I love Coronation
Street. I've been watching it since I was little and I'm 5' 9" now.
I used to watch it with my mam and my grandma. Mam used to tut at
Elsie Tanner's cleavage and me and grandma used to tut at mam. I've been a fan of Corrie
for as long as I can remember, it's been part of my life for more
years then most of my family have. But I'm not enjoying it any
more. Not now, not for a while. It's gone downhill and I know it'll
come back up but it's so blinking dull at the minute I've been doing
things I've never done before while Corrie's been on TV, like
walking out of the room or worse still, changing channels. You'll excuse me, therefore,
if the update this week takes a cynical turn as it'll be critical of
Corrie more than usual although there were of course some wonderful
highlights, glimpses of the Corrie I know and have always loved.
So here we go
starting off with the highlight that was Ken and Deirdre taking up
an evening class for old crocks, pottery throwing. Ken wants to sculpt an
Etruscan Urn, Deirdre wants to make an ashtray so when Deirdre's
pottery teacher praises her to the hilt for her urn work, Ken sulks
in the corner over the attention that Deirdre's attracting for her
talent."He wouldn't know an Etruscan urn if Tracy hit him over the
head with it!" cries Ken, or Keith as the pottery teacher calls
him. Ken's sculpture's
more flaccid, a limp little vase that you could probably stick a
couple of carnations in if you were so
inclined.
More highlights
courtesy of the Barlows was the return of Ken's gay grandson James,
who he invites to move in, much to Deirdre's chagrin. Ooh, I don't think I've ever used
chagrin in a weekly update before. Where he'll sleep is anyone's
guess as there's already a house full with Ken, Deirdre, little Amy
and Tracy with her ten multiple personalities who all demand a room
of their own.
A further highlight
was Gail, desperate to cling onto her Nicky as he ventures forth
with his new bistro.
She tries and fails to get the bar manager's job and ends up
as the cleaner instead."I'll just go and give the gents a good
bottoming," she tells Nick before scuttling off in her pinny. But when Nick tells her he wants her out
of sight before the wine tasting evening, Gail pouts and feels put
out, but them glams up in a new frock, and shines with the
Chardonnay.
Shame on the sham
wedding for making me lose heart in Corrie and
let's rejoice that it could soon be over. Mary grasses up Xin and
Graeme and they get a call from a wonderfully bumptious inspector
from the UK Border Agency. They lie throughout their interview and
pass with flying colours, Xin gets her visa and has feelings for
Graeme while Tina smoulders in a bad mood and cool t-shirt behind
the bar of the Rovers pulling pints with just an extra bit of
bitter. Xin flirts with
Graeme and helps him with his window cleaning round and I know, I
just know, I wasn't the only one who hooted with laughter when she
fell off the ladder. Oh
go on, admit it, you
know you did too. Be
gone, Xin, be gone. You were a waste of space and we really didn't
care. "Love is a four
letter word," Tina tells the Border Angecy inspector."So is visa," he
replied. So is dull.
As this was a Bank
Holiday weekend, Corrie took its outside broadcast crew to Blackpool
again where Steve and Tracy rehashed an old storyline. Amy went missing, Steve's
car got towed away and they all had to stay in a B&B overnight
but hush, don't tell Becky because she'll go mental. Tracy makes
sure that Becky finds out and yes she went mental, taking herself
out on the booze for a binge and a bloke. She was wearing well, you
know, an outfit that made the men of the nation go"Phwoar". I know my mam would have
tutted.
Don't forget, I
really am looking for a
job!
And that's just about
that for this week.
This week's writers
were Simon Crowther, Chris Fewtrell, Mark Wadlow and Martin Allen.
Find out more about the Coronation Street writing team at:
http://coronationstreetupdates.blogspot.com/2008/11/exclusive-all-current-corrie-writers.html