1 August 2000

It's been a week tinged with sadness on the Street this week; he's gone. He packed up his worldly goods in a bag, slung it on his back, said his goodbyes to the ladies who matter and he went, just like that. Ta-ra Spider chuck. So anyway, a bit sadder than usual but without any further ado, here we go with this week's Coronation Street update.

Working at the Benefit Agency becomes too much for Spider when he has to refuse a single mother her benefits and he walks out. Now, this could have been a good scene. Nay, it could have been a great scene. The potential was there - he could have railed against Daily Mail readers, he could have stood on his desk and lectured his civil service colleagues about ethics and morals and I suppose he did, a bit, but only in the most wimpy kind of way. If ever we were in any doubt that Spider had changed, dumbed down, from the free thinking, free-range eating, free-loving hippy we'd come to know and love, this was proof beyond a doubt that he was now part of the establishment, with the only thing he was ever likely to revolutionise being the staff rota. He couldn't even rebel properly. But he did, in his own way, sort of. He headed home to sit around a candle and went 'um' in an unconvincing Buddhist way and tells Toyah he's booked them both on a spiritual journey. "We're not going to the Millennium Dome, are we?" she asks. No, Toyah, you're going to India. Well, Spider would have liked you to have gone to India with him, he'd bought two tickets after all, but it's too much for Toyah to take in, too sudden. She can't just up and leave, can she? In the end, finally, and tearfully she decided her own destiny, remaining in Weatherfield without him. And so he went, just like that. He said goodbye to Aunty Em (more tears), paid a month's rent in advance and left £100 in the bank for Toyah. And then he went. And then I cried.

Mike and Linda's wedding plans start to take shape with invitations the size of posh Christmas cards. Mike's a little confused though, he wants to know why Linda isn't inviting any of her own family. She puts him straight, telling him she doesn't want anything to do with them and then she closed the subject, pronto.

After spending the night on Rita's sofa, Norris surprises her with a bunch of flowers the next morning as a thankyou, telling her that sleeping on her sofa was better than being at the B&B while Monica was weaning her pups: "It's like 101 Dalmatians down there". Rita isn't keen when Norris suggests staying on there longer, or in the flat above, but she knows someone she can offload him to - Emily! Perfect! He moves in and starts to irritate her, calling her "Mrs. B." wonderful stuff. While Emily searches through some jumble destined for a charity shop, Norris finds an old train set and offers to take it off her hands. Emily accepts his money in order to get him off her hands.

Over at the Battersby's, Jim takes a look at the motorbike that Les and Dennis have salvaged, and with his mechanical knowledge, pronounces it a bit of a good 'un. The 1950's Harley Black Shadow (or should that be a 1952 Vincent Black Lightning?) looks set to be a little earner for them, just as long as they get it tidied up, sold and out of the house before Janice returns, that is. Dennis is settling in there quite well though, it'd be a shame to throw him out when Janice gets back, especially as he's been cooking toad in the hole with mushy peas and gravy. And really, when you get a bloke who can cook a decent toad in the hole (veggie sausages, of course), it's probably a good idea to hang on to him.

Ken's book goes on sale at £7.50. It includes a dedication inside to Deirdre and he has his first sale in the Kabin although Norris proclaims: "It's not quite Harry Potter". Edna from the factory says she can't afford to buy it although expresses interest in the chapter about Weatherfield sweatshops. Ken goes on article alert when Edna spills the beans about sweatshops not having changed much over the years, especially ones run by small, greedy, capitalist, barrow-boy adulterers.

Gary's looking forward to Paula's visit this coming weekend although he confides in Vera that he's feeling a bit nervous about it. Where will everybody sleep?

After she expressed an interest in genealogy, Ken points Rita in the direction of a specialist bookshop and off she goes. And as if by magic, the shopkeeper appeared. Anthony Stephens. Romance alert. Romance alert.

Steve starts getting worried after a brick is thrown through the cab office window just a week before he's due to give evidence at Jez's trial. He gets further worried after a dodgy fare ride to the middle of nowhere and then a nasty man in his car threatens him to keep away from the trial, or else. I think someone is trying to tell him something here, but what could it be? Anyway, he drowns his sorrows in the Rovers and impresses on Leanne and Vikram the gravity of the situation: "It's not an 'aircut, it's a flipping murder trial". In fact, he's so scared, there's no way he can give evidence now.

Over at the Platt's happy nest, little David is feeling left out of things and he lets them all know how unhappy he's been feeling since "that stupid babeh" was born. Quite right too! To make him feel a bit better, Sarah-Lou asks him to be godfather at the christening later this week, but he'd much prefer a new computer game. When Sarah-Lou asks her if she'd like to be godmother, Hayley dissolves in tears.

Curly asks Emma if she'd like to move in with him, but she doesn't reply - she's asleep at the time. Curly doesn't half pick his moments, doesn't he? There's a lovely scene where Curly tells her how he feels about her, the camera pans to his face and you believe every word he's saying... and then the camera pans to Emma - snoring on the sofa. But that doesn't deter him, and he asks her again, this time when she's awake. He still doesn't get an answer from her, she's rushing out to work this time. but she promises him she'll think about it. Awww.

And that's just about that for this week.

Glenda :-)


8 August 2000

Greetings from the heart of the Big Brother household! Yes, this week, the update comes direct to you from a secret location where I've had no contact with the outside world for the last, er, twenty minutes or so. I have not spoken to, or seen, another human being in that time, and my every move has been relayed to the world's media through special cameras hidden in my knitting bag. Keep tuned readers and you can Watch! me drinking a glass of wine. Thrill! to me typing at the PC and be completely Bored Witless! by the fact that for the next 40 minutes, I'll be sitting here, without any further ado, typing this week's Coronation Street update. And here we go...

Norris sets up his train set on Emily's kitchen table and he's going 'woo woo, choo choo' and all that stuff as Emily rolls her eyeballs to the ceiling, thinking it's all innocent fun. But when she almost steps onto the box that the train set belongs to, Norris chucks a mental, asking her if she knows the true value of such a thing! Aha! His secret is out. Emily demands to know the true worth of the train set and Norris, shamefacedly, has to admit it's worth £160, not the £7.50 he paid for it. As if that's not enough for Norris to admit to, Emily shames him in the Rovers in front of Alma and Vera, to which he has no choice but to admit: "My name is Norris Cole and I defrauded the Weatherfield General Hospital League of Friends". Emily charges him £10 interest, demands payment in full and makes Norris promise to play with his choo choo in his room in future. A wonderful scene.

Emma tells Curly that she's decided to move in with him, and surprises him at breakfast with champagne, croissants, cereal and kisses. Curly's over the moon and Les Battersby is quite happy too, assuming that having a lady copper living next door will give him a friend in the force. Some hope.

Martin tries to talk to young David about being left out of things since the baby was born, but it's not doing much good so he buys 'Voodoo Blood Battle IV' to cheer the lad up instead. Anyway, they all go off to the christening of baby Bethany Brittany Platt (BBBP for short), only David decides to make a ten year old of himself, yelling "I hate you all" before doing a runner, only to be brought home much, much later, by Emma in a cop car after she'd caught him shoplifting in town. Candice turns up for the christening to be god-mother alongside Hayley, but when Candice's mum finds out where she's at, she storms into the Platt household and drags her daughter away from BBBP's party. Also at the christening, with young David gone AWOL, it falls on Roy to take the role of The Godfather after Gail makes him an offer he can't refuse.

On work placement at the local radio station, Toyah gets permission to interview Ken about his new book, which she thinks will make an interesting piece for the show. She does all the work but her boss won't let her play it, so she sticks it on in place of a recipe slot while the boss is out of the office somewhere, probably on a fag break. He's furious when he finds out and promptly sacks her. Meanwhile, Linda and Mike (but especially Linda) are convinced that Deirdre was the one who spilled the beans to Ken for his article on local sweatshops. Nothing Deirdre can say will change their minds and when Linda starts locking up the filing cabinet so Deirdre can't get to documents she needs to work on, it's too much and Deirdre storms out. Lurching across the road, she storms straight into the Rovers and gives Ken a piece of her mind, but a sly smile plays around Ken's lips when Deirdre tells him she's walked out on Mike at the factory.

Paula comes all the way from Blackpool ("We've been on this bus now for 6 days and 3 hours without a toilet break, by 'eck as like and that M61 is rough on the bum when you're on a coach seat and you don't know the words to 'Charlie had a pigeon' ") to spend the weekend with Gary and the twins. Gary has a fare to collect so he lets Paula and Walter (I know he's called Warren but I like Walter better) into the house and says he'll not be long. Anyway, the woman he's gone to collect is involved in a domestic dispute so he has to ferry the woman here, there and everywhere and before you know it, half a day has gone by, the fare owes him nearly £50 and her thieving, no good for nothing ex-bloke has gone and emptied her bank account so she can't pay Gary. And to top it all off, she's got nowhere to go. Gary, desperate to get back to Paula, runs the woman to the B&B where Jack and Vera kindly take her in (eventually) and Gary even more kindly offers to pay the Duckworths for the woman's stay there as well as having to work extra hours to make up the lost fare. What a diamond geezer that Gary is, eh?

And as if by magic, the shopkeeper appeared. Again. This week he gave Rita a huge red wig and an oversized green coat and sent her off to entertain the children in the circus. Anyway, Rita and Antony meet up at Roy's Rolls when Roy hosted a cultural evening with a reading by Mr. Kenneth Barlow, esquire, local author of a local book, sold for £7.50 in the local shop. Anyway, Antony asks Cleopatra to join him at the theatre this week, he's always given two tickets for these things, being a reviewer, and off she goes, all sixes and sevens, dolled up to the nines. Norris sounds the warning bell to her in the Kabin: "Just watch what you're doing with the book seller, Rita dear, you can't trust a man who lives his life surrounded by works of fiction". Although Rita insists that Antony is just a friend, she is more than a little disturbed by his admission over dinner that he's still married! Married! The downright cad! "Listen", he tells her "It's not what you think....", but Rita's heard this before, too many times, to stay and listen to what Antony has to tell her. Actually, it's something she probably hasn't heard before - but before he can explain any more than: "My wife, you see, she's ill.... ", it's too late. Rita has left the building.

There's also been lots of nail chewing and finger biting this week with Steve McDonald getting ready (or not) to give evidence at the trial of Gerald Francis Quigley (Jez, for short). Natalie's in pieces, she's not going to have an easy time of all of this and on day one of the trail things ain't going too well when Steve's given a grilling by a woman in a scary wig.

And that's just about that for this week. Tune into Big Brother next week to see if I've voted myself out of the household. Over and out, Roger.

Glenda ;-) Oh go on, have a look at it: http://zen.sunderland.ac.uk/~aa8gyo/index.html


15 August 2000

Greetings from the heart of an English summer. It's too hot to sleep, too hot to work and too hot to type without getting your fingers stuck on the keyboard. It looks like the heat has also caused some problems with getting last week's update out but bear with it, it'll be with you soon, I'm sure. Peter Flint has done a sterling, voluntary, job in setting up and maintaining the mailing list (he's 83 you know and still has all his own teeth) and I'm sure that he'll soon get to grips unplugging the blockage that has become known as the Coronation Street weekly update. [I'm not 83! But do have my own teeth and hair. Oh, and I'm single]

So without any further ado, here we go again, aided and abetted by 14 pints of Timothy Taylor's Landlord and some wildlife programme on the telly. Hang on, it's just been changed to the evening session on Radio 1. Oh crikey, hang on, it's changed again, it's Paul Oakenfold now. Anyway.

Norris decides to take a protective interest in Rita's affairs, especially the one he thinks she shouldn't be having with a married man. But she isn't having anything with anyone, married or not, as she tells Emily in the Rovers, away from the prying eyes and wagging ears of Mr Cole in the Kabin. Anthony sends Rita a huge bouquet of flowers by way of apology and Rita decides she's going to give him the chance to explain himself. And as if by magic, the shopkeeper appeared. (Bear with me, I've always been a Mr Benn fan and that line has just been too good to resist. I'll stop doing it soon, promise). He tells Rita the truth about his wife. Yes, he's still married. No, he no longer has a relationship with his wife. And no, they don't even live together any more. In one of the most intriguing storylines I can recall, and certainly one that poses a moral dilemma, he tells Rita that his wife Isabel suffers from an advanced state of Alzheimer's and lives in a nursing home. The disease affects her so badly that she no longer recognises her own husband. But does this make his feelings for Rita acceptable? Rita thinks not at first and confides in Emily that she doesn't really know what to make of it all. Finally, she agrees to another night at the theatre, a platonic friendship and nothing more, with Antony.

Dole-wallah Deirdre gets herself down to the Jobcentre but there's nothing worth applying for (there never is Deirdre, get yourself registered with a couple of agencies in London girl, they'll be falling over themselves to offer you wadges of cash to temp in offices to sit and surf the net in between the filing and the typing. Excuse me, I digress, but I'm having a great summer nonetheless). Just as Deirdre's searching for work, Maya blu-tacks a sign in the corner shop window saying 'Help wanted, apply inside'. Mmm... these two events could be connected during next week's update methinks. Quite naturally, Deirdre's not best pleased with Ken, blaming him for her losing her job, especially as he manages to get another woman into work this week. Sort of. He accompanies Toyah to the radio station where she was on work placement before getting sacked last week, and she manages to talk to the organ grinder instead of the monkey, who tells her how much he liked the interview she did with Ken and is looking forward to hearing more of her work. But anyway, back to Ken and Deirdre. The pair of them have a chat and Ken admits he was never happy about her working for the one person he despises. It's quite a touching scene, made better for the fact that they're arguing like billy-oh while Blanche is in the house. Blanche goes out, Ken and Deirdre make up and when the old dragon returns, all is sweetness and light and she's very confused.

The big storyline of the week has been Jez's court case - close your eyes now if you don't know what happens. He gets acquitted. He goes free. The jury says he's an innocent man. Right, you can open them again now. While the circumstantial and forensic evidence can't be doubted, the case isn't strong enough to convict Jez of murder. Everyone's in shock - Natalie and Steve more than anyone of course. Natalie's determined to see justice done and Steve's plain scared that he'll be next on Jez's hit list. When Jez turns up in the Rovers with a couple of henchmen at his side, Natalie tells him to get out, as you'd expect. And as you'd also expect, from Jez, he lets her know he isn't scared of her, or Jim McDonald who tries to put the frighteners on him. Jim's a bit worried for Steve's sake, so he takes the lad a sledgehammer, just in case, to keep beside him in the cab office. And then Jezzy boy pays Steve a visit there, but the sledgehammer's out of reach when it's needed. Jez tells Steve he wants his eight grand back, he tells him he'll be around, he tells him he was the one who murdered Tony Horrocks. And then before he walks out, he makes that creepy 'zzst' noise between his teeth, grips and twists Steve's nose between his fingers. (I do that to my brother sometimes, grip and twist his nose then hold my thumb up going: "I've got your nose, I've got your nose". He gives me one of his looks and goes: "Glenda, stop it. You're almost 36 years old. It's not funny any more". Oh yes, it is, it is.)

There's a surprise visitor at the B&B when Geoff Horton turns up with little Tommy. Doreen's done a runner with her fancy man, a younger bloke she's been having an affair with, so Vera's only too happy to look after Tommy temporarily until things are sorted out in Blackpool. When Doreen turns up asking to take Tommy away with her, Vera gives her short shrift, assisted by Jack, who throws the woman out. Tommy's staying with his gran and grandad Duckworth, for now, anyway.

Fred invites Ashley and Maxine to dinner at the golf club and against Maxine's wishes, the pair of them go there for the evening. Fred has an ulterior motive for the dinner; he wants Ashley to join the golf club as a member and even lines up Mike Baldwin to second his membership. But despite hobnobbing with Weatherfield's finest - footballers, models and the likes of 'Fishfinger' Fawcett and his missus, Ashley quite simply doesn't want to play golf. Maxine can't afford to let this social climbing opportunity pass by, so she offers to join as a lady golfer instead.

And elsewhere on the Street; Dennis offers Jim 20% percentage on all takings if he rents out space in the garage to him to fix motorcycles. Les and Dennnis hatch a scam to cash in on returning supermarket trolleys to Freshco and that's just about it for this week.

Glenda ;-)


22 August 2000

It's been an exciting week, what with Sunderland winning our first game of the season, arranging to go on holiday next weekend (I'll be in New York and San Francisco if anyone wants to meet up for a drink and a Corrie chat) and most exciting of all, it's my birthday tomorrow. 21 again? No, I'll be thirtysomething going on 17 and I never want it to change. While I'm on holiday, I've got a super duper stand-in update writer who I know will do an excellent job but I'll reveal all next week before I go. Anyway, without any further ado and with the help of fizzy pop and biscuits (perfect birthday fare) here we go with this week's Coronation Street update.

Janice returns from her mother's, curious that the Battersby household is unusually clean and tidy. She knows Les would never have done it so it can only mean one thing, he's had a woman in there while she's been away. Les tries to explain that Dennis has been staying but she won't listen and storms off, furious. Anyway, when Janice calms down she realises that having Dennis around the place might have its advantages (he cooks a mean black pudding) and she agrees to him staying on as lodger as long as he obeys some basic ground rules and pays rent - to her, not Les. Les and Dennis start scheming to rescue shopping trolleys from Freshco, planning to sell them back to Curly, claiming they found them in the canal. I lost interest in this storyline a bit but needless to say, it backfired on them and they ended up with a backyard full of trollies they can't shift.

Emma moved in with Curly this week, leaving Curly pondering where they could position Emma's exercise bike. She wonders why they can't just stick it in the attic, but as that's where Curly keeps his pride and joy, the telescope, he isn't keen on having his space invaded, although if the bike did share space with his astronomical extension, it would mean he could keep a closer eye on Uranus.

Deirdre started work this week in the corner shop after the divine Dev offered her a job. "The Gods have directed you here" he drawls. "No they haven't, it was me mother, we're out of cornflakes" she replies. Anyway, she starts work there and cuts Linda down to size when she comes in to gloat. She also has to cut short Blanche who comes in with a good luck card and vitriol, letting Deirdre know in no uncertain terms that this pithy shop job is beneath her daughter's capabilities.

Leanne gets a postcard from Mark on his travels. Then she gets a bouquet of flowers, then a diamond and gold necklace, then a massive delivery of all sorts of flowers arrives for her, all from an anonymous admirer. With the bouquets in the Rovers, that back room has not smelt so fragrant since Annie Walker was in there sprinkling Estee Lauder on her pulse points. But when she finds out just who these gifts are from, the evil Jez no less, she isn't best pleased. She's even more unhappy when a couple of his henchmen grab her off the street and kidnap her, dragging her kicking and screaming back to his flat. He tells her he's a changed man, he's off drugs and wants to make a fresh start with her. Then he smashes her head off the door and threatens her before screaming at her to get out, which seemed to me to be the wrong sort of message to be giving to someone you like. Anyway, Leanne starts wondering what life would be like away from Jez right now, a new life, perhaps on the other side of the world - with Mark.

Doreen Horton brings her feckless fancy man, Carl, to the B&B to pick up little Tommy but Vera's not having it, and hurries Tommy out with Tyrone before Doreen can see that he's in there. Anyway, Doreen reckons she should have Tommy as s'hes his legal guardian but Vera points out that she is only one of two legal guardians and without her husband Geoff agreeing to Tommy being handed over, she's not going to let him go. But who's going to look after him while Jack and Vera are working? Vera drops Tommy off at the Platts house and young David takes him under his wing, forcing him into stealing sweeties from the corner shop (he doesn't though, he pays for them and only pretends he's stolen them).

Rita and the shopkeeper spend more time together this week as he takes her out on day trips in his jam-jar in her search for her ancestors. When she invites Anthony back to her flat for a coffee (come on Rita, you've been around a bit, you should have known), she's rather surprised when he puts his arm around her shoulder (no mean feat with those shoulder pads) and moves in closer. She's so surprised in fact, that she asks him to leave and they wish each other a very cordial goodnight.

Toyah's upset over her poor A level results - she's got three E grades. Ken tries to cheer her up a bit, saying an E isn't a fail, it's still a result of sorts and this sort of works, with Janice and Les doing their best to be proud of their daughter.

Tyrone is finding it hard to part with Monica's pups but Jack and Maria remind him of the reason he's doing all of this - his new car, a set of wheels, snogging on the back seat, freedom. He tells Maria he also wants to buy an engagement ring. He interviews prospective parents for the pups but decides none of them are good enough for his babies, bless him. Jack has to step in and make him see sense. Tyrone presented Jack and Vera with a framed photograph of himself and Monica for the Duckies 43rd wedding anniversary this week. Jack, of course, had forgotten all about it.

Linda, with no friends of her own, asks the local barmaid, Geena to be best woman at her wedding. Geena, who needed a new frock anyway, says yes. Mike invites Deirdre to the wedding, but I don't think Linda knows about this yet as she hasn't thrown a wobbly.

Anyway, thats just about that for this week. I'm off to have my birthday.

Glenda ;-)


29 August 2000

Firstly, I'd just like to say - thank you - for all the birthday greetings and e-cards received last week, much appreciated. Secondly, I'd like to introduce your guest updater for the next three weeks as I travel to America for my coast to coast holiday. He's someone who I don't know a lot about, he's a bit of a mystery this bloke. What I do know is that his posts to the Corrie newsgroup over the past few months have had me chortling - his sense of humour is creative and wicked. Ladies and gentleman, John Laird of Oxford, England, will be your guest updater for the next three weeks. (If you like his style, write and tell him so, he's not done this before so be gentle with him). Thirdly, without any further ado (and I'll see you in three weeks time) here we go with this week's Coronation Street update.

Matrimonial musings carry on this week as Linda and Mike's big day draws near and they pop into the Kabin for traveller's cheques for the Maldives honeymoon. The factory girls can't believe Linda's wedding list - it's all Austrian crystal champagne glasses and fancy stuff costing more than their week's wages. Janice reckons if they don't buy something from the list, they'll not be invited to the wedding, so she tries to find something she can buy from the Argos catalogue.

Leanne left this week after being scared witless by Jez. She pawned the necklace that Jez had sent her in order to buy her air ticket and went off to the airport in Steve's taxi to join Mark in Amsterdam. Will I miss her? Probably not. And why does everyone have to leave Weatherfield in a taxi when there's a perfectly serviceable bus stop in the Street? Hasn't anyone ever just walked away? Anyway, Leanne's departure leaves a barmaid vacancy in the Rovers, and Toyah needs the money as she's been accepted to Weatherfield Uni (eh?) to study Journalism (they let anyone on Journalism courses these days, shocking innit?). Natalie's unsure but takes Toyah on trial to see how she does, and has some misgivings when she finds Toyah telling Fred Elliot she's not a piece of meat to be leered at. Sorry, Toyah, but if you're going to be a barmaid then that's exactly what you are. After Natalie has a quiet word with her new barmaid - either put up with it or get out - Toyah puts on a smile and a wiggle and serves up beer to the Weatherfield men. Spider would die if he knew.

There's a beautiful scene this week between Fred and Rita when she confides to him, in tears, her feelings for the married shopkeeper. It's a classic bit of Corrie that brought tears to my eyes, with the pair of them talking about how getting older doesn't mean losing out - on anything. Anyway, Anthony takes Rita out to the theatre again, as friends, and en-route he has to call into the residential home to drop off his wife's glasses. Rita sees Anthony with his wife and things seem to become clearer for her. She admires him more somehow, but still wants to keep the relationship platonic and admits to Emily she wishes they were part of a wider social circle. To do her bit in helping out her friend, Emily invites the pair of them for dinner on Wednesday with Norris. I'm sure it'll be thrilling.

Young David Platt has been a bit of a star this week, leading little Tommy astray with what we used to call as a kid "knocky nine doors" where you knocked on someone's front door and did a runner. I don't know why we called it "nine doors" though as we'd usually get caught after the first one, all the parents would be alerted, we'd be boxed round the lugs and sent to bed without cake. Anyway, Tyrone's supposed to be looking after Tommy but Doreen and her feckless fancy man Carl, snatch him while no-one's looking and take him back to Blackpool. Vera's distraught and Tyrone's troubled and sets off with Maria to get the lad back, which, surprisingly, he does, leaving a note for Doreen on top of her telly. Vera's overjoyed at having her grandson back but Jack's got his face on.

But back to David, and he's been pestering his parents for a dog which he reckons can't be as unhygienic, smelly or time consuming as a baby (they are, and you have to walk them through sleet at 7am). Gail and Martin agree to David having one of Monica's pups but soon change their mind after finding out Tyrone's charging £400 for the pedigree pups.

Fred finds out there's a supermarket development planned near his shop so with a lot of hesitation, negotiation and finally resignation, he agrees to taking one of Duggie Ferguson's units on Victoria Street on a two year lease. The pair of them shake on the deal. Well, Duggie shook and Fred wobbled.

Now that the Victoria Street development has finished, all the lads pile into the Rovers to celebrate. Arm wrestling breaks out over the beer with Duggie and Vinnie giving it what for - it's anyone's game and both men put their backs into it (as it were). Fists start flying after Duggie mutters to Vinny that the winner "gets a crack at the other man's sister". Natalie sorts them out though, good lass. Geena and Dennis also have an arm wrestle and Geena wins hands down (as it were, again) after she flatters and flutters her eyelids at him. Vinny and Duggie then get roaring drunk after a whisky drinking competition and fall asleep together in the Rovers after Duggie signs a beer mat stating he'll give Vinny a job. Of course, the next day, he's forgotten all about it but comes up with a job, of sorts, for me-laddo. Vinny now acts as agent for Duggie, doing all the crap jobs that Duggie doesn't want to do, the sort of jobs that capitalist landlords never want to do - you know, things like listening to their tenants and sorting out problems with their accommodation.

Now that the lovely Spider has left, I am pleased to announce an official transfer of my crush from Mr Nugent to Delicious Dev. This week, DD wants someone to sort out things in the back room for him, bills and paperwork, that sort of thing, and Deirdre is just the woman to do it. He now feels organised and is so impressed that he offers her promotion and a pay rise. He tells her: "You've made me feel like I am in charge of my own life". Ah yes, Dev, that's what women do for blokes, we keep it subtle but we know, we know who's really in charge.

A man after my own heart, Roy waxes lyrical about an allotment to grow organic vegetables for use in the cafe. Hayley says she'll think about it and wonders who they'll hand the cafe to once they're gone, family like. Neither of them look comfortable discussing such things and Hayley looks away, sipping on her orange juice.

And that's just about that for this week. A million thanks to John Dean for looking after things while I'm away. See you all in three weeks time.

Glenda :-)


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