steve is having a go at Karen for knocking back two drinks too quickly. He wants her to talk about her mother but she refusing, saying she's not bothered. Todd and Eileen and Sean come in, the first two explaining that it's an engagement party. Eileen quickly starts telling people that Todd is going back to college to do his A-levels. Deirdre relays this information to Blanche, who is in one of her Bah! Humbug! moods. "College!" she snorts. "It'll be full of those homo sexuals!" I always thought homosexual was one word until I heard Blanche say it. When Deirdre corrects her and says they're call gays, she snorts again, saying it's another perfectly good word which has been hijacked. Blanche thinks Todd might change his attitude after two years in jail with hard labour. After all, that's what Oscar Wilde got. Deirdre questions whether her mother even knows what century it is, so Blanche quickly changes the subject, accusing Deidre of looking wistfully at Dev. Blanche regrets that Deidre chose Ken over all them shops. "You married foreign once. You could have done it again and got a shop out of it in the divorce settlement. Then you could have gone back to Ken with a bit of capital under your stocking top." Deirdre is aghast and tells Blanche that Dev didn't want her. "You've settled," Blanche says. "All your life you have settled for second best. You're a big disappointment to me, Deirdre." In another part of the Rovers, Sean is quite taken by Ciaran -- and his big, blue Irish eyes. Ciaran couldn't look less interested.

In Sunita's flat, Maya is searching. She seems particularly interested by the gas bill.

Back in the Rovers, Sean is accusing Shelley of misrepresentation because the Rovers doesn't do B&B. "So? Sue me." Liz is quizzing Betty on Dev's past. Liz suggests that because Sunita is ill, Dev plans to collect the insurance and buy another shop. Eileen is asking Todd if he fancies Sean. "Do you fancy every man you see?" Todd asks. "Fred? Norris?" "Point taken," Eileen admits. Steve is talking to Karen again. If there is an orchestra searching for its triangles, they're hanging from Karen's earlobes. Blanche tells Emily the food isn't up to much. Emily takes one look at Blanche's packed plate and suggests she seems to be enjoying the food. "I'm forcing myself," says Blanche, "out of politeness." She points out that it's also sparking wine being served, not champagne, and says she'll lay £20 that in a year's time Dev will be engaged to someone else. But when the man himself appears suddenly, Blanche tells him how much they are enjoying it and wishes him all the best. Sunita tells Dev she's going home because she's forgotten to take her medication.

In the flat we see Maya looking at the medication.

Down in the street, Les and Cilla are back, with Cilla insisting she'd like a drink before she goes home.

And as Sunita puts her key in the lock, we go for a . . .

{break}

In the flat, Maya hides, knocking over a figurine, then taking it above her head and waiting to smash it down on Sunita, who is taking her pills. As Sunita leaves, Maya lets out a secret sigh.

In the Rovers, Sean is lecturing the ladies on skincare. Emily goes to talk to Karen and to offer some sympathy, but Karen is very rude to her. She tells Steve she just wants to get on with her own life. "Not my Mum's, not my Dad's, my life." Sunita comes back and tells Dev she can't stop thinking about Maya. Eileen asks Todd if he minds if Sean kips on the sofa. Sean is being told about a local B&B and when he empties his pockets in the search for something to write with or on, a harmonica appears. And we discover than Deidre can play! She starts playing and for some reason this sends Karen almost over the edge. She stands up and starts making a speech about Dev and Sunita. Unfortunately, it is quite rambling and not very complimentary. She has just started on how not to bring up children when Steve manages to shut her up by proposing a toast. Cilla and Les come in and Tommy immediately tells her what he thinks of her, bringing the whole put to a halt. "What are you all staring at?" Cilla screams at the crowd. "It's not my fault! I'm allowed to have a life, aren't I?" Sean is transfixed. "Is it like this all the time? This is better than Big Brother. You should charge for admission!"

Back in the flat, Maya has found Sunita's birth certificate. She calls someone on the phone (Willy?) and tells him to pick her up.

In the Battersby household, hurricane Cilla strikes with a force that could strip pine trees. She screams at Fizz for leaving Chesney alone, but Chesney himself is just upset by their fighting.

In the street, Maya gets into a car driven by a man we don't know. It is clear he thinks her name is Sunita.

Back in the Rovers, Liz is telling Steve to take Karen home. Mike asks Deidre if she is jealous of Dev, but she denies she wants to get married. He thinks he would have been a good husband to her, but Deidre says she's chosen the better man. Eileen offers Sean the sofa for a few nights and he wells up at the thought someone would be so kind. Jason comes in and Sean looks as if he might be interested. Blanche approaches Deidre. She wants to apologise because of something Emily has said about Karen's family. "You've been a good daughter." She asks Deidre to give them all another tune. "You've always said I was rubbish," Deidre says. Blanche says maybe the practice will help improve her. So Deidre starts playing Amazing Grace, the only other tune she knows. This seems to stir something in Karen, who has just told Steve she doesn't need his help. She starts to weep and talk to herself at the bar -- "You're wicked, Karen Phillips. Nobody loves you."

The end.

Margaret Carr

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Updates written by K Richard Whitbread, Martin Rosen, Ann Logan, Helen Edgar, Michaela Davis, Margaret Carr, Mary Earlam, Amanda Souter.

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