Greetings and welcome to another weekly update coming
at you like a rolling ball of Easter Egg decorated with a pink stripy ribbon,
and of course, a perky bonnet. And so, without any further ado, here
we go with this week's Coronation Street update.
If you'd like your weekly update with pictures and fun Corrie stuff, have
a look at :
http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com
In all the years I've been writing the weekly update, this week has
had the biggest story of the lot. I don't think it was the best and certainly
wasn't my favourite, but in media hype terms, they don't come much bigger
than this. Yes, t'was the week when Mike Baldwin died in the arms
of Ken on the cobbles. After he'd been wandering around Weatherfield
in his jim-jams and the rain he catches his death of cold, quite literally,
with a heart attack brought on by pneumonia. I was expecting
to be moved by Baldwin dying and I was all set for the end of one of soap's
great characters with a bottle of wine, box of tissues to soak up the tears
and there I was, holding the hand of my favourite person as we watched from
our sofa Baldwin croak on the cobbles. But I didn't feel anything and now
I'm confused. Am I turning into the hard-hearted harlot I feared I always
would? Or is it because it was Baldwin and not say, Betty or Rita, for whose
soap send-offs I know I will be in bits?. Anyway, the grapevine
of the Street drops bits of gossip and news so that one by one, the residents
all find out that Mike has gone to the great knicker-stitcher in the sky.
Deirdre was in tears in the backyard with a fag in her hand while sensitive
Jamie blames Danny for Mike's death. Danny wants the reading of the will
brought forward before the funeral but little does he know that Leanne's
found another version of the will in the flat. And the one that Leanne's
found leaves everything to Adam, not Danny. Janice returned this week
and advises Leanne to keep quiet about this second will in the hope that
Danny will inherit the flat, the Spanish villa, the way of life that Mike
once had and that strumpet Leanne thinks she now deserves. Adam also
returned from Scotland with a tan and a mad haircut that makes him look like
a young Incredible Hulk.
Away from the hype, elsewhere on the street Norris decides to place
a lonely hearts ad in the paper and try to find lurve. He even persuades
Rita to get a computer for the Kabin so he can log on in the hopes of uploading
his profile. When Rita finds out what he's been using the computer
for, she decides to have a bit of fun and responds to his lonely hearts ad
under a pseudonym, suggesting they meet for dinner at The Clock. She has
to have help from Ken to work the PC, but soon gets the hang of it and turns
into not so much a Silver Surfer, more of a Big-red Boogie Boarder. Well,
Norris is done up all dapper but Rita's stitched him up like a kipper and
he's not best pleased when he finds out it's Rita that's been emailing
him. The two of them stay and have dinner together and Norris confides
that he's lonely and wants a companion. Rita tells the Kabin cutie that
she'll stop poking fun and help him seek out a special lady to take his
mind off stationery and stamps.
Vernon's new singer Michelle is causing some ruffles for Liz 'pimp my
clothes' McDonald. "Those legs have got ambition" she sniffs at Bev
over the bar at the Rovers as she eyes up Michelle chatting to her Vern.
When Liz finds out that Vern and Michelle have been dropped off a flat
together by one of the Streetcabs, she assumes the worst and goes round
there to see just what's going on. What she finds is Vernon looking at a
flat that Michelle's estate agent brother had recommended for Vernon - and
Liz. "Would you do me the great honour…" proposes Vernon to a startled
Liz. "Of becoming my flat-mate?" "I will" she replied and they would
have lived happily every after but Liz tells him she doesn't actually like
the flat and so they start hunting for one of their own together. Bev
isn't amused and tells Liz what she thinks of Vernon, in a roundabout, kind
of subtle, not in so many words, sort of a way, as only a seasoned old barmaid
can do. Talking of barmaids, one of the tabloids reckons that Liz McDonald
will be taking over the Rovers when Shelley leaves this summer with the bloke
of her dreams. I've wanted Liz to take over the pub for a long time
and this is great news indeed, to me anyroad, that she'll be given a more
central role on the Street.
And as the Baldwin storyline has taken most of the week to unravel itself
and it'll dominate the coming weeks with the will and the funeral, there's
little left to say this week. Kelly's mate Becky is starting to turn
nasty at Underworld when she thinks Joanne's getting too friendly with Kel.
And Tyrone's holding back from a more physical relationship with Molly,
who's keen as mustard for a bit of rumpeh-pumpeh but Tyrone's worried she'll
find him monstrous in the nuddy. He seeks advice from Jack while Vera
mollifies Molly.
And that's just about that for this week.
Glenda
If the update comes to you this week with a slight
whiff of eau d'emulsion with an undercurrent of undercoat it's because I'm
writing this as I take a break from decorating our bathroom. I've got
radiator paint in my hair, gloss in my fingernails and emulsion on the end
of my nose. I'm in my decorating trousers which were a new pair of
combats about 10 years ago (and yes, they do still fit although admittedly
the top bottom has long since lost any inclination of being fastened) and
am more than ready now for a bath and a strong cup of tea. And so, without
any further ado, here we go with this week's Coronation Street update.
If you'd like your weekly update with pictures and fun Corrie stuff, have
a look at :
http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com
Once again Mike Baldwin dominates the update this week although he's
now dead and has ceased to exist. There are fights over the will
when Danny wins it all - the factory, the villa, the golf shirts - and Adam
tells Ken and Deirdre he's going to contest it. This week there's
been lots of glowering, lots of tears, a bit of shouting and you'd be forgiven
for thinking you were in an episode of Eastenders when Mike's funeral cortege
left the cobbles. All it needed was a pearly king and queen, what
with its black plumed horses, black carriage, top hats and long coats.
Archie Shuttleworth, undertaker of the parish, turned up and caused Audrey's
heart to flutter again which put Keith in a strop and filled Blanche with
a bit of gossip to share with Norris.
So, Mike's funeral and will took up most of the events on the street
this week but there was life elsewhere, oh yes indeed. Social worker
Genna calls in on the Battersby-Browns to judge whether Les and Ches can
become dad and lad. She tells Les she knows he lied about his
criminal record and needs to find out more to ensure that Les will be a
fit dad for young Chesney. Things look like they're going well, or
as well as can be expected with Cilla and Les when Cilla spies Janice, who's
had more than a sniff of the barmaid's apron at Mike's wake in the Rovers,
and the two women end up scrapping on the street as Genna looks on in dismay.
Chesney's in tears and hugs up to Fiz.
Tyrone and Molly finally get to grips with each other as Jack and Vera
leave them alone in the house. Tyrone's nervous about Molly seeing
him naked, he reckons he's fat, hairy and minging and when he tells Molly
this she replies that she thought he was hanging back from her because
she wasn't as beautiful as his ex-girlfriend Maria. When they had it all
sorted out, Molly grabbed her fella with: "Gis a snog then". Ah, bless,
so romantic.
Liz and Vernon moved into a flat of their own this week and so Steve
and Ronnie decide to celebrate with a romantic night in, a candle-lit bath
and a bottle of red. It all goes by-the-way though when Liz and Vernon
return as their new landlord has thrown them out before they even moved
in. He took one look at Vernon's drum kit and decided he didn't approve
of a premature paradiddle and so made them skedaddle.
It's Gail's birthday and there's another card from Richard Hillman. She's
all upset and in tears but I have no sympathy for the woman. Four words,
Gail: Go To The Police. I was quite interested in this storyline once, but
not any more. Gail even thinks Richard could still be alive and tormenting
her. Oh for heavens sake Gail, wake up and smell the formaldehyde.
Norris continues with his quest to find love online from the computer
in the back room of the Kabin. He tut-tuts at an email from a woman called
Sandra who's email is full of spelling errors. But he still sets
up a lunch date with her only to report back to Rita and Emily that he
thought Sandra rather common. But his rod begins to twitch again
as Norris reels in more female replies to his lonely hearts ad, thinking
he might sort out the wheat from the chav by way of a questionnaire and
a general knowledge quiz.
In the salon, Tracy refuses to pay when Sarah's work on Tracy's talons
isn't up to scratch. When Sarah complains, Jason tells her to lay
off Tracy because she's just had an abortion. Armed with this piece
of juicy gossip, Sarah tells Audrey who tells Blanche and it gets back to
Tracy, of course. Just how long will it be before the real truth
comes out that there was no baby and no abortion?
And that's just about that for this week. Now then, where's that
kettle gone?
Glenda
