August 3, 2009

Greetings fellow Corrie fans and welcome to another weekly drop of the good stuff. And so, without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.

 

If you’d like your Coronation Street weekly update with pictures and fun stuff, then you might enjoy the Coronation Street blog  http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com and follow it on twitter http://www.twitter.com/corrie_blogger

 

Chesney acts out his angst about his sister and Stape when he finds Fiz’s engagement ring. He nicks Rosie Webster’s new sport scar and lurches around on the cobbles trying to contain the monster on wheels. I’m much the same with the shopping trollies at Morrisons. Anna Windass comes to his rescue when he almost runs her down, she gives him good advice when she finds out he’s robbed Rosie’s car. “Get out, wipe your prints off and leg it.” But he’s left Fiz’s engagement ring in the car when he legs it and Rosie finds the ring when she’s cleaning the car. Note to self: must buy high heels, short shorts and a blouse that unbuttons down to there next time I’m cleaning the car. Second note to self: also buy a car.  Anyway, Rosie gives the ring to Sally, telling her it’s an expensive gift she’s bought for her mum and the factory girls go ‘aah’ as they see Sally enthralled and then ‘oooh’ when they see her humiliated as Fiz nicks the ring back. And that’s when the Stape hit the fan as the factory girls find out that Fiz is engaged to be married to the no-mark that is jailbird John Stape. As they say round our parts, he’s a dodge-pocket. Don’t ask me what it means, but he’s one, all right.  Rosie and Sally know that this means Chesney must have been the one who nicked Rosie’s car but Fiz protects her brother and tells them that she’s the tea-leaf.

 

Over at Emily’s the lights are off and she’s cosy on the sofa with Ramsay, tea, and a slideshow of the Lakes and a picture of her wedding to Earnest. Norris comes home to find the cosy scene and he’s not best pleased, especially when he finds out that Ramsay’s eaten his pie. Rita suggests to Norris that the cosy scene he’s seen could mean Emily and Ramsay have a thing for one other. Perhaps it’s another pie?

 

Joe’s grizzly this week when David refuses to give him the painkillers unless Joe tells Tina to get back with David. Joe tries, he really does, but his words choke him as Tina questions why he now thinks David’s the best thing since sliced bread. Joe loses his cool with David – Joe: “I do not have an addiction!” David: “Joe, take a chill pill!” - and he pins him up by the scruff of the neck against the wall in Gail’s house. Apart from Martin Platt and Ted, has there ever been a fella living in Gail’s house who David hasn’t had the displeasure of that position with?

 

But Tina’s got more on her mind than her dad being peculiar about Psycho Dave. She and Jason are getting a joint mortgage to buy the flat at No. 12 after Eileen loans them the money she’s received from cashing in her dad’s shares.

 

Becky and Steve plan wedding v.2.0. The date’s August 14th, the cake’s being made by Eddie Windass, the maid of honour is Hayley and Becky’s £200 richer when Roy gives her a gift of hard cash, always the best kind, don’t you find. She offers some of this to Slug when she spies him coasting on the cobbles but he declines the dosh and slithers off. She then heads into town with Hayley to a posh wedding frock shop but the snooty assistant insists Becky wears gloves before touching the gowns. Becky storms out in a huff and wanders back in later with Steve and his credit card. In a Pretty Woman moment, he tells Becky to buy the dress of her dreams which costs so much it’ll give Steve nightmares for years. She also buys a blue garter: “It’s for keeping me fags in,” she tells the snooty cow behind the counter.

 

Michelle Connor returned this week and immediately has Peter Barlow on the sniff. He buys her a drink in the Rovers and says he wants to start off where they left off but Michelle sticks out her new boobs and says she just wants to be friends. Then Luke spies Michelle and you can tell his tail’s wagging, his nose’s wet and he’s panting for a stroke under the chin, or anywhere really. Rosie’s not pleased, as you can imagine.

 

And that’s just about that for this week.

 

Find out more about these Coronation Street Weekly Updates.

http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com/2009/03/sign-up-for-coronation-street-weekly.html

 

Coronation Street writers this week were Julie Jones, David Lane, Daran Little, Martin Allen and Mark Wadlow.

 

Glenda

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Blogging away merrily at http://flamingnora.blogspot.com

 

August 10, 2009

 

Here we go again with another weekly update. The update this week is on standby for its turn on the fourth plinth in Trafalgar Square, waiting for someone to fall ill or fall off and then it will shine in its hour of fame. It’s got its repertoire of Shirley Bassey hits rehearsed to perfection and a silver glitter frock with a white feather boa waiting in the wings. If only that phone would ring…  but until it does and without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.

 

If you’d like your Coronation Street weekly update with pictures and fun stuff, then you might enjoy the Coronation Street blog  http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com and follow it on twitter http://www.twitter.com/corrie_blogger

 

Gail clucks round Joe when he goes cold turkey. He’s in pain and drunk, depressed and out of pills when he breaks into the medical centre with a pick-axe and  lump hammer while Morrissey sings on the radio: “Please, please, please, let me get what I want.” Joe gets more than he wants, he gets arrested by the cops who take him away and then bring him back to Gail. David tries to tempt Joe to get back on the pills but Joe’s being strong, in between bursts of tears and cups of tea on Gail’s settee. Tina figures out that Graeme and David were supplying her dad with the pills and waits to get David on his own to threaten him with something nasty if she ever takes her revenge, and she just might.  Gail moans to Audrey that Joe’s recovery depends on her being strong and they have a moan about men. “Why don’t you get yourself a nice man, a normal man?” asks Audrey to Gail. “You mean someone like Alf…” replies Gail with disdain, which I thought really sad ‘cos wasn’t Alfeh a gent among men?

 

Over at the factory, Rosie threatens to withdraw her cash after Luke cools off her and warms towards Michelle who’s now back in town. In the war of the cleavage Luke Strong is too weak to fight Rosie off. “She’s less interesting company than a dead crustacean,” he tells Michelle about Rosie but Rosie’s dead-crab eyes home in on Luke and when she threatens to take her spends out of ladies pants, Luke pretends he’ll support Rosie’s designer lingerie line. Perhaps he’s got a thing about thongs?

 

At the auction rooms, Eileen nips to the loo to spend a penny which costs her almost five thousand pounds. She tells Jason not to go over his budget but there’s a posh blonde bit behind him who’s also after Number 12 so Jason has to raise his bid and the hammer comes down on the flat for £54,750. Sold to the man with the irate mother.

 

Maria returns from Ireland this week, full of blarney and pictures of horses in fields. Tony greets her and the baby with a bouquet and hug and then, oh, I couldn’t look, I really couldn’t, they kiss, right in front of LiaMaria’s wedding picture too.

 

At the Windass house, Chesney’s being treated like a prince as he’s still not speaking to Fiz over Stape. Anna cooks for him and lets him watch the telly while Eddie seeks his expert opinion on cake. What more can a boy need? Eddie’s gearing up to make Steve and Becky’s wedding cake and draws up the doings on some paper in the caff. Roy takes a look and determines the historical details aren’t all they’re cracked up to be, something about columns, cherubs and Greek temples, all forming part of many things of which Roy is an expert of course.

 

Speaking of experts, Graeme’s Blackpool Tower made out of sausage wins this week’s work of art award, closely followed by his knowledge of black and white movies. “Norma Shearer!” he cries to Blanche’s surprise when she quizzes him on her top 10 old movies with strong female leads. It’s not often Blanche’s left stuck for words but she does the decent thing and buys the lad a pint.

 

And as Becky and Steve discussed wedding plans in the Rovers this week, the song playing on the juke box was appropriate enough: “It Must be Love” by Madness, for madness is surely what their big day will bring. (Q: What’s the first sign of Madness? A: Suggs walking down your garden path).

 

And that’s just about that for this week.

 

Find out more about these Coronation Street Weekly Updates.

http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com/2009/03/sign-up-for-coronation-street-weekly.html

 

Coronation Street writers this week were  John Kerr, Simon Crowther, Chris Fewtrell, Mark Burt and Damon Rochefort.

 

Glenda

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Blogging away merrily at http://flamingnora.blogspot.com

 

August 17, 2009

 

Come in, wipe your feet, sit down, chill out. The update this week is wearing its happy hat as it hurtles towards my birthday this coming weekend. Bring on the cake! And so, without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.

 

If you’d like your Coronation Street weekly update with pictures and fun stuff, then you might enjoy the Coronation Street blog  http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com and follow it on twitter http://www.twitter.com/corrie_blogger

 

The big story this week is Steve and Becky’s wedding. From Anna and Hayley shaking their cardigan-clad booty to Gilbert O’Sullivan’s ‘Matrimony’ at Becky’s sober hen-do through to Steve shaking his beer belly on the morning of the wedding, it’s been a jiggle of a wedding and one that ended in tears. At the hen-do, Becky asks Betty for some words of marital advice to which Betty gave this priceless little gem: “Always fill the kettle before you go to bed in case the water goes off in the morning.”

 

Anyway, Liz legged it back from Spain as Spanish Barbie and then flounced around in a flamenco frock having a mid-life crisis before dumping Lloyd. Then the father of the groom, big Jim from norn iron turned up with Andy in tow bringing the whole McDonald clan back together again. And so far, no-one’s hit anyone else. So the bride and groom got to the registrar office, sober, and the fella at the front pronounces them man and wife. I thought it was ‘husband and wife’ these days rather than ‘man and his possession’, and why can’t couples be pronounced wife and husband instead? And yes, I am on my feminist soap soapbox again.  Anyway, the wedding’s done, but Becky wants confirmation. “Are you sure?” she asks the registrar before snogging the face off her newly betrothed.

 

Th’appy couple then wend their way to the Rovers where there’s balloons and feathers to match Becky’s frock, the champagne’s cracked open and the pies are under a low light. And that’s when it all goes horribly wrong. Hooch pays Slug to put drugs in Becky’s handbag earlier that day and although Betty spots Slug slithering out of the Rovers, she doesn’t recognise Slug or wonder what he’s been up to in the pub so early in the day, she just assumes he’s a punter in need of a pint and tells him the pub’s shut for a private do. But at the wedding reception the cops arrive, search everyone, including Betty’s stash of angina and cholesterol pills before they find the drugs and take Becky to the cop shop where DC Hooch licks his lips with glee that he’s finally nabbed Becky.

 

No-one believes Becky’s innocence, not even Steve at first and Liz has some evil words for her new daughter-in-law: “You’re a dirty, disgusting, drug-dealing tramp!” Steve comes round to believing  Becky and then tries to bribe Hooch, giving him two grand in cash. “Every village needs an idiot,” says Hooch as he drives away with Steve’s cash in his hand, leaving Steve on the pavement looking somewhat glum. As the ITV continuity woman said: “Oh, Steve, what’ve you gone and done now?”

 

Elsewhere this week, Tony and Maria went public on their lurve thang and the nation’s stomach heaved. Michelle finds them snogging by the sofa and gets straight on the phone to Ireland to tell Mammy Connor to take a deep breath and do ten Hail Mary’s ‘cos her suspicions were right all along about Maria and the dark fella with the dodgy eye.

 

Other news in a week dominated by the McDonald-Granger bash is that Norris sacks Ramsay from the Kabin after he smashes his best cup. Even though Ramsay buys his brother another mug, it doesn’t meet with Norris’ approval. “What about its memories?” he asks. Indeed, tea will never taste the same, not in a new cup. Ramsay doesn’t care about the sacking or the mug, he’s planning his return to Australia, news which fair dampens Emily’s mood.

 

And Molly and Tyrone return from their jollies this week. Molly’s back with a tan under her strapless top and goes straight into doing the laundry and mashing potatoes for Tyrone’s tea. No wonder the girl thinks Kev Webster’s a catch when her life’s so dreary and dull.  Kev does his best to escape Molly’s clutches and tells Sally he thinks they should go house hunting in the posh part of town. By ‘eck.

 

I’m off now to fill up our kettle, just in case.

 

And that’s just about that for this week.

 

Coronation Street writers this week were  Carmel Morgan, Joe Turner and David Lane.

 

Glenda

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Blogging away merrily at http://flamingnora.blogspot.com

http://www.corrieweeklyupdates.btinternet.co.uk

 

August 24, 2009

 

Welcome to another weekly wotsit of wonder. So there’s another week gone and I’m another year older after celebrating my birthday at the weekend. There was cake, there was wine, presents, cards and a sigh of resignation on hitting a milestone of sorts.  And so, without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.

 

If you’d like your Coronation Street weekly update with pictures and fun stuff, then you might enjoy the Coronation Street blog  http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com and follow it on twitter http://www.twitter.com/corrie_blogger

 

Blink and you’d have missed them. Last week they turned up and this week they left. Andy and Jim McDonald took a taxi to the airport after kissing Elizabeth goodbye on the cobbles and then they legged it.  But much was said during their mini-return. We had Jim’s catchphrases out in force, the “so it is” and “catch yerself on” and lo and behold, even an “Ulster Fry”. Come back soon, Jim McDonald, you’re sorely missed by Corrie fans in our big house, so you are.

 

And those left behind as Andy and Jim left were Mr and Mrs Becky and Steve McDonald, newly married publicans of the parish along with the woman who we must never forget has her name above the door. Elizabeth McDonald is back to her bitching self, daggers drawn to get her nails into Becky for no other reason than she’s got her hooks into her son and therefore will always be the other woman in Liz’s life. After Liz dumps Lloyd, Betty finds her crying in the back room of the Rovers and Liz comes clean about the truth about her tears. “It’s the menopause, Betty,” Liz sobs into her hanky. Betty pulls that face that she does, tells Liz to buy a cardi, wear layers and not to worry about facial hair because sooner rather than later it’ll come through grey and no-one’ll notice. This was a brilliant scene, it was just right with Betty neither too gushing and friendly (which Betty never is) nor too acid-tongued (which she can be), all set to the Joe Jackson track, “Different for Girls”.

 

Meanwhile, Steve and Becky do their best to find Slug after they see a solicitor to report DC Hooch for planting drugs in the Rovers. Photocopied photos of Slug are sent around all the Manchester cabbies and he’s spotted in the Flying Horse but by the time Steve gets there, Slug’s slithered off. Married life gets off to a crime-ridden start for the McDonalds with a jail term hanging over Becky head and a lifetime of gurns to come from Steve.

 

Graeme’s the advice guru this week, warning Ashley that Claire’s on the warpath putting on the warpaint, waiting for Ashley to bring her some fresh sausage home.  Trouble is, Ashley still hasn’t told Claire that he hasn’t had the snip and so he arranges with Graeme to sabotage Claire’s saucy  session by bursting in on her with a plant pot and Graeme Proctor, Garden Doctor in tow. The camera panned upwards from Claire’s stockings and suspenders and I have to admit, my blokey got quite aroused by this scene. Well, he put his Guardian crossword down, which is always a good sign. But when the camera panned up to reveal it was Claire, he tutted loudly and went back to his paper. I’m a little worried he was hoping for Blanche. 

 

Amber’s off to that London after celebrating getting into Kings College to study at Uni. Graeme warns Darryl that once she’s gone to that London, the bright lights and big city will turn her head and she’ll never look back. I should know, it’s done the same to me.

 

Over the road, Sally and Kev set off in Rosie’s posh car to look at posh homes in Cheshire. Kev wants to move as far away as possible to get rid of Molly but she’s hanging around him like a bad smell and is slowly drawing Kevin back to her with her ‘come-hither and get your meat pie’ eyes.

 

David Platt’s beaten up this week, he’s bloodied and bruised and blames Joe and then Jason. Poor Jason gets arrested and taken to the cop shop which prompts a disappointing bout of slapping between Eileen and Gail on the cobbles. I was rather hoping for some hair-pulling and more name-calling between the two old foes. Just when David’s sure it was Jason who beat him, he bumps into Gary Windass and although Gary’s just got out of the big house that very morning, he lets David know that he has friends on the outside that he made on the inside and who’re on his side, if David gets his meaning. David gets his meaning and finally puts two and two together to add up to four bruised ribs. 

 

Over at the Barlow’s, Deirdre’s made redundant from her job at the council and worries about her future. She takes to the Rovers where she’s given a glass of red on the house from Betty, who takes up knitting behind the bar this week and works at it even less successfully than she does serving up booze.

 

Next door at Emily’s, she and Ramsay go out to lay flowers on Ernest’s grave. Rita persuades Ramsay to stay around on the Street rather than head back to Australia and he views a flat in Victoria Court. Norris thinks his brother’s soon leaving for Oz and no one’s got the heart to tell him just yet that he’s not.

 

Finally this week, Jesse moves in with Eileen and brings his pet parrot, John. While Jesse and Eileen get along fine, John’s got other plans and takes against Eileen with an attack stance. “Ooh, it’s like having Gail Platt in a cage in the corner of the room,” Eileen moans to Sean on the sofa.

 

And that’s just about that for this week.

 

Find out more about these Coronation Street Weekly Updates.

http://www.corrieweeklyupdates.btinternet.co.uk

 

Coronation Street writers this week were  Daran Little, John Kerr, Jayne Hollinson and Simon Crowther.

 

Glenda

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Blogging away merrily at http://flamingnora.blogspot.com

http://www.corrieweeklyupdates.btinternet.co.uk

 

 

August 31, 2009

 

Greetings and welcome to another weekly update which comes with a note for lateness due to the fact that I’m not very well. In fact, I’m writing this to you from my bed at the St. Aloysius home for wayward girls with a fever. Matron will be round with the medication at half past, so I’d best crack on. Before I start, I’m going on my jollies once I escape from Matron and for the next three weeks the updates will be brought to you by John Dean and Richard Whitbread. My huge thanks go to them both.  I’ll be back at the end of September but until then, ta-ra.

 

If you’d like your Coronation Street weekly update with pictures and fun stuff, then you might enjoy the Coronation Street blog  http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com and follow it on twitter http://www.twitter.com/corrie_blogger

 

We only had three episodes of Corrie this week but they were packed full of comedy, tears and a bill-a-bong.  Emotions ran high in Emily’s house, first when Ramsay bade farewell and headed back to Australia and then when the police came to tell Norris that his brother had died of a brain tumour on the plane. It was too much, too raw, just when Emily had got over saying farewell to her fella, she then had to deal with the fact he was dead. And not just that, she didn’t half give Norris short-shrift over his dealings with Ramsay: “You’re a silly, blinkered, selfish little man!” So there were tears, recriminations and over a soundtrack of Waltzing Matilda, the camera panned from Emily’s front room to Norris laying flowers at his mother’s grave. It was a very poignant, moving scene that almost had me in tears. Almost.

 

Over at Eileen’s house, she’s battling with Jesse’s other bird, John. The parrott takes the TV remote and changes channels while Ma Grimshaw’s settling down to watch telly with a nice spot of cake. Come on, Eileen, you’ve battled Gail Platt to the ground in your dressing gown before now, how hard can getting along with a parrott be?

 

And the only other big story of the week was the Bank Holiday Street fete. Claire Peacock had gone into overdrive organising this, and you have to hand it to the woman, when she puts her tiny mind to something, she really goes all out. There was a bouncy castle, stalls, ice cream van, balloons, streamers and kids in fancy dress and all for a good cause, to raise funds for Claire’s DVT support group. “Support group?” huffs Blanche. “In my day, you got drunk and bit on a shoe.”

 

Mind you, it doesn’t stop Blanche spotting a chance to make cash at Claire’s fete and she does herself up as Gypsy Rose Hunt in the front room to read fortunes for three quid a go. First in is Kelly Crabtree and Blanche looks deep into her palm. “I see fellas,” she tells Kelly. “Many fellas, especially if you keep dressing like a tart”. Kelly huffs out back to the fete as Graeme comes in for his reading with Blanche although we never got to find out what words of wisdom Blanche passed on to the Street’s new garden doc.

 

Little Joshua and Simon are dressed up as Batman and Robin and holy bee-sting, Josh goes into shock after being stung by a bee. Superheroine Janice Battersby comes to the rescue, puts Josh into the recovery position and then panics, screaming. Josh is rushed to hospital where he stabilises in some bad pyjamas and Claire and Ashley breath a sigh of relief. Honestly, what is it with that family? In the words of Erasure, it’s just one psychological drama after another.

 

And finally, Molly and Kevin go on a fun run together and end up in bed in a sleazy motel. Ooh, nasty.

 

I’ll be back in three weeks time. Be good.

 

Coronation Street writers this week were Chris Fewtrell and Damon Rochefort.

 

Glenda

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Blogging away merrily at http://flamingnora.blogspot.com

http://www.corrieweeklyupdates.btinternet.co.uk

 


Witten by Glenda Young , writer of Coronation Street Weekly Updates for the internet since 1995.

 

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